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this is so relatable, i suffer with similar things. you’re not alone in your struggle!

But there is hope and it does get better you have to almost learn to play the game better than ocd, or at least that’s how I think about it.

Sometimes when i have bad OCD with some past events i try to think that every day that goes by moves me farther and farther away from that event (and when that event happened). The visual helps me let go of it a little bit. Hope that helps. I know it can be hard but remember no one is perfect or has a perfect past, including your boyfriend. It’s about who you are now that matters

I suffered the same exact thing for the first 2 years of our relationship, the best advice I found is devaluing the thought of the past action. Mine has evolved to basically needing to be extremely truthful regarding if I made it to class on time, if I saw someone that day and thought they were attractive, and I will need to confess this as they happen. I’ve worked really hard on staying away from doing compulsions which is confessions and rumination for me.I’m seeing progress by doing this, I haven’t had a therapist yet because I can’t afford it right now but I think doing self guided erp is helping. Also check out steven phillipson on the ocd stories podcast because he has some helpful tips that apply to this subtype