- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Just right is a specific theme but reassurance seeking is a compulsion. There’s relationship ocd (rocd) which is another theme and it can be any type of relationship. In short, anything can be an obsession… Very common to have more than one obsession and they can change like for years I could have harm ocd as my main obsession and down the road it could be contamination ocd. I’m sorry about your struggle. Be strong and educate yourself. We, as a fellow ocd sufferer, can do a lot of damage if we’re not managing ocd well.
- Date posted
- 3y
To answer your final question, is she in ERP therapy? It’s hard but not impossible and she has to want treatment bc some of our compulsions are mental, internal and undetected by our friends and family. And some external compulsions can be subtle too… so the sufferer has to be the one monitoring for improvement
- Date posted
- 3y
Hi! I struggle with ROCD, and when I was your daughter’s age (and up until … well recently!), I did the same thing she does. I felt like that one friend was the person who would fix everything - be my best friend, my supporter, my world and any questions I had (all the reassurance seeking, all the secrets I wanted to share, all the thoughts I had) would be answered by them. It’s like a way-too-excited puppy when they see their owner. From my experience, I think it’s important to have someone you trust tell you if something is starting to get too much or a little weird. When I was 13, I had one best friend I would get SUPER jealous of her when she hung out with other friends and would monopolize her time when we hung out with groups. I would hug her, sit on her lap, hang out with her always, talk about her a ton… we did everything together! My mom (we are close, I trust her a lot) pointed out it was a lot, and probably not fair to her or me. It was calm, it was in a kind way, just expressing her concern. I think it would be a good idea to point it out depending on your relationship with your D, but find the right moment or situation. Use facts and not feelings. Maybe tell her not to put all her eggs in one basket, it’s important to have healthy space in relationships too. I agree that she has to want to fix the problem herself, and ERP would really help. From experience, I turned out okay without OCD therapy and struggled similarly; I have a lot of friends, several boyfriends, have healthy relationships with the people in my life, and am successful in my own life. I just started OCD therapy a month ago (I’m 24) and it has been really helpful but I think the path here wasn’t unmanagable with ROCD as a teen, although it was hard. I’m so sorry your D is struggling and you are too. She will be okay!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 16w
I’ve posted this under a comment before, but if anyone has the time to read it and maybe share their experience or tips with me, I would really appreciate it. This is just kind of the reason why Idk if I only have OCD or if I should get checked for BPD aswell as emotional dependency is (as far as I know) not a common symptom of OCD and neither are excessive changes in emotions/moods. I think the worst part my situation is that one of my biggest and most damaging if not destructive obsessions I developed earlier this year was this constant fear that my friend would lie to me about meeting up with a boy she liked (we are both girls and queer, she didn’t know that about me until recently, but I’ve known that she is and we both sort of crushed on each other). Not just lie, but do it behind my back, keep it a secret, and then maybe even end our friendship without saying anything. And the thing is... that basically happened. Two weeks ago she started acting strange one day out of nowhere, and then I found out (through another friend) that he was coming over to her place. We had already talked about this before, I had cried in front of her and confessed how much it hurt me. I know doing that probably wasn’t the healthiest thing, but my emotions completely overwhelmed me in that moment. And even though nothing physical happened between them, it still felt like a betrayal. I’m not saying it was cheating, obviously not, we’re not in a relationship and it is unfair of me to try and tell her who or not to date, but it still hurts. Especially as weeks ago, we already had a detailed conversation about this. She told me she didn’t actually like him that much, and that if they were going to meet again, she’d be honest with me about it. But instead of being honest that day, she said nothing. Worse, she suddenly stopped talking to me, which made me think I had done something wrong so I completely lost my mind. She knows I’m emotionally dependent on her to some extent, so when she goes cold or distant, I spiral. And that day, I saw them talking and going quiet as I walked by, and then she literally turned to walk into a different direction. I don’t know why but it just crushed me. I thought she was mad at me, and I just felt like I was being shut out and lied to. And as I’ve mentioned, later that day, after eight hours of crying, another friend told me what really happened. She even drove me to her place so we could talk. We did talk, but since then, we haven’t had any contact. And it’s driving me absolutely insane. She told me it would be “people-pleasing” if she didn’t try to date him. And I know she’s kind of right, but she still lied to me. She didn’t care if that meant that she would throw away our friendship, or at least she treated it like it was worth less than a potential (!) relationship with a guy who, as far as I know, didn’t even respond when she told him she had feelings for him. It’s honestly devastating. I feel betrayed, discarded, and totally lost and I know I can’t even logically be mad at her as the reason she didn’t tell me is obvious and as a good friend I should just be happy for her, but my emotional side is so much stronger than my logic.
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- Date posted
- 9w
My little sister is 13 we’ve taken her to a child psychologist and she was diagnosed with OCD and social anxiety and I believe germaphobia. The psychologist said that he can’t properly diagnose her with autism until her anxiety symptoms are treated. But I am very positive that she is also autistic as I am autistic and know the symptoms vary well. She was given a medication at a low dose, I don’t remember what kind, she had been taking it even tho she did not want to for a couple of months. It seemed to be helping her anxiety immensely but I believe she is scared of how the medication changes how she feels and she doesn’t like the taste. So they switched medications and that one was even worse because the taste was too strong she didn’t even try it for more than a day so there’s no way of knowing if that one was better for her or not. These are both liquid medications btw we used juice for her to drink it. Since then she hasn’t taken any medication and she has said that she doesn’t want to. We can’t force her to take the medication as that would obviously be counter productive. But since then her ocd and germaphobia have gotten progressively worse. On top of not wanting medication she doesn’t like the idea of using any coping skills like deep breaths or breathing exercises to calm down and doesn’t like the idea when I talk about ERP or therapy or any kind of treatment that could help. It seems all the ideas either make her uncomfortable or scare her. I fear somewhat that my own ocd compulsions have made her think that this is normal and doesn’t need treatment and I don’t know what to do to help understand that treatment and change isn’t scary. I also fear that I’m not approaching this right and my mom doesn’t understand ocd like I do so I feel like it falls on me to help her through this and help my mom understand what we need to do to help her. I’m sorry this is so long. thank you for reading this. She’s really struggling and it’s affecting my own mental health too and I don’t know what to do. If anyone has any tips or advice please that’s all I’m asking for.
- Date posted
- 6w
So I recently met this girl and honestly she is amazing. She’s beautiful and her personality is perfect. She lives only 15 min away from me and I feel blessed to have a chance to get to know her, we both feel the same. But here comes OCD to ruin it. My OCD has latched onto a friend of mine. He’s a pretty close friend and we talk often. He’s never really one to let out a laugh so I always like to hear him laugh and just be able to have a good time. Partially it’s because I just don’t want to think I’m annoying and unfunny, I’m pretty self concious about myself. OCD is turning this into some sort of scary what if I like him question. I don’t have romantic feelings for my friend and I don’t actually want to be with a man. I am a straight male and getting to know this girl has been a blessing. OCD makes me feel in denial and as if I’m lying to myself. I hate this. It feels awful, when I haven’t felt this way about a girl in a long time
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