I been thinking about my POCD and I will never have kids. I feel like breaking up with my boyfriend so he can have a girlfriend who isn’t sure she isn’t a p word or not. I just look at kids and I have guilt that I have these disgusting thoughts. I want him to be happy and be with someone who isnt mentally ill and doesn’t have thoughts about assault or children. I’m scared to tell him because it’s almost his birthday and I don’t want to ruin that for him. I feel like being alone forever. It sucks bc before this I knew I wanted to be with him forever and have kids but now I can’t even have that. And I’m unsure if I want to be with him at all. It’s just so hard

PanikinSkywa...

Date posted: 4y

Just give it time. Have you even tried any type of therapy yet? I felt the same way before therapy and now my outlook has changed and I'm thinking that I may want children in the future. There is hope, I know you can't see that right now with the OCD goggles on but it does get better!

Anonymous:,(

Date posted: 4y

No I’m going to start ERP and I’m scared it might not work and I actually am a p and I’m really scared. I’m just super confused. At first I knew now with all the feeling and over analyzing I don’t know anymore and I’m scared and disgusted to even admit it.

PanikinSkywa...

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous🤷🏽‍♀️ I felt the same way. Push through that initial fear and give ERP a shot. You won't regret it! I've mad tons of progress, and I never thought it would help

YHWH1892y

Date posted: 4y

@Anonymous🤷🏽‍♀️ I would accept help. Been there

Anonymous 😐

Date posted: 4y

I brought mine up with my boyfriend and he was super understanding, he understands it’s ocd, understands i can’t help it nor do i want it, and he understand id never do it. if you want to tell your bf go ahead!

Date posted: 4y

For me, I find that doing some breathing exercises and focusing on the breath can be an effective method of re-centering yourself. Sit with your feelings and don’t push away from them. Do not react. Do not attach meaning. Just sit with them and they will dissipate.

[Deleted]

Date posted: 4y

Comment deleted by user

Anonymous:,(

Date posted: 4y

Yeah I know he kinda has an idea. But I’m scared because all of the overthinking and my thoughts are really scary. So I just feel a lot of guilt. I feel like he deserves to be happy and not be with a monster like me

Anonymous:,(

Date posted: 4y

@Robert132 I mean you aren’t wrong but I just can’t seem to find happiness or hope anywhere. Everything in my life is so hard right now

Date posted: 4y

@Robert132 Dude this is very well said. Thanks.

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