My husband’s current energy and attitude makes me want to go somewhere else. He’s all stressed because we have a lot of housework to do. It’s on my list, but I have other things I NEED to focus on first—things due tomorrow. His attitude is really starting to trigger me. My chest is tightening; my stress and anxiety are bounding. My motivation and productivity are plummeting. I’ve gently shared this with him and am trying to meditate with my dog, but he keeps creeping on that too. Any suggestions are welcome!

Thank you! Right back at you! If I let myself, I’d never sleep just trying to prepare the “perfect” lessons because of OCD. But luckily, I now also know if I don’t sleep, the “perfect” lesson plan will be completely useless. It’s just another thing for us OCD sufferers to balance, but getting to teach makes fighting the OCD so worth it! Here’s to us both/all getting to enjoy the best parts of the best job! 💜

Yes! The things at the top of my list are to prepare for teaching my classes, so kinda work and school. And this week will be the longest one for me yet. Last week by the 3rd day of classes, I was fighting off some creeping illnesses that debilitate me when I am too stressed and don’t sleep enough, so it’s imperative that I spend extra time before this upcoming full week to prepare more fully. Plus, if I barely have time to sleep because of lesson planning, teaching, and all the other administrative tasks, there is no way I’ll have time to even maintain any bit of a clean house! He does help a lot with our household chores. (He didn’t used to as much, but he’s also so happy that I’m working so much.). The problem is, some stuff he either hasn’t paid attention to how or where it goes before or it’s truly “my” stuff/mess. Now, a lot of that gets mixed in with “our” mess, but I understand his confusion. Though it would also help me if he at least told me he moved some of that, especially before he forgets where he put it, so I knew it still needed tending to. He and I chatted a few times, and his energy went from mopey to working, but then he sounded like a stressed out elephant who’s not aware of how he’s stomping or slamming things. Oddly, what’s helped the most right now is that after he cleaned a kitchen counter, he had a drink explode on it. This made him stomp more as he re-cleaned it. But then he knocked a drink over after recleaning it. That let him realize he did need to “pump the breaks” beyond just me trying to calmly talk it through with him. It also helped that he saw our dog was stressing too at how noisily and booming he was. While he cares about me more than any other creature on the planet, it’s sometimes hard to hear what’s essentially “calm down”. So luckily, the universe gave him some hints that didn’t come from me. Thank you so much for caring and your suggestions. While today is starting to look better, this is something that can often creep up on us, especially now that I’m working more. 💜