why are the intrusive images so gross & disturbing i am so tired of this :(

ikr😭😭 whenever i get the absolutely awful images in my head i try to think of something happy which is for some reason hard to come up with on the spot but my therapist says to think of your happy place and i love to ice skate so i just imagine the sounds of the blades on the ice. thinking of the sounds and smells of my happy place is easier than visualizing it to me bc if i’m visualizing i always end up making it into something bad