- Date posted
- 3y
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Hi ❤ You are important and you are loved. I'm sorry you are struggling right now.
- Date posted
- 3y
Thanks, I Hope everthing gets better soon and I feel better too
- Date posted
- 3y
firstly, i am so sorry about your mom. <3 secondly, i think you being upset is valid because it’s difficult to see new people come into your dads life after your mom. i think it’s important to talk to him about how you feel, communicating is key. also don’t feel like you’ll end up alone, you have no idea what the future holds for you, you could always meet new friends, i use to be the biggest loner & thought the same, but i took a leap of faith & sat with someone in school & know i have a friend group. so don’t lose hope. just because it feels like this now, doesn’t mean it’ll feel like this forever. :) <3
- Date posted
- 3y
*now
- Date posted
- 3y
Its because all this is odd... Odd and strange... All this situation. I am not angry because somewhat he is moving forward on the loss, but also because I am worried about our family. I dont to see my sister and he discussing, almost fighting. And she wants to leave. I even thought about looking for some hotel or room for her to rest, like Airbnb, so she could go with our dog and forget about this a little and I would hold on here alone. I dont to see more fight
- Date posted
- 3y
@Heello it’s not wrong to feel strange because it’s a very new thing & if there is fighting then finding a place to take a step back is a good idea. it’s healthy to create boundaries for your guys’ mental health. you seem like a very understanding, caring sibling to want to do that for your sister too, but remember to also prioritize your own boundaries. i wish the best for you!
- Date posted
- 3y
Oh I'm so sorry to hear that :( I know it must be incredibly hard. But in the other hand you could also review how you feel towards your dad. It must have been equally as hard for him as for you guys. And sometimes finding someone new is the best step in recovering. Maybe you could try to feel happy for him, which isn't easy. But maybe it's best for him to move on, having someone new doesn't mean he never loved your mother. It's just means he is trying to cope. Probably speaking to him would help a lot!
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes I understand. Of all persons I know I cant judge him or be angry. I just want ouro family, me, my sister and him to be able to live in harmony at least. I feeling a little better right know, cause I was also feeling guilty. I will try to talk with my psychiatrist as soon as possible too
- Date posted
- 3y
I'm sorry to hear about your mom. My mom passed last October and it's been tough. I know how it feels to not have friends or feel like you have no one to talk to. I don't know if you believe in God or not or have a relationship with him but I know that God is a present help in times of trouble. He is the one who can bear our burdens when we can't. He is someone who you can always call on without him judging you. God loves you and he will never leave you or forsake you. He has been my strength since my mom passed. I have my moments when I grieve but if you believe in him he will see you through
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w
I’ve shared on here before that I don’t have the best relationship with my parents but I still care for them a lot. I love them. This disorder has been so debilitating for the last 4 months. It keeps getting worse. It’s been attacking any physical contact with my parents. Any touches, hugs, playful jabs, caresses, anything. Anything that’s supposed to be pure and loving. My brain jumps to it being inappropriate, or weird or just comparing it to something sexual. Then I just feel so uncomfortable. I don’t know if I’m just hyperaware of how I feel, I tense up badly or if I’m checking how I feel. I don’t know. It breaks my heart. It genuinely hurts so bad. I feel like a child who just wants to cry in her parents’ arms but OCD is trying to take them away. This feels so painful, I’ve been dealing with so many themes but this specific situation hurts the most. I feel devastated and scared. If anyone else has been through this or has any advice, I’d really appreciate it. And if not, just knowing that someone heard me would mean a lot. I feel so deeply sad.
- POCD
- "Pure" OCD
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- Relationship OCD
- Older adults with OCD
- Young adults with OCD
- OCD newbies
- Harm OCD
- Date posted
- 19w
Hi, I'm 17,about to be 18. I've been struggling with these thoughts for the past 8 months. I was wondering if someone experienced ever the same because I feel im "different". BACKGROUND: (I'm not diagnosed with Ocd but seeing a local counselor) About 9 months ago I cheated on my boyfriend with this guy S (who blackmailed, manipulated and molested me). Since then when I realized that what i did was very WRONG and so I started ruminating picking apart every single interaction and telling my boyfriend, i tried to remember every single detail because otherwise I felt like i was being a fraud and hiding things to save myself, i had many crisis about it because I had also what i think was false memory ocd. My boyfriend forgave me idk how tbh I still wonder. CURRENT STRUGGLE: Months ago I was sure I didn't wanna S in any way and i was sure even when everything happened. For the past 2 months tho I've been having thoughts like " Do I love S?" "I love S" "S is hot" "Would S find me hot?" "What if I want S?" " What if I don't love my boyfriend enough?" "What if I secretly want S?" "What if I see my boyfriend as a friend only?Do I?" And I tried testing my reaction to intimate scenarios with S, I'm scared I like it i dont really wanna love S or have any secret attraction, I wish I didn't have any of this and I want to be sure of my feelings for my boyfriend because I know I wanna be with him and I see a future with him like he brings me comfort. But a part of me keeps trying to convince me otherwise. Sometimes I think I'd rather die than have these thoughts. Im so scared of not being able to control my feelings, im scared I can't resist S and its giving me anxiety and making me cry. Sometimes when i think of those sexual scenarios with S or I get those thoughts my mind tells me to smile because i like it because I find it funny. It makes me doubt myself all over again. Like I'm always like I need to test if I'd feel aroused to intimate scenarios with S, lately im trying to fight this urge to test and test but my mind is like "just do it this once so you can be sure. I can never watch anything romantic or sexual or whatever because my mind would be like "you and S" or sometimes I'm just enjoying time with my bf and im like " yes we can just have a sneaky cheating thing thats ok" and it makes me want to figure it out to find an answer a solution because idk it just does like I need to find the meaning of it if it means the truth and all. Im worried im just an awful person and these thoughts just ruin my quality of life . Today i had a crisis where i ended up doinf swlf harm, I'm so scared of finding someone that's not my boyfriend desirable or sexual appealing or whatever it is, I also have bodily reactions when I try to imagine and test my reaction to scenarios. Now i keep groing everytime and I dont know why but i have this sensation and I dont want to havebit especially when its something S related. Does someone experience the same thoughts? Am I alone in this? Is this ROCD? What should i do?
- Date posted
- 10w
TW- POCD people only please. Am I a criminal hiding behind a diagnosis? I woke up in the middle of the night breathing and I was having groinals because she laying across me. My mind told me I had already hurt her so might as well do something else. I then was like well I have nothing to lose and I had to think of what to do. The only thing I could think to do was move my elbow towards her groin area to cause a feeling. Well I did that and my elbow touched her groin and caused an unwanted feeling. I then immediately asked my child to move. After that, I went back to sleep but I believe in a state of shock as to what happened. I woke up panicking completely thinking I have done ruined my life. I was going to prison and would lose my child. Since then, I haven't stopped ruminating. I have had days where I feel okay, but then there are days where I can't stop crying. Thinking I don't deserve my child, and I deserve to be in the ground. I was on a new medication that was causing me to spiral and giving me insomnia during this time. I wasn't getting much sleep at all. Since then, I've slept on the floor, and I eventually got my child to sleep in their own bed to avoid this happening again. I got off the medication and feel so much better with my thoughts and sleeping so much better. My daughter tells me how wonderful I am often, but I don't feel that I even deserve to celebrate Mother's Day this year. I'm not a good mom. I was four months ago before I spiraled. What's wrong with me? (edited)
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