- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I’m feeling like that today too. :( I’m at the point where I don’t even think I can differentiate myself anymore (most days at least)
- Date posted
- 4y
It feels like such a loss of identity
- Date posted
- 4y
@LizardLady95 How old are you
- Date posted
- 4y
@Jermainesmom I’m in my 20’s
- Date posted
- 4y
I know what you mean. It’s fucking tired some.
- Date posted
- 4y
I think a lot of times intrusive OCD thoughts try to make you do something. If your thoughts are telling you that you have to do something or else something bad will happen, then those are probably OCD thoughts. At least that's how it is for me.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
I honestly can’t tell when thoughts are being affected by OCD. Sometimes I think I have what I think are normal “grey” thoughts, but then OCD adds so much weight to them and I spiral. I had this thought that I wished my boyfriend was more confident or independent. I felt so guilty for thinking it. I told him, and of course it hurt him. He told me it’s a normal thought to have, I just dwell on it too much. And that it’s the kind of thought most people keep to themselves. That’s the thing. I don’t know what’s okay to keep to myself and what isn’t. I think sometimes I say things out loud not just to relieve anxiety, but because I genuinely don’t know what’s okay to think or say. I do not know the line between a normal grey thought and something that’s “bad” to think. I don’t know how to tell if it’s something I should process privately or something I need to be ashamed of. I get this confusion with intrusive thoughts too, but those are easier to spot and evaluate. This is harder, because again, it is *my* thought. That makes it harder to sit with. Maybe the intrusive part is the voice that questions what kind of person I am for even thinking it. I don’t have the same telltale signs anymore. My physical anxiety isn’t there anymore, it’s all in my head and that makes it so much more confusing. But I don’t know. The line between honesty vs compulsion is so blurry. I just feel lost
- Harm OCD
- "Pure" OCD
- Students with OCD
- BIPOC with OCD
- Young adults with OCD
- Religion & Spirituality OCD
- OCD newbies
- Relationship OCD
- Date posted
- 21w
It is not the thoughts or urges that scare me anymore. It is the way I feel like I’ve absorbed the compulsions into my identity :( I am doing them so automatically that it feels like I am choosing them freely and they’re me. and because of that, it feels like I AM the OCD now, not just someone with OCD. I think I’m just deeply trapped in a loop. I was trying to survive unbearable fear so I started scanning. Then I started pre-scanning. Then checking if I pre-scanned. Then I check how I feel during all that. I run to beat my OCD to the “punchline” (intrusive thought, urge, sensation) because I’m so scared all the time. So scared that I don’t even feel it anymore. I feel numb and all that’s left is this jittery residue and numbness. Now it’s all tangled together in a huge knot. I feel so extremely lost. I think this may just be meta OCD, but I’ve never ever felt so gone before :( I’m really scared.
- Real Events OCD
- Young adults with OCD
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- Religion & Spirituality OCD
- BIPOC with OCD
- Students with OCD
- POCD
- Harm OCD
- Date posted
- 19w
I used to be able to determine what was my OCD and what’s real life but now it’s all just blending together. I literally can’t tell what’s true between what’s not true. my overthinking is absolutely terrible and rituals and everything is just crumbling.
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