I relapsed so bad yesterday after about a month of feeling like myself again, now I'm convinced I'm trans. It's so annoying I just want to be a girl again. What do you do when you relapse? How do you prevent it?

I've been really overwhelmed with thoughts of detransitioning even though I don't want to like thinking I'm not a boy. It's been making my anxiety go up like crazy but I've never had this problem this much before, and I've always felt so proud of who I was and stuff but I don't know why this is coming up all of a sudden and I'm scared. I don't want to detransition but these thoughts won't go away. I often have feminine interests and have been trying to get into a better mindset and I feel like those things are making me feel more feminine and I don't want to feel that way.

I'm new to NOCD, but not new to my own OCD journey. I was diagnosed in 2017 and usually experience relationship obsessions. Medication helped me tremendously and I was able to tackle and overcome the anxiety I felt when my husband and I first got together. Fast forward to now. My best friend has decided to casually enter the dating world again and that terrifies me. The fact that it scared me triggered an HOCD spiral, that I think I've now gotten myself out of. I just feel pathetic for being so fearful that my friend is going to realize she's too good for me and leave me behind once she has a partner. I know this likely stems from my own feelings of inadequacy and low self esteem, but my OCD has latched itself to this fear and I've been catching myself falling into old habits that I thought I'd overcome. I don't want to be living under the cloud again. Just looking for some encouragement or someone else who understands what this feels like.

anyone else have a good evening/ day then fall back down hurrendously the next day? Honestly yesterday I felt great! Like I knew what I like (opposite gender) and these ‘false attractions’ are just false alarms caused by OCD… like I knew these thoughts and feeling are OCD. Today I question it all over again. Are these false attractions real? Why has my loss of opposite attraction feel like it won’t return? Though yesterday I got snippets.