I always feel ignored. I can’t tell if I’m just paranoid and overthinking or if there’s something about me that’s unpleasant to others.

Everyone is frustrating me at work and I’m about to crash out😭!! Maybe it’s how I grew up and have been gaslit a lot but does anyone ever feel like whatever they do they are in the “wrong?” I don’t know …my coworker made me feel like that. What’s wrong to her might not be wrong to me and vise versa. I just wanna scream and throw hands lol. I don’t know if anyone else feels like this. And they wanna have this conversation in front of customers and then I look like the “bad guy” 🙄. So over it. Workplace is toxic asf and I’m trying to find a new job but it seems impossible these days . I feel like I’m not the best at conversations on the spot. That’s why I keep quiet so ion look dumb, but both coworkers came up to me and approach me. I feel like I try and smile and nobody really smiles back. Or when I say thank you and go to places like ulta, all the girls are bitchy. It makes me think am I not smiling enough? Am I doing something wrong? Etc. Maybe it just the people I’m around . I just feel nothing but anger and I’m trying to calm down but I really just wanna go off

Paranoia… I need to know because I’m feeling very alone in this. I’ve never met someone with the level of paranoia that I have. I can logically explain things to myself and somehow my paranoia convinces me of another story. I’m constantly thinking exaggerated thoughts that there are so many scary possibilities. Am I alone in this or what? If so any suggestions on how to calm these thoughts

Mann this isn't any ocd problems but like I feel like some of my friends just ignores me or like I know they like me but they just don't interact me back and they block me then unblock me and never followed me back am I too annoying for them or am I just this annoying for my whole life I mean I made it my whole persona I do jokes i make them laugh but I feel like its not enough of them I'm already crying can someone comfort me ...