Does anyone else feel like they HAVE to put on makeup or perfect their outfit and stuff to go out, even just to the gym or for family to see you? It causes me problems with me being late and causing others issues when I’m late. I know realistically nobody cares what I look like but I can’t stop and it makes me feel like a narcissist (my ocd theme) :/ I’ve been like this since I was little ugh

this is random but i have slightly wavy hair 🧍‍♀️but i straighten it before school every single day, and if i dont- i will NOT go. I dont even hate my natural hair and i go out with it all the time in places that arent school- but SCHOOL. I physically will not enter the school if i have not straightened my hair… and if i mid day in school see that my hair has even one wave or slight frizziness i feel this whack of anxiety and suddenly i cant breathe i wanna leave and go home. Just now my dad told me id have to walk to school tomorrow- I CANT do that. Walking after school is fine like idc if my hair gets frizzy after school… but TO school- no… like it genuinely triggers such intense anxiety in me and i cant walk to school because i convince myself (bc its pretty much true) that if i walk to school with my straightened hair its going to get all wavy and frizzy and the thought of going to school like that makes me physically unable to breathe. Idk if this is a compulsion or not.

This obsession is new, but feels so much more grounded and it’s so anxiety inducing. Since the ocd started I’ve lost my sense of self and confidence. I got soocd and it slowly turned into be doubting my identity on whether I want to identify or dress masculine or feminine. I don’t feel good in the clothes I would typically wear out before I’m constantly overanalyzing how I’m feeling , it makes me really anxious and like I’m preforming. So then I started doubting if I would rather dress masculine and it’s extremely anxiety inducing and idk if it’s the ocd now but it feels like that’s how I want to dress.. that’s not what I associated with at all before the ocd but now it feels like that’s what would make me feel fully confident and loose in the world, does anyone else experience this??

I never heard about people with OCD who have messy living conditions. Maybe this is why it took so long to accept my diagnosis. Although I really dont like how OCD is percieved at by the majority of people, I feel like Im weird or something because I dont fit into that stereotype. I understand that a lot of people with OCD have this issue, but why do I feel so different? If anybody else has/had this belief, what helps with feeling more comfortable? Everytime my mom points out my room, and how its messy- Its like I feel so lazy and useless. So then I often plan out everything I was going to do, step by step, always having a reasoning behind everything, because logic always comforts me. When I start tidying up my room, I go full out (Sheets, Laundry, Clorox, Candles, Vaccuming, Then I start going through the guinea pigs cage to rearranging all of their stuff) Yet always somewhere after doing a few things, I start feeling disgusting and almost shameful of myself. 99% of the time I end up laying on my floor sobbing, noting every little thing about my room. How my furiniture doesnt match, how i would rather have solid floor like hardwood or vinyl instead of the carpet, usually things i cant change… and then barely anything gets done in my room. I start to have a meltdown and often dont take care of myself even more afterwards. A piece of me feels like my thoughts are just me being a spoiled brat and wanting everything i dont have- meanwhile others dont even have a roof over their head. The other piece of me is just tired, just emotionally exaughsted. Please comment any thoughts or recomendations to maybe improve motovation and attitude towards doing long tasks.