Look I probably haven’t got ocd I suffer from sexuality ocd but I have a lot of arousal to what I fear which is being gay I feel arousal whenever I see a man now

Can sexual orientation ocd make you act on your fears and make you have same sex experiences ever and then after the experience realize that’s not what you are or want?

I feel so ridiculous saying this. Has anyone struggled with looking down a people’s private areas since having ocd. I hate it, but feel I have to look or find myself just looking. I feel so guilty after and especially when it’s a women I kinda shudder after like why did I just do that. Ugh I hate this. I never used to have this issue but now I’m focusing on it my anxiety is going crazy with it . If people have experienced, how did you get over this??? My sexual orientation is thriving off this . I hate it

I’ve completely lost myself. I can’t focus on my studies, I can’t go to the gym. Dang it I can’t even be around my male friends normally anymore. I got no idea why or how this happened but the only thing I know for sure is that I never questioned my sexuality neither doubted it. I never cared in general. I just liked girls. I keep testing and keep testing and keep testing my arousal but no matter how many times I see but I don’t feel the same way for guys that I do with girls my mind will always try to make me believe that I am gay. It’s like it’s forcing me into an identity I never asked for. But at the end of the day like my psychologist told me. Sexuality doesn’t change. So since I never felt anything for guys in my life it’s ocd. I’ve been up and down for 5 months now and while the last week I was feeling way better. Monday now and I’m back to zero. I just want to go back when everything was normal. I can’t keep living with this.