Another imagined scenario at work tonight when washing my hands at the break room sink - every time I finished rinsing my hands, my brain convinced me I had taken them and rubbed them all over the sink. Like cleaning the sink with them in place of a wipe or something. Just over and over. So naturally my response is, oh darn let's wash them again. I was in there forever. This has happened to me when people are in there too and it's so mortifying because I can't stop, and I know people can see me. People waiting to use the sink (or bathroom if I'm in there) makes my compulsions SO much worse. It's just exhausting.

I need advice. I’m constantly washing my hands after going to the bathroom/touching something I find gross, but it doesn’t stop at just washing. I have to keep washing til I feel right (usually 3-4 times). It also isn’t just my hands, I go all the way up my forearms. I know in my head that once is enough. But I can’t kick this repetitive behavior. I know I should just start only washing it once but I don’t know if I can handle the panic that will come after. I need advice/tips if anyone’s gone through something similar what worked for you. Im just sick of this

So, if I'm retelling a story or relaying information to someone, after I'm done speaking, my brain will send me thoughts like, "What if you lied? You might have told the story wrong! You're lying!" I've started second-guessing myself, even when I know I'm not lying or telling the story wrong😭 This has also bled into twisting my intentions behind certain actions... For example, the other day, I'd been babysitting my younger brothers. I'd gone to use the restroom and thought, "What if the door isn't locked or closed all the way?" Because this has happened once in the past. Turns out, it didn't lock correctly, and one of my little brothers almost walked in on me, but luckily, I shut the door in time, and we laughed it off. But then, I kept getting thoughts like, "You knew that would happen, and you didn't double-check! You wanted that to happen and for him to walk in!" :( I know this isn't true, but it's so annoying! Has anyone dealt with this? If you have, do you have any advice on how to deal with these thoughts?

Does anyone imagine they are doing their harm thoughts during an action, making you feel like you acted on your thoughts? For example, someone gave me a hug and at the last second I imagined I was touching something I shouldn’t during the hug? I want to make it clear it’s something I have zero desire to do! But the problem is, I thought it on purpose and it makes me sick !! Obviously nothing happened but my mind is telling me that was me trying to do it. Even though it was physically impossible to do. Am I a monster or could this be OCD? I’m freaking out and don’t want to be here anymore. I feel like I’m the exception and that this isn’t OCD. I know I post about this stuff a lot but I’m struggling and don’t know what to do.