Any tips for starting a relationship when you keep finding yourself picking apart every single thing about them? Every hobby, everything they've mentioned, their looks, their personality, everything?

This is what happened when I met my husband. After going through several bad relationships, I decided I was over the whole "dating" thing. Then I met this gentleman and could not figure out what it was that attracted me to him. He asked me out, and I said yes. Went out with him several times, but never by ourselves. We always had his friends and my friends with us. Like going to a movie, or going bowling, or miniature golfing ⛳ etc. But that didn't keep me from falling in love. I kept telling myself I wasn't falling in love. Then there was finally the chance we were going to have a real date. We were going to go to supper and then to a movie. During supper, the service sucked, so we had plenty of time to talk. Actually, he had plenty of time to "confess ". He told me all the bad things he had done in the past, like he was laying it all on the line to see if I still wanted to date him or not. All the time he was "confessing"I was trying to pick apart in my mind things about him that would make me no love him. Like stealing a crop dusting plane and wrecking it.(he didn't do this alone), he had two teeth missing on the upper left side of his mouth. He wasn't a cowboy (although he could ride a horse and help move cows), he helped my dad move cows. He wore polyester pants. There were other things, but they were all trivial. One time we went out after that(I still was trying to find things to make me not love him)he took me to a jewelry store. Now, I was panicking. He wanted to buy me a Black Hills Gold ring with a Garnet in it. I really wanted to say NO, but yes came out. My mother asked me if I was using him? That made me stop and really think about how I felt, how I really felt. I knew then that I loved him. Just in time too, because he asked me to marry him on our next date. On October 28th we will celebrate our 32nd wedding anniversary. We've been through a lot in that time. But God will see us through the obstacles we are facing right now. Depression, anxiety, OCD, and discomfort for my husband due to prostate cancer and the removal of the prostate. He is dealing with other side effects. Has had surgery on one testicle and the nerve going to it, and will have surgery on the other side on November 22nd or 23rd, not sure which one. So I have get better to be able to help him. Sorry for the long post. Just tried to answer question.

Yeah don’t start I’ve caught myself changing for them

I know, I know. TMI