literally feeling like a P for no reason . I get thoughts say “I want to be a P” but why ? Why would I get a thought that I want to be attracted to kids when I know in my soul I am not . Can anyone help , this really brings me down , & causes me frustration

cmaria

Date posted: 4y

This has helped me, knowing that: OCD thoughts are ego-dystonic i.e. inconsistent with a person's values. The reason you are worried is because you care so much about not feeling this way, because it is so the opposite of your character, and that's how it gets to you.

hunty

Date posted: 4y

So what can I do? Just ignore the thought and live my life? This thought really bugs me! I have a husband, whom I love so much. I’m really even thinking of going on meds :(

cmaria

Date posted: 4y

know that SO many people have these thoughts, but people without OCD (me once!) can have them as fleeting thoughts and not pay any attention to them. with OCD we can't ignore them, but we can slowly learn to see them as normal and not anything to be afraid of. talking helps normalise SO much. I have told my partner about thinking these exact things too and thought it was the worst thing in the world, but it didn't even phase him. if you feel ready to talk to your partner you can do it alongside showing him material on OCD so he can understand it is all part of OCD and not you as a person. I'm considering going back on meds, they helped me so much and shouldn't be looked down on!

hunty

Date posted: 4y

You’ve had a thought like “i want to be _____” ? like its so weird , if I wanted to be I’d just be out there engaging in pedophilic behaviors right ? :/ Its so weird , last night I was having very saddening & inappropriate thoughts of my baby niece & nephews that I did not enjoy at all . I already have enough shame with POCD , why would I really want to be one …. I even want to take a polygraph to challenge this thought lol my judgment is so clouded . I tell myself I don’t want to identify as p like weirdos do & my mind says yes :/ I’m literally reaching out for so much help , meds , residential programs . Because I know once you are in that world its so hard to even consider getting out . I don’t want a life of shame & guilt . I’m sorry to go on , but I could really use help

Anonymous:,(

Date posted: 4y

@;-; I feel you last night I woke up with anxiety and my mind was trying to convince me I only want to be kids and that I am p word. I didn’t get much sleep and I’m so tired. I’m terrified to have sex or anything like that because my pocd latched on to my little sister and brother and I just get disturbing thoughts and I’m really terrified of me doing something

hunty

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous🤷🏽‍♀️ This theme is the worst!!!!!

cmaria

Date posted: 4y

I would definitely look into therapy and meds if you think it's necessary. I am in a similar boat. I've had thoughts of what if I would do something to a child, what if I am a P and how can I ever have kids? I think it's come up cos I'm getting nearer to an age I might want to have kids, whereas I never had it before and have always been fine and loved being around kids, and obvs I still am but I have this niggling OCD sometimes. It is not you, know that, it is the opposite of you, and there is help out there.

hunty

Date posted: 4y

I’ve already finished my therapy with OCD , here on NOCD . & have tools to overcome this theme . But this thought alone is killing me & I’ve made an appointment for meds , I definitely want my life back . OCD just doesn’t want to let go of me

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond