- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
My fiancé has OCD though his developed through a traumatic experience.
And to add, there’s always a chance you don’t know you have a mental illness, of course. But there are always signs.
Yes my partner and I both have ocd, which of course can be triggering to my own ocd lol since it feels improbable that we would both have the same mental disorder, I always doubt that I really have ocd. But yes, we both have it and I know of other people who both them and their partner has ocd.
I actually met the person I’m seeing because I reached out to them in regards to something ocd related and then they thought/think I was/am cute. Lol. I def have concerns about it especially since one of the things we’ve been able to bond over is how similar our ocd and some other experiences are. Especially with (what I hope is) rocd, i want to make sure I don’t go down to slippery a slope and that we continue to affirm and empower and get one another as opposed to just turning into one big, giant anxious spiral of doom and gloom!
From experience I can say there’s a little of both. It has mostly been positive but we have had a few dark periods where our anxieties feed off each other. Communicating what’s going on helps a lot with that though!
What has helped most in terms of communication during those dark periods?
Basically just exploring what is going on together - what the dynamic of the situation is. “It seems to me that I’m doing x which might be causing you to feel/do y. Which then makes me think X.” Rather than theorizing about things on your own, looking at the big picture together, and discussing how partner A can help partner B and vice versa. So for example. My biggest theme right now is sort of a fusion of relationship OCD and perfectionism OCD. It causes me a ton of stress and anxiety if I perceive that my wife isn’t doing well physically or mentally. Well lately she’s been having some alarming medical symptoms. And her anxiety fixated on those and she obsessively brings them up to me, researches, etc. so that makes me really anxious, and makes me compulsively think I have to do everything I can to help her “fix” it or to try and explain the symptoms away which doesn’t work or help. And then my anxiety feeds back into hers, that she feels like she’s crazy/driving me crazy, etc. and then that anxiety comes back again to me. So by talking it out we saw that big picture, and decided that it is good for me and for her to express her symptoms, but not repetitively. Good for me as a form of exposure, good for her to just not bottle it up. So we started having one time a day when she can just vent it all out, and I listen without having to solve anything. And then we move on with our day. This has helped a lot and seems like we’ve felt a lot closer because of that than we have in a little while. So hopefully that answers your question. By talking that
@cheyras LOL I wish you could edit comments on here. SO MANY TYPOS. Maybe it’s on purpose as a form of exposure for us perfectionism OCD folks.
Me and my wife have been married 4.5 years and we both just recently got diagnosed with ocd within the last few weeks! It’s crazy
I’ve struggled a lot with mental illness (severe social anxiety, depression, OCD), but have done a lot of work to get to the great place that I’m at now. I feel like a different person compared to how I felt a few years ago. Here’s my question: I started seeing someone really important to me. We’re not official yet, but we’ve been in each others lives for years and it feels like it’s the real deal. He struggles with OCD, and it’s much worse than mine ever was. My question is, do you think this is healthy for me, as someone who has done the work to get to a better place? He’s not in therapy, he’s against medication (I love my meds — they changed my life), and is generally in a different place than I am mentally.
Hi guys, This is my first post on here, as I’ve been scared to be vulnerable in this way. I’ve had a lifelong journey of mental health, diagnosed with a myriad of things, and misdiagnosed with others. When I got diagnosed with OCD, things started to click and treatment has been going well. There’s still a disconnect, things I do that are different than others and aren’t compulsion or obsession related. The reason I’m posting is to ask if anyone has been diagnosed with OCD/Autism and how you navigated that comorbidity. Thank you to anyone who shares
TW: death This is my first time posting, but I don’t know what to do. My husband who has never exhibited mental health symptoms before has been showing some OCD symptoms like ruminating (to the point where he can’t fall asleep for hours), asking for reassurance repeatedly, and overthinking in a way that it’s like he’s trying to solve problems by thinking about them a lot, but…they’re not actually real problems?? Far-fetched possibilities? We talk through his anxieties to what I think is resolution, just for him to bring it up again 30 min later. I’ve been in NOCD therapy for a month-ish now, and I’ve improved a lot—especially with the exact things my husband has begun to struggle with. I have not asked for reassurance in weeks. I feel like I infected him. I don’t know what to do because I don’t want to be his therapist or tell him what to do. He is in therapy for anxiety about starting a new job, but honestly, his therapist sucks, and he’s decided to find another one, hopefully, that is trained in ACT. I just feel guilty and helpless. Oh also to make it scarier, before I dated my husband, I was in a relationship with someone who had verrryyy severe OCD, to the point where my OCD seemed inconsequential. I was able to help him a lot, but being with him made my OCD worse because a lot of ocs were normalized. My precious parter ended up taking his own life. I’m just really on edge about this. I don’t want my husband to develop OCD and die.
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