Thread
Mayte
8d ago

Every girl I come across seeing I feel like I have to say they're pretty/hot/or cute and I say to myself why can't I say hot/cute/handsome to everyguy I see! I just wanna like guys but it feels impossible. Last night I was thinking of a guy and how he's coming back already and then I fell asleep and he came out in my dream and I got up happy but it feels like me liking guys is fake and I truly don't like them but I do wanna like just men.

Orange-Colored_Glasses
8d ago
You can’t control your thoughts. Trying to force yourself to have specific thoughts about guys is not going to help your SOOCD. Work on letting whatever thoughts you have just be there. Don’t analyze them. If you do accidentally analyze your thoughts, spoil the compulsion by saying something like “actually, I might be wrong, I’m really not sure.” It might feel like hell, but it’s the only way out of the OCD trap!
John-Paul
8d ago
Nowadays we worry so much about feelings even though they mean absolutely nothing when it comes to facts. We all have feelings that we don’t want. Just because we have them doesn’t mean they are reality or we have to act out on them.
_maddie_
8d ago
hey babe! your local godmother gay is here! you cant control your sexuality. you like what you like! there's nothing wrong with being into girls and if liking guys feels fake to you, that's fine! you don't need to comply to heteronormativity <3
John-Paul
8d ago
I’m saying that she doesn’t have to give into the idea that because you feel something that makes it true. We have all been given the free will to make choices. If she wants to date a guy then she can.
_maddie_
7d ago
@John-Paul absolutely but she doesn't need to force herself to date a guy if she doesn't want to
Orange-Colored_Glasses
7d ago
@_maddie_ 100%! It sounds to me like what OP is dealing with here is SOOCD, not internalized homophobia, but of course in any case it’s important for her to see queer relationships as being just as good and valid as straight ones.
John-Paul
8d ago
If you feel angry at someone that doesn’t make it ok to kill them. If you feel like doing something that doesn’t make it true.