Hi, I’m new to NOCD. I am a mom of 3 and currently pregnant with my fourth child, due in June. I’ve had OCD has long as I can remember. I was not formally diagnosed until I was in my 20s. I’ve taken Zoloft on and off for decades. I normally quit the meds because I go a period of time feeling “normal” and “human” and feel like I’m fully recovered until it strikes again unexpectedly. Most recently, it’s hit hard with my current pregnancy. I fear “contamination” even though I know no one will be harmed. Touching dirty things, inadvertently smelling things in the air (ie. Gasoline at a station), tracking things inside on shoes (although we take our shoes off at the door), seeing pesticides being applied etc all cause me to get anxious and feel contaminated. I get trapped in my own mind and feel like I miss many times with my children for lack of being present. I have a difficult time believing this is OCD and not a rational thought. I would love to meet others who have similar stories and/or suffered during pregnancy as well. Thank you for letting me share my story. I don’t normally open up for fear of judgement.

Shoes shoes shoes oh how I hate them. They are one of the biggest triggers for me. I cannot get over them. Smelling things in the air is a big one for me also, but not with gasoline specifically. Pregnancy had hit me really hard also. I'm a mom and constantly worry for my child (1.5 years old), thinking I might do something to contaminate her. I also have a hard time being present with family because I'm lost in my own head most of the time.

My OCD has been pretty quiet for over a year and only upon getting pregnant has it reared its ugly head and the thoughts are just as scary even though I should know better by now. Anything I can do to help let me know :)

I may not completely understand where you're coming from, given I have never had a kid, but I'm proud of you for opening up! I can't imagine how difficult and stressed you must feel, especially with kids.

Ocdmom80, did you have general anxiety issues too ?

I understand

Yes I have here on NOCD. I've suffered with it for many years though before reaching out for help. I reached out for help in an attempt to make my life easier to live. I'm working on it with a therapist now, let's see.

What brought me to NOCD was the fact that I don't have to leave the house. Leaving the house is quite difficult for me.

Did it start after giving birth?

Thank you Don't say you should know better, it's okay. It changes the ways it gets under the skin, that's okay you'll fight it off again.