I could use some advice, maybe from multiple people. This isn't exactly OCD related but anxiety and mental health related and I didn't know where else to go for for advice. So basically recently my sister got into a relationship and she is 16 and old enough for one so its nothing to do with her and her bf, it more has to do with me. I'm 20 and in college and haven't dsteddated anyone yet. It hurts sometimes to think about and it seems my mom is always bringing up my sister's bf and telling people she has one, etc and it honestly makes me feel awful about myself. I am really afraid my mom or other family members think I am a freak for never having a bf. I really want to talk to my mom about and just tell her what's on my heart and how I feel like a weirdo for never having a relationship. But i didn't know if this would be a form of reassurance seeking or if it would make things worse bc I've been trying to just play it off like i don't care and stuff so i don't know if I'll regret talking to her or if it would just be weird. Any advice would be appreciated. Sorry for the long random post

crxsss

Date posted: 4y

you do not need a lover to be content or fulfilled in life. thats just society’s stereotype where we “need” a marriage with kids and a house with a fence. do not listen to those stereotypes or else you won’t be truly content in life

Anxiousaddie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 4y

I understand that. It is something I want though. I just have social anxiety and don't know how to go about dating and relationships. I do think society puts wayyyyy to much pressure on people to date, get married and have kids though....

crxsss

Date posted: 4y

@Anyonomous i understand, i’m sorry if it sounded too blunt all i was trynna say was that it’s completely alright and normal to not have relationships yet. but yes that’s why a lot of us think we’ll only be happy when we have partners but that’s untrue and biased

Anxiousaddie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 4y

Also do you guys think it would be a good idea to talk to my mom or would that be like reassurance seeking?

crxsss

Date posted: 4y

well is she the understanding type?

Anxiousaddie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 4y

@crxsss She is. We are pretty close.

crxsss

Date posted: 4y

@Anyonomous that’s great! to me i don’t see it as reassurance seeking because they aren’t realizing that they’re hurting you

Anxiousaddie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 4y

@crxsss Okay. I think that makes sense. I'm just afriad it will make me overthink more. I tend to go over conversations a lot and wonder if the person judges me. She is understanding though so I'm sure she wouldn't be but still

crxsss

Date posted: 4y

@Anyonomous i completely relate, but remember thoughts are only thoughts, you wouldn’t know how she’ll react until you try

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