How do you get over Real-event OCD and the feeling that you need to self destruct in order to remove the guilt?

All the time I have this

You have to forgive yourself for what happened even if it was your fault and you messed up. Speaking from experience this is easier said than done, but possible.

How do i know i have the right to forgive myself though.

@Anon123 There’s no “right” to forgive yourself. You have to make to choice to do it, or at least want to do it. Even if the person you hurt doesn’t forgive you. A lot of what I’ve learned about forgiveness comes from Tara Brach and her self titled podcast. Episode name: “Part 1 - Forgiving Ourselves and Others from Aversive Blame (2019-04-17)”. It’s hard to explain why it’s okay to forgive ourselves without leaning into some spirituality or deeper meaning in life. I always combat my unforgiveness with reminding myself that what is done is done. I’ve apologized and it is over. If I continue to be tortured by it, I will only give it more power and extend the effect it’s having on my life. Time to move on and learn from it.

Does anyone mind telling me what exactly real event ocd is. I’ve heard different things.

Real event OCD is when something happened and you obsess about the event. For example, a mistake that you made that you feel is terrible, that you should get the death penalty for meanwhile people around you are saying it’s nothing to worry about.

@Anon123 Oh ok. Perfect thank you

That last part was spot on. There's lots of podcasts about self forgiveness on Spotify. 💛