I’m not really sure how i feel. I thought i had pocd with groinal responses but I literally can’t get the arousal to go away at all. Like all day I’ve been hyper aware of how my groin feels. It’s also like during all thoughts and conversations. I know I’m worried I’m a monster and it’s making me sick but i also feel like the constant state of arousal is actually NOT POCD related but just. Something else. Can anyone else relate? It’s really hard to not focus on it.

Hey this is really normal! I don’t have POCD right now (but I did four years ago for a year and a half). I currently struggle with HOCD and the arousal happens for me sometimes or more like a feeling/sensation of attraction that goes through my body. Sometimes it’s just the thought of she’s attractive and sometimes it’s a feeling but regardless, I have experienced what you have described in both POCD and HOCD. Anxiety often shows itself as arousal. Also, remember that you can think a child is cute or adorable just like you can think someone of the same sex is beautiful or attractive without wanting to be in a sexual relationship with them. I have to remind myself of that all the time.

Thank you. I’ve just begun the journey which is why i think this is all so hard for me to understand. But you’re right, i hate how i feel, I’m not excited by this feeling, it makes me want to vomit. Which i need to calm down because i understand the intense fear isn’t making it better, but i need to remind myself it’s not a good feeling and that’s a positive thing, it means I’m not a monster. Thank you for sharing your story with me, it makes me feel less alone.

Yeah of course! And also don’t forget that ocd can also make you wonder if you might like the thoughts and feelings. Sometimes it can be very convincing in that regard. That’s also completely normal for ocd if that happens to you. It has happened to me! It’s called the doubting disease for a reason. Hang in there!

Thank you. The thing is i don’t even think kids are cute lol. The problem has become i see a child and think to myself “oh my god am i pedophile?” For no reason. But after i had that intrusive thought a few times, i feel a sensation in my pants.... but now it feels literally constant. I’m not thinking of children, but i am thinking of how awful i feel if it were true.... so i do this it’s my ANXIETY making me feel the arousal and not like any actual person or child.... it’s just really strange and I’m not sure how to get over it... i think the feeling in my pants is making me feel worse than ever now. How did you ignore it?

Yes it’s the anxiety. And honestly, I still struggle not to ignore it for the HOCD. But what I did with POCD, and what I try to do with HOCD is let the thought or feeling pass through me and try not to ruminate over it so much. But also I know that none of this brings me joy. I never wanted to be a pedophile and I don’t want to be homosexual. I have nothing against people who are homosexual, but my dream has always been to have a husband. Do I think women are structurally beautiful? Of course. I also think sunsets are beautiful. It means nothing. So I try to not overthink these intrusive feelings or thoughts. I know how hard it is. It’s the worst thing ever. I hate it more than anything. But we are all on this journey together!

I found the groinal response took longer to go away than the obsessions