- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
ocd, in my understanding, is common to cause dissociation/derealization which can make reality feel different and amplify fears that theyve lost touch or gone "crazy". ive heard dissociation can even be a compulsion. also, concern about experiencing psychosis or schizophrenia is not an unheard of obsession. but i can say, doubting whether your experience of reality is accurate or not is a painful pit of despair. but the fear comes and goes like the wind if we let it pass through us. this what im working in but its really difficult
- Date posted
- 3y
Does this also mean like doing something you don’t want to do? Or feeling like your actions aren’t your own?
- Date posted
- 3y
like you feel like you want to do something, you do it, and then wonder why you did it because it wasn’t right? Idk if that makes sense
- Date posted
- 3y
@Plaisie i actually have this same question. ive had urges to do wrong things, and i didnt want to do them, but the thought (which in this case was about doing drugs) would not leave me and i didnt know about ocd. i knew about intrusive thoughts, but not that much. my therapist at the time didnt catch that i had ocd and tried to convince me i wasnt addicted. he didnt understand the intensity of the urge and dismissed it as a baseless anxiety. so it didnt help. i would start thinking that maybe if i tried a drug my urge would go away-- thats how addiction works right? (thats what i thought)-- even though it gave me really intense anxiety and was counter intuitive. i was desperate, the thought was excruciating and the only action that my body was telling me i could do (if i was indeed an addict) was take the drug. it confuses me because they say in ocd you are afraid of doing things but wouldnt actually do them. and then i did do it (all the while physically trembling with anxiety and selfloathing, heart racing, muggy palms, not enjoying the drug one little bit) and yet i acted on it. i was, in an odd tangle of obsession and compulsion, doing a drug so that i would stop feeling like i needed to do a drug. but it didnt work longterm and the thoughts returned after awhile. ive been afraid to tell anyone but now understanding ocd i know the urge was not because im an addict, and i feel comfortable bringing it up with a doctor (i have since switched therapists). thats my little story. hopefully you will feel that you arent the only one. ❤️
- Date posted
- 3y
@Manz Ohhhhhhhh…..I had that the other day where I felt like I was trying to find underage pornography on YouTube. Obviously I didn’t find any but it just felt wrong the whole time, like I hated doing it but was tired of hearing my thoughts
- Date posted
- 3y
@Manz And I honestly am so glad that I never found anything bad or didn’t hurt anyone…ocd is nuts
- Date posted
- 3y
@Plaisie i have had that urge too. [trigger warning]. its terrifying. for me it has been further complicated by the fact that looking at anything that could be remotely wrong (even cartoon depictions of women in a deragatory way) i thought my physical anxiety was arousal. i actually discovered ocd because i was googling trying to see how i could be aroused by something that repulsed me and made me feel bad and didnt align with any of my values, or real life relationships and attractions, or any of the other things i was doing in my life. when i found out how anxiety can be mistaken for arousal (i thought i got aroused doing the drugs too) i somehow found my way to a moral scrupulosity ocd website and couldnt believe how much i related. i told my psychiatrist about ocd and she agreed. since then the urge hasnt been nearly as strong and i feel more confident because i know im not addicted, im not attracted to those things, and anxiety is not arousal. thats given me tremendous hope. ive been very suicidal in the past because id rather die than harm anyone. but i never could talk about it because i thought no one would help me. now im so hopeful. stay away from porn if you can, and let your doc help you see that the urges are not you and they will go away without you having to give them any attention. i have yet to see an erp doc, but have been able to implement some ideas already and resist drugs and porn. its helped in other less prominent obsessions, but everything in my life seems to have been shaped by ocd so its going to take time. im in perpetual doubt and fear about most things in all areas of my life. it sucks
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Recently ive had ocd thoughts that are really weird and make no sense (they sound like thoughts that someone would have if they were in physcosis eg. What if trump can communicate with you through your head) like what??? Sometimes it feels like i believe it??? Which stresses me out and im constantly worried that im going through physcosis since i sort of belive it? I know deep down its ridiculous but it almost feels like i believe it?? Im scared. Like sometimes im calm with the thought. Im like oh okay maybe. Then sometimes my brain tries to imagine him like talking to me through my head??? Am i going through physcosis.??
- Date posted
- 19w
i have been diagnosed with OCD & generalized anxiety disorder. for some reason, i’ve been very hyper aware of everything. like the way i talk, the way i see the world, how certain things sound/look/feel, and it’s very distressing. i feel like the hyper awareness makes me afraid of things? like for some reason, my mind attached to cartoons, and i was hyperfocusing on it, and got extremely scared, like scared of the cartoon for no reason? i’ve done this a lot, and i get scared i have psychosis or schizophrenia, or something that makes you afraid of things for no unknown reason. i feel so scared that this is my new normal…. im heartbroken. so many what if’s. did i just ruin my own life?? 💔
- Date posted
- 14w
I have been having these fears about developing schizophrenia, it reached a point where i am starting to almost hear things or the smallest sounds and my mind tells me you're schizophrenic, and i feel this weird sensations in my ear as if someone is whispering yet i can barely hear them, the thing is i am not diagnosed yet because i never work with an OCD therapist but i study psychology so i just used what i learnt to give a meaning to my suffering, many themes of this fear have been happening before and this schizophrenia fear is the last one. I want to know what advice you can give me or ways to make my brain calm down a little bit, i also don't have and can't afford a therapist that's why i am here in the first place I also want to know more informations or experiences with this theme if anyone habe experienced it and what helped you with it I remember feeling better for a while but than i collapsed back, but i am hoping to get better soon too or anytime in the future, I don't want reassurance so make sure you be as real as you can, and thanks 🙏🏻
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