does anyone else struggle with worrying that they don’t have ocd bc that little voice in your head during compulsions has shut up? i realize i’m doing compulsions now with no little voice telling me what will go wrong, what might happen if i don’t do xyz, etc. and so now i’m worried i really don’t have ocd bc there’s not the thoughts telling me to do the compulsions i just do them now. and most of the time i’m not aware that i’m doing them and so whenever i do have that realization i get super freaked out and my anxiety rises bc i think that it’s not actually ocd and that i’m doing this to prove to myself that i do when i don’t?? but i KNOW i have severe ocd (self diagnosed) for example, today i opened the fridge at a grocery store and it took me 6 different tries to pick the “right” smart water. now 6 isn’t an ocd number for me but the feeling of something being just right is and so earlier when that happened i realized i didn’t have any thoughts beforehand telling me “if u don’t pick the right smart water xyz is true/will happen” << which that is a typical intrusive thought for me but when i had that realization i freaked out and my brain listed all of the intrusive thoughts i could pick from and put in place for that compulsion however i didn’t think of it beforehand and so i’m freaked out i don’t have ocd idk i’m so fucking tired of all this shit.

Oh really? I didn't even know that was a thing. I have been stressed about how sometimes I don't think I have that voice that says the intrusive thoughts.

@Mak46 I’m not at all saying that “just right” OCD for sure means you don’t have that little voice in your head. I just know that in my specific situation, that just so happens to be the case. I was so worried about meeting with a therapist bc I thought they would think I didn’t have OCD because I didn’t have those thoughts of “if I don’t do this, xyz will happen.” And honestly, I’m pretty sure my first two sessions was pretty much that.. however, my therapist was very open to learning and asking questions and she did not dismiss me just because of not having those thoughts. And we’ve definitely ended up making some progress even though it may be a bit more unconventional. But I definitely have that extremely strong feeling/urge without the thoughts behind it… and honestly I don’t know if that makes it easier or harder to control… I just know it’s hard to control either way. I do believe it’s possible even if I’m not fully there yet. If any of you guys ever want to just chat about your specific experiences, feel free to let me know (totally fine if not). I’d be happy to share my experience as well.

@Wambles13 Honestly talking about it would be great!

@Mak46 No problem! Feel free to shoot me an email (just so I don’t have to give out my number on here lol). My email is lindseywambles@yahoo.com. I’m not at all trying to be a therapist lol obviously I’m still in therapy myself. I just know it can be a relief knowing someone else is going through something similar.