- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I've had OCD since I was a child and I've only come to realize it this year. I don't think it matters how long you've had it as long as you get on the road to recovery. It's not irreversible, no such thing. Keep going!
- Date posted
- 4y
i was 12 when i experienced HOCD for the first time and i thought it was some anxiety disorder then i got put on acid reflux pills bc my parents couldn’t get that it wasn’t a physical issue but something to do with my mentality. then it kept escalating throughout the years then it relaxed just a bit until i had my massive relapse a few days ago. this is genuinely the worst my ocd has ever been bc half of it is actual mistakes blended with ocd blended with confusion and stress and i had so much i had to do this summer. i had to finish my resume and look for university programs and get my drivers license but i see nothing in my future now
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
I feel this. My parents didn’t fully understand what was going on either. Just continue to know that the future is going to be bright. You don’t know when or what will happen, but be positive
- Date posted
- 4y
Me too…😔
- Date posted
- 4y
Ikr I feel the same. I had harm OCD when I was around 10. I was too young to recognise anything. It was went away I continued my school. But ever since I have been at home due to pandemic. I've had like ROCD. HOCD. TOCD and Harm OCD. Out of which hocd and tocd have and are still torturing me. I wish my mom had taken my to some professional 7 years back. My family has still not taken me to a therapist. I also feel I am doomed for life.
- Date posted
- 4y
exactly i was honestly doing okay until this summer and this past week specifically which just harped on every single aspect of my ocd that i’ve experienced, it’s debilitating
- Date posted
- 4y
@Xxara We're all on the same boat. We have no other option than to stay strong. Can't wait to see y'all and myself on the other side of this illness where we're finally living our lives happily. Good luck. ❤️
- Date posted
- 4y
I’ve had pretty severe ocd since I was five and I always knew I was overly paranoid and something was up but I didn’t realize it was definitely most likely ocd until I was about 12. I’m planning on going to a therapist this year for the first time and I know if I had gone a long time ago I would be in such a better place.
- Date posted
- 4y
exactly! looking back i was showing signs of severe ocd when i was like 8-9 but it didn’t start becoming serious until i was about 12 and even then i thought it was anxiety but i could’ve told my family doctor or anyone but i didn’t but i rlly wish i did yk?
- Date posted
- 4y
Sometimes I feel the same. But I then remind myself that I was doing the best that I could at the time…
- Date posted
- 4y
yup ur right. it’s just sad bc i could’ve prevented so much if i had gotten better help at that age
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
WHY is it so bad?? who was gonna tell me 16 was just DREAD, my ocd has flared up worse than ever and i can’t go to therapy weekly anymore. im getting worse and i can’t do it. I just want to give up.
- Date posted
- 22w
i’ve been dealing with SOCD for 5 years and truly believe it has altered my life completely😀. i haven’t been properly diagnosed but the child therapist I had when i was in hs kind of hinted to me i had something more than just plain anxiety. i’ve also dealt with intrusive thoughts all throughout my childhood and as my family life got worse my anxiety got worse annnd i started getting more and more thoughts that wouldn’t leave me. I remember spending months not swallowing right and practically starving myself bc i kept thinking i was going to choke. i also rmbr spending months worrying ab death and dying EVERYDAY. it woke up with horrible anxiety and it was all i could think about. i can still rmbr sitting in my grandpas chair and just staring off and thinking “im going to die one day” “idk what’s going to happen” “is god real” “i don’t want to die” “what if there is no heaven” and so on. when the socd thoughts started i was 15. i searched around online for help and found reddit and i was like “omg yes finally people who understand and are going through EXACTLY what im going through.” finding that community and this app has helped me so much. anyway i had such a horrible time during my teenage years bc of all the intrusive thoughts about my sexuality, my relationship (glad that’s over), and some other things here and there. i was so so depressed and i felt no one around me understood how fucking awful i felt. i woke up everyday anxious, depressed, numb, and exhausted. when i started college i told my old therapist that even tho im extremely afraid of death i just didnt like living. i would cry in my car before class and just sob ab how awful i felt. although my mental health has gotten SO much better as time went on and the thoughts haven’t been as frequent im definitely not doing well. i am literally stuck. i’m still in college but i don’t know what to do with myself. those years of anxiety and depression have left me STUCK. im so much happier? and i can manage the thoughts way better but i don’t want to do anything. i only talk to 2 friends (literally lost so many great friendships), i RARELY drive bc im afraid ill die in a car crash (only to school and back), i don’t go out, i don’t ask for help at school, i avoid conversations, i avoid ppl in general, i don’t put in that much effort into school, i don’t have hobbies, i don’t want to do anything, i literally have the worst social anxiety now, im afraid of everything. i feel like the only reason im “ok” now is bc i’ve avoided literally everything. i’ve basically spent three years of my life doing nothing. i’m not happy with where i am in my life but im so scared to do anything. i miss who i was before all of this. i’ve been dealing with anxiety all my life and ik my childhood and early teen years made me like this. i didn’t know how to deal with the things i went through/saw as a little kid and i guess everything exploded in my teen years. but i want to be better i want to start LIVING. i’m definitely happier than before but im not living. what frustrates me is i refuse to do anything about it. i know a big reason why i don’t experience as many intrusive thoughts is bc i avoid everything 😭. ik what i have to do to get better and turn my life around BUT I WONT DO ANYTHING. idk how to explain this but its not laziness i feel like my body is exhausted. i think im just so traumatized from feeling so fucking horrible for so many years i just shut down ykwim?? i don’t have any libido, i don’t find ppl attractive, i can’t get myself to do the things im interested in (so many books r piled on my floor), i rot all day, i push off my responsibilities till the last minute, i can’t even get myself to go on a small walk. i don’t know where i was going w this but if someone who’s going through the same thing sees this ur not alone. i just needed to get this out. hopefully one day things will get better.
- Date posted
- 19w
do y’all ever look back at memories from your camera roll and come across the time in your life when things were really bad? because when i do, i just feel so sad for the mental state i was drowning in. not that i’m not still, but i have more perspective on it so i’m able to manage it more. but a couple years ago, i rarely left my bed because of how depressed i had gotten. what’s worse is during that time, i had wished that i wanted to unalive myself. but there was never a point when i did want to so it made me upset because i had no way out if i couldn’t handle it anymore. however, i think that’s a blessing in disguise because i was thankfully able to get out of that dark period. i’m still experiencing terrible anxiety, but because i have those times to reflect on and remember i made it through, it’s motivating.
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