Does anyone known what subtype this is and what I can do about it? So as a kid (Very young) ONCE I kissed a relative to practice kissing now OCD is calling me incest even though I had no sense of that at that age. But other than that, ocd is saying that any future relationship I get in, if me and the girl I would be dating kiss it would mean nothing because I did that. Its targeting the "first kiss thing" and so its saying since any future girl I date wont be my first kiss then it means nothing. I doesn't help that at a young age my mother used to kiss me goodnight (I believeaalot of peoples mother have) for some odd reason OCD is also attacking that.

Hello everyone I need some advice. I’ve struggled with what I think and hope is ocd for a long time. It started when I was 14 I had a concussion and my brain convinced myself for 9 months that I had this concussion. Then I had a gf at 15 before we were official I did a terrible thing im regretful of it for sure. I kissed another girl. I told my now ex girlfriend about it and I started to overthink the situation and think maybe I slept with the girl or maybe we did more than kiss. In reality we didn’t. when I turned 16 I started having thoughts of maybe I cheated on her with other girls at our school. It would be false memories of me sleeping or doing things with 4 or 5 other girls. That eventually went away as I would ask reassurance like a crazy person. Then one day what I believe was either Christmas time or new years around that time I had this thought “what if I SA’d my ex little sister?” This thought tormented me for so long I couldn’t believe it. As she was so young it would be impossible for me to do that without someone noticing plus that’s absolutely horrifying and disgusting and I’ve never ever ever ever been alone with her or desired to. Then what I knew would happen came along with me thinking I SA’d my little sister or my baby brother at the time. It was a horrible experience. Then it went to me thinking I was a pedo without the false memories. Then it went to my other siblings thinking I did something to them in their sleep, I did something to the pets, etc. As I got older I realized what ocd was and what I was going through and it eventually all went away. But as time goes on I’m now almost 24 I have spiraled back into thinking I SA my ex little sister. It’s crazy because I’ve never had that desire or anything at all it would absolutely break me if that was true. With something like this saying maybe not maybe it did is crazy because it’s a serious thing. I’m getting therapy on Monday and am just wanting my life back. I just recently got engaged to my beautiful fiancé and I want to be regular again. Anyone have any advice or even have gone through the same scenarios? It’s just so tough.

Ive dealt with pocd for a very long time now and it gets more real as time goes on. I was watching a movie and I’ve read the books so I knew there was a kiss scene coming up.The actors and their characters are children but I was basically looking forward to the scene. Then as they were kissing, it looked kind of weird and mechanical because again the actor was technically still a child. And I let myself indulge and enjoy it, of how someone young was doing something sexual and adult like. Idk I feel like a fuckikg creep but I don’t WANT this. There was nothing intrusive about this, it’s just something creepy that I’ve done. I keep ruminating about it but still. I don’t identify myself by this mistake but it still sucks. My mind then went to children that I know, one girl and one boy, and them separately doing sexual things for the first time and navigating that and it feels like I like it but I don’t. It’s not as real as the movie scene because the fact I enjoyed the scene WAS real but it’s still stressing me out.

Let me start by prefacing that I developed ocd as postpartum ocd after having my first child. I had harm and pocd. I had it on and off for years and then it just eventually went away completely for many years until recently after a stressful life event. Now that it’s back it again targets my children but now my grandchildren also. It’s been horrible and makes me pull away from them. Last night my 6 year old granddaughter threw up in the car when my daughter was about to take her home so my daughter brought her back in the house and asked me to clean her up while she cleaned her car. I had some anxiety about it because of my ocd but I couldn’t say no to helping so I opened the bathroom door and my granddaughter was standing in her underwear waiting for me to clean and dress her. Everything was fine and normal but then for some reason, I have no idea why, I looked down at her chest area. I immediately got so upset and didn’t know why I looked there and now my ocd is saying it’s because i’m a monster. I tried to tell myself it’s just normal human behavior when someone is standing there naked that you look where you shouldn’t simply because it’s just there in front of you but I feel horrible. I don’t feel any inappropriate way about her or any child but my ocd is saying it was inappropriate. Has anyone else been through this?