i have a male co worker - enough said for someone with a boyfriend who’s in a committed relationship and doesn’t want anything to ruin it. my brain will go to things that could ruin it. having a male co worker around sorta my age he’s a little older then me, is annoying as fuck. iv had thought like regarding “attraction” to him, i wouldn’t do anything (as typing that my brain was like but would u do anything really? saying like what if i possibly would) - and i hate it literally bc it’s like why am i even thinking this like stop just fucking stop i wish i could just work alone and not around males- i am attracted to females but they r different to me - males are just completely uncomfortable regarding my committed relationship i just wish i couldn’t associate with them at all bc of my thinking.. i think i just need male validation bc of my fathers emotionally unavailableness. i only just recently found that out that i like to have male validation bc of that. i have talked and engaged with a lot of males in my past.. and because of my ocd told my boyfriend now about that (like last year) and it ruined our relationship but everything’s ok now. but ya.. it really sucks having to deal with this. i applied to another job where there’s a lot more females then males. i don’t feel the same towards females and my partner knows i’m attracted to them- so it doesn’t give me much anxiety. & what sucks is when i’m asked does ocd give u anxiety - yes this part of it but it is so hard to explain so i just say no. other parts it could give me anxiety but not as much as this one.