18+ ONLY TW: POSSIBLE SEXUAL ASSAULT/HARASSMENT Ok so I want to explain my situation so I can get other people’s insight onto what I should do with this. In high school, I had a free period to study and one of the guys in my grade suddenly kept sitting next to me. When he did, he would “play around” and grab my thigh or poke my boob. I laughed nervously and idk if i told him to stop or not but i definitely wanted to. A different guy from my grade who happened to be in the same class, noticed and asked if i was ok. He decided that he would try to sit there instead, so several times he just told him “hey me and ________ have some homework to do and i need her help” and so my friend would sit there instead, but the guy would try to push it saying “really? What homework?” I guess he did it to another girl i knew and she got mad at him for it, and I was finally able to stand up for myself a bit. I remember he realized he’d fucked up and as an “apology”, he handed me a stick of gum. Then not even 10 mins later in the lunch line he grabbed my shoulders. I also had a very very toxic relationship with a friend for around five years. Starting sophomore year she would grope my ass and boobs. My friend mentioned to me this year that she did the same thing the year before, but no matter how hard I look I genuinely don’t remember that happening at all. I’m saying all this honestly one to get it out there, but also bc I’m confused. Was i harassed? Assaulted? Was i just too weak to say something? Im so confused on what happened and how i should feel. My friends said it was harassment but then now when i talk to my friend about it she says it wasn’t. I’m not asking for someone to say it is or isn’t, but I really want to know wtf was that?

Any physical contact that's unwanted and unwarranted can be classified as harassment.

In 2000's it'd only have been considered as "playing around" bc girls and boys always were poked or grabbed. Even boys were grabbed I don't know if you know this game in the Usa but in Europe for exemple there was a game like - you come from behind the dude, you seize his "intimate part" and ask him to whizzle and only if he does so you let him go (of course the dude couldn't whizzle in this situation its impossible lmao), the dude trapped did the same thing a few hours later to the guy who trapped him before. I mean I wouldn't be as firm as the man up above my post. But it is also true that time has changed and we certainly have a different view of what is harassing or not. Let me get this clear I'm not saying the man you're referencing to would be right to make you feel unconfortable each time he comes accross you, but I think for your own sake that you shouldn't be feeling like you were abused because you would create a traumatism to yourself for something which as it sounds to me, were at first "playing around". Next time be firmer with him, don't laugh bc you could give him the impression that it's fine for you to be "played around". If you are firmer and he continues on grabbing and poking, then it is harassment.

So funny how a subject discussed with her and her friends, who themselves said to her at last that it wasn't harassment (and they're were THERE unlike you) end up having someone like you *asking to disregard* a simple point of view of the whole situation - which btw is what was asked from her at first wasn't it? 😑 From all I know she didn't write "I WAS sexually assaulted, she did write" what do you guys think about this situation me and my friends are talking about - some of them think it was harassment, and some of them think it WASN'T). We weren't there, her friends were there, and they themselves shared my point of view at last, period. Keep it cool please, and let people giving their point of view without being judgmental, that's the beauty and the essence of this app.

"Please reach out and disregard this person's comments" is another way to say "Don't listen to this dumb", And WTF it means "I don't think grown men should be advising underage girls" all of your sentences are so weird you say mean stuff without saying them anyway, I got sexually abused when I was a child and I've been living with OCD for 27 years bc of it so I fucking know more how it is to be destroyed by sexual abuse than you could ever imagine in your entire life. There's a huge difference between giving your point of view and being judgmental toward me, and influence someone asserting things so that you weren't there (again, even her friends were confused about whether it was harassment or not).