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i have been diagnosed with OCD & generalized anxiety disorder. for some reason, i’ve been very hyper aware of everything. like the way i talk, the way i see the world, how certain things sound/look/feel, and it’s very distressing. i feel like the hyper awareness makes me afraid of things? like for some reason, my mind attached to cartoons, and i was hyperfocusing on it, and got extremely scared, like scared of the cartoon for no reason? i’ve done this a lot, and i get scared i have psychosis or schizophrenia, or something that makes you afraid of things for no unknown reason. i feel so scared that this is my new normal…. im heartbroken. so many what if’s. did i just ruin my own life?? 💔

Hi!! My names Calista R. Woodbury-Rabon. I recently got married in March of this year. And have been struggling with my severe anxiety disorder since I left my toxic 3 year relationship about a year ago. Over the past several months, I have noticed that I go through phases where: I have a full body “anxiety attack”. Or at least that’s what I call it. For example : when we went to cookout and they told us they were out of the chili for walking tacos. I had a full blown anxiety attack or at least what I thought was an anxiety attack and starting hyperventilating and crying. Therefore, the only solution (in my mind) was that I wouldn’t be able to calm down until I had the walking tacos. Another example : My husband bought me a pajama set that was only recently put out because it was a patriotic item which means that after the summer it’d be gone… I ended up picking up the wrong size. So that night when I went to put on the Pajamas and realized they were too small I started hyperventilating and crying. All because these $17 pajamas did not fit me and it was no fault of my own. Whenever this happens, I usually end up spiraling and crying and saying a lot at once very quickly. And I usually look crazy and don’t make a lot of sense. Usually after the spiraling is over with I’m very exhausted and usually will cry myself to sleep. My husband more often than not will say stuff like “it’s not that big of a deal you can get something else.” << when it has to do with food etc. OR “we can just buy another set of pjamas the next time I get paid.” << in relation to the pajamas in this instance. But honestly no matter what him or anyone else tells me in that moment. All that matters is that I can feel the anxiety in my bones. And I can’t breathe and in that moment my world as I know it has ended. I’ve tried taking online free “quizzes” to find out if I acctually have OCD and they’ve been negative. I also did some research and learned that you can have all the symptoms for a OCD “flare-up” but present no active case of OCD or symptoms. So I guess what I’m trying to find out is if I don’t have “OCD” than Is this out of body experience caused from my “severe anxiety disorder” diagnosis ? Or just anxiety in general?? Thank you for taking the time to read this even if you also aren’t sure!! Means a lot to me..❤️‍🩹

I’ve never been diagnosed with OCD, but I relate so much to what people here are going through. I used to think it was just anxiety, and I felt like I could handle that. But lately I’ve been spiraling—constantly afraid that what I’m feeling is something worse, like psychosis or losing control of my mind. I feel so detached and scared, and I just want peace again. I have anxiety doing the smallest things, like the thought of waking up everyday and even eating give me straight up panic. I am afraid all the time, it’s paralyzing. And a lot of people say someone with psychosis wouldn’t worry that they’re in it, but then I convince myself I’ve been in it this whole time, and haven’t known, and that maybe I’ve been doing weird stuff. Idk. I also get really scared of labels. Even the idea of OCD makes me feel like I’ll never get better or like I’ll be stuck like this forever. I just want to be okay. If anyone has felt this way—confused, overwhelmed, or scared of what’s happening in their mind—I’d really appreciate any support or encouragement.