- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I wish I could go back and change things 💔
- Date posted
- 3y
It feels horrible, I don’t know why I ever thought or liked this stuff, I like to think I’ve matured a lot since then, but I really don’t feel like I have, I want to believe people can change, but it feels impossible
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCDHaver Is it related to po**? I’m struggling too with things in the past. Like what if I came across the wrong thing like people related on po** sites and I feel terrible like what if?
- Date posted
- 3y
@Just Breathe ❤️ It is, but also just really gross things I’ve done. I’ve confessed the worse to others, but I’m terrified of myself, I just really want to live the rest of my life out alone
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCDHaver I understand. I’m terrified too probably for different reasons but you are definitely not alone
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCDHaver I just wish someone could help me but sometimes my posts get ignored and then I feel so along and in the dark it makes me feel worse
- Date posted
- 3y
@Just Breathe ❤️ I’ve seen, I try to respond to as many as possible, I just like to remember how hard it is for me to do things, and I imagine we all feel that way, so responding to others might drain a lot of people on here
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCDHaver I understand
- Date posted
- 3y
@Just Breathe ❤️ It’s okay, we’re all in a lot of pain, I HIGHLY doubt that whatever you’ve done is as bad as mine, I hope you can find peace someday!
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCDHaver You too!
- Date posted
- 3y
I understand those feelings so much. I fear I acted on mine but I can't tell if I ever did..one thing I did act on and regret a lot. I absolutely hate who I was,, I even did these things last year whuch scares me so much. I do belive you've changed, you show so much hatred to what you've done. My themes are really taboo so I always fear others thinking I'm weird or my past..if you ever need anybody to talk to Im here! And I'll look out for you on this app! :)
- Date posted
- 3y
*which
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so much, it is really hard. And my thoughts and real events are also really taboo, I like to think this is a place free of judgment, I hope we get through this!
- Date posted
- 3y
I struggle with this too. But understand that we all make mistakes. Sometimes its the things you were exposed to that twist your mind into thinking of things you would never do. Cut off from your life the things that influenced you to do those things, if you havent already, and carry on. There are days where it will be hard to forgive yourself. When you dwell on your past, but look at the change you are making now and be proud of how much you’ve grown. If you fall again, get up. Keep going.
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you, this actually really helps. I’ve cut out a lot of things and people that have influenced me like that. Looking back, a lot of people around normalized things that shouldn’t be. I’m happy I know better now, I just wish to be better and to possibly help others if and when I can. It just really hurts knowing I’ve done the things I’ve done
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCDHaver Exactly. And I’ve sure you’ve heard this one before “you acted on the limited knowledge you had then.” And its true. Or sometimes you just knew it was bad but never really sat down and thought how bad it was. Understand that you are looking at the past with a new and fresh understanding. You won’t ever erase the past, no matter how much you cry about it, but you can change your whole life and mindset now. Do one thing everyday to help someone. It could be the smallest thing. It might not help you get over the guilt/ocd you feel, but youll know that atleast you did one good thing for someone or something. Believe me there were be super bad days when all you think about is the bad/real event stuff. But keep going. Hopefully the other people on thread can read this and bring some help.
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCDHaver *there will be super bad days
- Date posted
- 3y
@walkingtacostand You’re spot on on the “knew it was bad but didn’t know just how bad it was”. I lacked a lot of self awareness for a lot of years, but I’m just glad I learned and stopped. Thank you for the advice, I’ll try to help others in whatever way I can, thank you!
- Date posted
- 3y
Same, I’m in bed awake over it right now, my core fear is that the gross things I’ve done mean something about me today. I get confused as to why I even did it but I also get scared that I’d do it again. It makes me sick, especially when I get images and thoughts of me doing it.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
I have made multiple mistakes in my past that lead me to believe im a bad person. thinking about them often sends me into a panic attack. i cant help but feel i need to be punished. i hate this feeling, what should i do?
- Date posted
- 25w
When i was between the ages of 11-18 i was a very mentally ill and hyper sexual kid. I did a lot pf sexting, sent nudes, and even one video of me doing inappropriate things that haunt me to this day. I have changed a lot since then and realized that this was all jn relation to (TW!!) sexual abuse i experienced as a child/teen. I still feel horrible for the things that I have done and think about this daily. I beat myself up because I know it was wrong of me to act that way growing up. Im afraid that someone will find these texts/pictures/videos one day and it will lead to my complete humiliation. I want to throw up at the thought of people i know and love seeing me act that. Its not who I am or who I ever was. I regret that part of my life so deeply it hurts.
- Date posted
- 18w
Everyday I wake up, all my mind makes me think of is the stuff I’ve done in the past, like all day I’m in a constant cycle of judging who I used to be and it hurts so so much. I wish I never thought to do those things, I wish I had been more mature than how I was before, it’s really lowering my self worth and I don’t think I’ve ever felt this miserable before, like last summer was the worst because I was dealing with this shit, I about almost ended my life over it, and I thought it would get better, which it did, but it didn’t last but for a while. As soon as it became 2025 I was going through it again, having constant cycles of “I’m a good person” to “I’m the worst person imaginable” and I’m so sick of it because I just want to feel like the good person l like to imagine myself to be, but I can’t because of shit I did in the past that I obsess over. I’ve cried and screamed so much over it and it seems like it will never leave me.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond