I wonder if I am crazy now or if I'm a psychopath :/ I was struggling with depersonalization/derealization then I saw someone's post on NOCD here and I'm like what I become like them and I all my anxiety disappeared and I feel as if my depersonalization/derealization isn't here anymore.. Why don't these thoughts give me anxiety like existential ocd! I hope I never do these thoughts. I hope I never hurt anyone or myself! It also feels as if I'm faking my emotions I cry then I'll take off my tears and try to fix my face :/ I can't tell if my dp/dr is Still here or gone

Austin1121

Date posted: 4y

First off, the best treatment for DRDP is to recognize and accept the sensations. Second, please know that the thoughts you are experiencing are not you. If you were actually a psychopath or criminal, you wouldn't experience worry about the thoughts. They'd be normal to your mind, and you wouldn't be on this app or even doubting them. In fact, I can guarantee that you won't do anything your mind is thinking. If you want to talk more, please let me know. I'm going through something similar. But we're all fighting the good fight together.

Mayte

Date posted: 4y

Sometimes I wish I didn't have arms or hands because I worry I'll lose control because of how real the sensation or feeling on my hand feels... I literally didn't have these harm thoughts this week because of my existential ocd thoughts! Harm thoughts don't hit me as hard as existential ocd.. And I wish It did give me a lot of anxiety Im afraid these thoughts will become normal or Im afraid my mind will make a plan to hurt others I don't want too ah! Let's keep fighting!

Austin1121

Date posted: 4y

@Mayte Btw, here's a very useful article that made me feel a bit better. I'm not sure if NOCD allows links, but here it is: https://adaa.org/learn-from-us/from-the-experts/blog-posts/consumer/overcoming-harm-ocd

Austin1121

Date posted: 4y

Well, the best thing for you to do is recognize that this is ***your OCD trying to occupy your life*** I know how hard it is to think you're normal, but please know that this isn't an indicator that you're nuts. Some of the thoughts feel so, so real and you may think you want to do it. But again, if you were actually considering doing something terrible, you wouldn't be on this app or be worried about it.

Mayte

Date posted: 4y

Thank you so much for the link! I read almost everything and realized I do those rituals 😅. My mind tells me do it and my heart starts beating fast and I'll sit on my hands to get rid of the feeling and I'll try not to react to the thought. It just worries me how I don't get much anxiety but I understand!

Austin1121

Date posted: 4y

@Mayte So the feelings in your hands is actually anxiety. Anxiety is the overstimulation of your nervous system (i.e. your fight or flight response), which causes a "tingling sensation" throughout various locations of your body. I often thought that sensation meant that I wanted "to do it," bit it's really just your mind and physical body working against you.

Mayte

Date posted: 4y

@Austin1121 Wow I didn't know that! Thank you for letting me know!! I remember when I was small I would get thoughts once in a while to hurt someone at home and I would get really red and intense like my face and I don't think I would wanna do it but I think I would get up and avoid the knife or just sit and wait for it to pass then I would forget! That's what also got me to wonder if I was going crazy now...

Austin1121

Date posted: 4y

@Mayte So you avoiding a potential weapon of harm is one of the benchmarks for Harm OCD. It's a ritual to avoid or hide objects that can be used for violence. Again, if you're to the point of avoiding knives and such, you are absolutely NOT a murderer.

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