Is it normal my OCD fear thoughts come back in my dreams/ REM sleep at night? It makes me even worse the next day...

Anyone else just have days where they feel more calm and don’t have as many intrusive thoughts? But then later at night time it just comes back so you only had relief even for a little bit 😞😞 I feel like even when I’m not having my OCD send me intrusive thoughts, I always have a feeling in my stomach that something is wrong/off or a sense of doom. I always just feel on edge and anxious as if my mind is always preparing itself for the next horrifying intrusive thought to torment me with ugh 🫠

Whenever anyone starts to feel like their thoughts are less triggering or they feel a moment of happiness/ relief OCD tells you that you want the thoughts back or you actually like having the thoughts and maybe thats just the person I really am? I feel like im going insane😢

I had a really bad nightmare revolving around one of my big themes and I woke up with the panic still left over the dream as if it was real and I kept thinking about the situations. I tried to tell myself it was just a dream, but then it made me question real life. So then it was a cycle of ruminating about the events as though they were real and my reality which really messed me up bc my biggest theme right now is becoming schizophrenic/catatonic/"crazy." I feel stuck in a loop, I've tried saying the "maybes" and even talking to my partner about other things but it just keeps looping in my head "am I crazy?" "I can't differentiate between dreams" "I feel like I'm stuck in my head and I can't even talk". Any tips? I feel like I'm at the crescendo of my 20 years (lifelong) ocd due to stress from moving soon.