Just had an anxiety attack from thinking my boyfriends family is crazy. His sister is vile to me most of the time and I just had a random rush of anxiety and started crying, and heavy breathing. I wanna go home from work so bad. Last week I wanted to marry him and now this week I’m scared and wondering if I should dump him He’s so nice But I fear somethings deeply wrong and I don’t know why. And I almost collapsed at work. About to ask to go home.

Lately, I’ve been struggling with feelings that I might be sabotaging myself in my relationship. By sabotage, I mean that I find it hard to stop engaging in compulsions, like seeking reassurance or overanalyzing my thoughts. I also sometimes behave badly with my boyfriend, and the intrusive thoughts I have can completely change my mood. I love my boyfriend—he’s such a good, beautiful, and wonderful person—but I’m afraid these thoughts are going to ruin things. I truly want to love him, but I’m scared. I know the thoughts are anxiety-driven, but they still make me question if I’m forcing myself to stay with him. Today, for example, I felt okay earlier, but when he called me on video, I suddenly felt like I didn’t feel anything, and I started thinking I don’t like how he looks. These thoughts hit me like a wave, and I panicked. Usually, I find him very attractive, but when these thoughts come, I feel sad and disconnected. What’s confusing is that I also have many moments—like today and in the past few days—where I’ve felt really good and I’ve felt love for him. I feel awful writing this because my boyfriend doesn’t deserve this, and I feel like I’m posting out of habit. It makes me scared that I don’t want to accept the truth, even though I know I care about him. I hate feeling this way because it feels like I’m betraying him by having these thoughts and posting them. Has anyone else dealt with these feelings of sabotaging their relationship or feeling like they’re forcing themselves to stay? How do you cope when the thoughts feel like they’re true, and how do you work through the fear of letting go of anxiety

I can’t stop crying. My thoughts are going insane, they’re so fast I can’t keep up. I want to tell everyone around me what’s happening (my family doesn’t even know about my OCD). I can’t seem to resist compulsions today. I’m freaking out. I want to give up. I feel like I’m suffocating in whatever is going on. I feel like I need to go to a hospital. I don’t know how to ask for help. I don’t feel okay. I don’t understand this at all. It feels like I took some random drug. I’m really scared I’m sorry, I am so panicked. It’s embarrassing but I feel so desperate for help right now I feel crazy

i’m currently experiencing a panicky anxiety attack and i don’t know why. i’ve been on edge all day because of being scared to get sick, but right now, i know i’m not going to get sick but i’m just really panicked and cannot calm down. i’m currently listening to music that helps relax me with an icepack on my neck to help, but not much is happening. my sister and mom keep coming into my room and it’s only making it worse but i don’t know why. i just don’t want to talk or be around anyone right now. these kinds of episodes are worse than any other because i don’t know why i’m so scared. it just feels like it’s never going to go away.