This Pandemic.... starting to feel like a lonely world like my own lilttle bubble. All of these intrusive thoughts are a waste of time and none of its useful.

So over all of this. Why do periods have to make everything so much worse. I keep thinking that I can get over an intrusive thought and then the next one comes in. My brain tries to make be obsess over something that i've already obsessed about and moved on from. Wish this could be over.

OCD can be so isolating. I’m in a health anxiety spiral and struggling at work. I feel like I am failing everywhere and feeling very alone. My support system is tired of hearing about my fears, health wise and work wise. I find myself crying a lot. I don’t particularly enjoy doing anything anymore. I feel like I just can’t get comfortable in my skin or my head sometimes. I’m not sure how to else to describe it. Like nothing soothes me or makes it better. Even sleep is bad dreams and waking up anxious all night. I’ve always felt different from everyone else but when I’m on meds I can fake it better and I feel more connected. I want to go back on SSRI’s but I’ve been dealing with health issues and the meds exacerbate them so am delaying for the time being

I’m stuck in a loop, I can’t stop avoiding the thoughts by watching tik tok, I’m paralyzed on the couch, I’m searching for clues everywhere that something bad is happening I don’t know how to go on like this anymore my fears are so strong so present they feel so real. Any mention of the future sends my whole body into panic. My arms go numb, I can’t keep living like this i feel like I’m going crazy