Hi! I'm new to this app. But really hoping I can find community. I've been struggling for a while with OCD and it kinda went dormant for a bit (I primarily have relationship OCD and have been single for a while). Then, as I'm weeks away from a vacation I've really been looking forward to, POOF here comes the OCD boss. (I use "boss" as a specific analogy here. Think like... video game boss. The big scary guy standing between you and the next chapter in the game.) Instead of latching onto my relationships, it has latched onto the trip itself. Im putting the work in. And really "leaning in" to the ERP. I've even had several breakthroughs on my own!!! But man does this guy know how to put up a fight. Im now 16 days away from this trip and trying to really push. But of course another boss (menstrual cycle) has decided to join in the little party here. Here's to still fighting!! One boss fight at a time.
"Pure" OCD - Community
1. I’m having feelings as I think about girls 2. I get intrusive thoughts of being homosexual or bisexual in denial 3. The feelings are still there so it’s making it feel real 4. I look up reassuring images of girls and I see triggering images 5. The images cause me less anxiety so now I get intrusive thoughts of being aroused by these triggering images 6. Feelings are still there so it makes it feel real
My HOCD thoughts are now telling me that I’m sad of being straight when being straight is all I want in my life. The reason why I was sad was because I don’t think any girl would ever be attracted to me for me. 😞😞😞 it’s making me feel like I’ve accepted the intrusive thoughts when being with a girl is all I want 😭😭😭 my HOCD makes it feel real… 😞😞😞
1. I’m able to hear songs in my head. So if a song is stuck in my head I hear the original singers voice and it just plays In my head. 2. My internal monologue can mimic voices if I start to get nervous. It feels like an intrusive thought but also feels like I’m in control. Sometimes my mind starts to play tricks on me and I hear a “voice” but it feels like it only comes up after I start thinking about this theme. This is all internal no external voices. Essentially, it feels like inner voice or internal monologue has vivid expression. Is this normal?
can I ask for anyone with experience. I have pure ocd and harm ocd. I’m considering going on medication because it’s getting pretty bad. I’m scared to go on the medication because there are so many side effects and other issues. I heard it can make you gain tons of weight and can make you worse. Anyone have any insight
Feel like Im more conscious of the world and myself after ocd, it feels like for me before ocd I never questioned anything, sexuality, gender being at the core of it, like my opinions and identity was shaped by culture and other people and i didnt have my own identity, even my attraction to women. Like i never cared or bothered to understand things before or that I was not a normal human before ocd but now Im "normal" and realizing that im not who I projected/percieved myself as. I believe it is true to some degree but I dont know if thats ocd talking or if it actually is true, makes it impossible in my head to figure out what is real and not. Im a billingual so theres 2 langauges playing inside which makes it so much more confusing, its a hot mess in my head feel like Im starting life all over again. Im afraid this will drive me to insanity. Sorry, i know its incoherent, its just really difficult to put into words.
Does anyone else worry endlessly whether they are having the right emotional reaction to things? Like for as long as I can remember whenever I saw something sad on the tv or someone told me something bad that happened to them I’ve always worried that I am not distressed or worried enough. This is to the point where I will go back and manufacture the emotional response I wanted to have but then feel bad that I don’t seem to feel that naturally. Yesterday, my friend told me something really upsetting and since then I’ve been feeling extremely overwhelmed. I worry that I am being selfish because I want this feeling to go away and yet I feel like this would be ignoring my friends pain and so force myself to sit in it for long periods of time. This then makes me worry that I will be too overwhelmed to help her and feel guilty that I am not strong enough. Then I worry that I am not even feeling worried enough and should be feeling worse…. and then the cycle continues. I think I have had symptoms relating to moral scrupulously before and was wondering if this has anything to do with it? If so, does anyone have any advice for how to deal with it?
I swear this community of people knows pain and struggle like no other. I’m there with you. I has been a really horrible time for me and I know a lot of you are in the same boat. So this is me saying to all of you to just keep going. Take care of yourself however you can. Things will get better.
i am constantly counting and clenching my jaw/hand twitches, every single second of the day. My head tells me if I don’t count things in a specific way, something bad will happen (partner will cheat, someone will die) I know it isn’t true but I can’t stop feeding into it. I feel so incredibly alone.
does anyone else mentally review the past to see if they’re obsession felt true at any other point? it feels like it kind of did for me (i don’t know if the memories are real though), so i’m struggling now more than i ever have with an obsession because it feels more legitimate this time. any advice?
Has anyone had this happen? I can literally be fantasizing about a girl my age, and my brain will be like YOU WANT A CHID TO POP UP IN THIS FANTASY RIGHT? FRESH DELIVERY OF MENTAL TORTURE. It's so hard to apply ERP tactics for because just letting it be there quite literally makes me sick to my stomach and make me feel like I want to dig my eyes out with a spoon haha. Idk how to cope with moments like that. It's scary.
I don't understand people's actions, I don't understand why they feel another way, think another way, act another way, they joke weird way. Am I became a different person or my reactions and feelings became like that because of my constant anxiety? I'm like not a person I was in September. I don't like jokes I used to like even couple months ago, I don't like other people's behavior anymore. I think OCD influenced me and helped me prioritize. It's not bad but Im afraid that I'll lose all of my friends because they will hate me. Now I have so much stress and sometimes I lose control and talk louder that I should talk, maybe my intonation is not good too. I always apologize for that.
Hi. Recently I’ve been feeling like I’m not myself, and everything just feels very strange. It’s hard to explain but it feels like I don’t feel anything but emptiness. Is this symptoms of depersonalization or derealization? Anyone who have experienced the same ? :(
I feel so alone right now in this feeling. And it also feels so real. I’m like terrified of being delusional but also then ask myself…am I already there? I’m scared I’ll lose control and hurt myself, end up in the mental institution or my boyfriend. I’m even scared to look at my boyfriend because I’m like “what if I think he’s going to hurt me”. Even debated calling a psychiatrist to make sure all I have is OCD. I know that wouldn’t actually be helpful. Anyone else experience something like this? Any tips?
OCD has created a lot of horrific imagery in my mind as you would expect and since then my anxiety has died down especially in the last week. However, I feel like because I've had images like severe harming or killing someone, stuff that's still really bad but slightly less bad like pedophilia doesn't really seem bad to me. It's scary because I certainly don't want to do anything like that to anyone
Im trying to ignore it, im trying to just let it pass, im trying to accept uncertainty but its not working. It helped a little and i was ok for a few days but now my ocd is right back to where it was and now its maybe worse. Idk if i can do this anymore man. These thoughts are too horrific and despicable and i just want them out of my head but i just dont know how.
Im horrified because my Intrusive thoughts are starting/trying to make me feel like i secretly want these things to happen. I know you shouldn’t do this but everytime i try to say i dont want this now i get this guilt or bad feeling in my system like i actually do. I Also sometimes get that same feeling whenever i hear about someone doing bad things like this on the news like I did it too or i want to do it. These unwanted feelings and urges are starting to scare me more and more to death and idk what to do. Its really making me feel like i shouldn’t be here smh
I’ve been doing pretty well managing my OCD with exposures as I see them and medication. But lately my OCD has gotten harder to control due to my moms cancer and how I’m afraid of her dying and also afraid of cancer in general and getting cancer (or convincing myself that I may already have cancer.) Anyone had this theme before and if anything what did you do to help? Thanks ❤️
Does anyone else get triggered a lot when they read articles about "loosing feelings" or simply "falling out of love"? Because most I've read talk about how it was just a gut feeling that they weren't in love with their partner anymore and that they needed to leave them and that it's better that way. Personally I don't really see any problems in my relationship and would consider it very healthy, but I can't shake off the feeling that "what if I have the same gut feeling"? Or what if I don't even have ocd? I hope this makes sense to anyone... I'm just very confused, because I really want my relationship to work out but I feel like I'm making myself crazy
I spend each and every day replaying past mistakes in my head from childhood to 20 years old. Sometimes I wonder why it took me so long to grow up. It never leaves my mind and I’m constantly confessing all my mistakes to anyone who will listen.
Hi Community. So, I have self-diagnosed OCD. I've struggled with vicious intrusive thoughts since I was a teenager (now 30) I discovered what intrusive thoughts and OCD is only a couple years ago now. I have POCD / False Memory OCD / intrusive thoughts of sexual nature involving family and children. As well as violent intrusive thoughts of things like cannibalism etc. There was a point in my life I felt like a monster, not knowing why I thought these things or couldn't know for certain that I haven't done certain things was eating me alive. After I read a book on intrusive thoughts, I became overwhelmingly relieved to know that the certain mental images I have arent an actual indicator of who I am or what I desire to do. Which has led me to feeling so much better on a day to day basis. However, I still struggle with the anxieties and subtle doubts when ocd/intrusive thoughts pop up. I am wondering if therapy is something I should dive into. I have no therapy experience whatsoever, and am scared of sharing some of the most sickening images and thoughts I have in my head. I am honest to my partner about all my ocd stuff and she is very supportive, and overall I am now able to let most thoughts slide. But when I am put into certain situations like being around children or family, I still have anxiety. Do you think therapy will help me? Can I be confident I wont be condemned and sent to jail for the things I have thought / think about from time to time? Thank you!
Does anyone get numb from the OCD thoughts? Like they still appear and stuff but you just dont get as scared anymore? But at the same time it’s scary cuz like why am i not getting scared over harming someone? I know i don’t want too but at the same time me not having much of that anxiety feeling when they pop up makes me feel like i do. Ugh. It’s like it has me convinced i want too. This is exhausting
My OCD has now completely overtaken my life. I can have good days when I think I'm making progress, get ruined by intrusive thoughts at any point, most of which don't make any sense. It makes me feel like I'm failing at life right now. People around me don't seem to get just how difficult it is
Im trying to ignore it, im trying to just let it pass, im trying to accept uncertainty but its not working. It helped a little and i was ok for a few days but now my ocd is right back to where it was and now its maybe worse. Idk if i can do this anymore man. These thoughts are too horrific and despicable and i just want them out of my head but i just dont know how.
i’ve been home bound since I was 18, since about just before the pandemic begun. i’ve taken the last two years to really learn about myself, my body, my conditions and research and practice mindfulness. all this in attempt to get a grasp on life so to ensure that i don’t continue struggling so severely with my mental health well into adulthood. I turned 20 this January and just had a kind of epiphany that I was “ready” to be happy, to start living, and to apply all this knowledge i’ve learned during this (surprisingly enlightening) transitional period. As if I had all the pieces to make the puzzle come together. Since then, I’ve been taking bolder strides in my social and creative ventures ( areas of my life where OCD has wreaked havoc most) and making solid attempts to practice mindfulness and coping strats daily. Which at first, was so rewarding and fulfilling because I was using the concepts and strategies I’ve been expanding on and practicing to overcome *such* a great deal of anxiety that had been plaguing my life. I was getting tasks done and seeing tangible growth, it felt like I was going through a metamorphosis. but omg metamorphosis is so uncomfortable and scary??? the more i progress the worse my OCD is getting??? The strategies and coping mechanisms feel like they are becoming compulsions. meditating has become a compulsion ‼️ self-care has become a compulsion :((( which is so upsetting and deeply distressing. because it feels like there’s nothing that will make it better and the things that are intended to make it better are starting to feel exactly like what i’m trying to get better at, if that makes any sense.
Can your intrusive thoughts turn into dreams?? Ive been struggling with harm OCD bad this last week for my first time and had multiple dreams last night of harm and it makes me so uneasy. Makes me doubt myself and think i would do it especially if im even dreaming about it and thats my biggest fear
Does anyone else feel like not confessing is immoral? The thing is, the events I recalled could have been remembered wrong in a state of extreme panic and I decided to stop questioning whether it happened because it doesn’t really serve me / reflect me / my values. I’m taking the first step towards healing :) But occasionally I fear that just moving on with my life is not a moral thing to do.
for anyone else are you scared you did your false memory and just say your not sure it happened so you feel better about yourself? i know it doesn’t make sense cus i still feel so guilty so obviously i don’t feel good about myself. but i also feel like i’m just not taking responsibility another question does anyone feel like they can’t focus enough to ruminate? i don’t know if i’m saying it good but like i’m not trying to remember if i did it i just feel guilty at the possibility i did, or the fact that i could’ve. i don’t even know i just feel so guilty. im not even scared i just feel sad and it’s so annoying cus i know i didn’t do it but i gee like because i feel guilty that means i did
In a state of panic and fear that you did something wrong, is it possible that you recalled a memory incorrectly? I keep getting so scared because I have a faint memory of doing something but all the specifics are not there. And I was in such a state of panic and anxiety that I wonder if it’s possible I recalled a memory incorrectly even though it feels so familiar ? I’m trying to be patient with myself even though I fear I did something terrible but I feel like if I did, I would’ve remembered it or there would’ve been more emotions tied to it? Is it possible that my memory is skewed or the recall is impacted by my anxiety ?
Im falling apart, it feels like the shell is breaking down and my real self is coming out. I feel like im having cognitive dissonance, believing Im a straight man my whole life and now realizing im neither and complete opposite of who I thought I was and projected myself as, cognitive dissonance causes stress I know that much but the depression is so amplified these days, i cant cope. It feels like I already know these things to be true deep down and just unable to comprehend that it is happening. Im suffocating so much.
Hi i have been struggling with the theme of psychosis or schizo for quite a few months now, and im really struggling. My mind relates everything to me going crazy. Like likterally anything and i am so tired. Does anyone have any advice, or have struggled with this theme before? Thank u
I have chosen to simply stop worrying , stressing , analyzing and preparing myself for my downfall. I know I am straight I don’t go to prove anything to myself or anyone else. I’m calling this the end of the journey cause I’m too tired of wracking my brain and creating false scenarios.
I will never meet anyone on here or anything, but I still wanted to say this. I had no idea that a community like this existed. I knew I wasn’t the only one, because obviously someone has felt the way I felt before, but seeing other people post about their concerns— in ways that reflect my own— sort of felt freeing. I’m glad and a little bit grateful to know that someone else feels similarly to me. It doesn’t make my OCD any less shitty, but I’m still glad that I’m not alone on earth feeling this way I guess.
Does anyone feel like they are pressured to do intentional ERP, even though they’ve learned many tools to progress? I feel like there’s this pressure layer on heavy that we can’t fully get better without intentional ERP. I don’t think that’s fair.
I'm seriously struggling with false memory OCD. They have completely overtaken my brain and made me think I am an awful person. It seems as soon as an interaction ends or I walk away false memories start to get implanted inside my head, and they start to override everything inside my head. It's actually awful and I feel totally paralyzed by them. I don't know what to do anymore as I can hardly live my life in peace anymore due to my ocd.
what do i do with false memories? i know that it is a false memory because it’s over a real event that i used to ruminated a lot over and i never had this memory until today. I know it’s a false memory but it still scares me so much. i know not to do compulsions but i don’t know what else to do
I feel sick all the time. I just get so uncomfortable and embarrassed that it makes me feel sick to my stomach. It’s the hardest part of ERP for me because I feel like if I don’t do my compulsions, I might throw up, or I might get sick, or someone might touch me, what should I do when I feel sick like this?
Everyday i wake up, gay feels more natural, instead of having clarity Im straight like normal hocd sufferers, i have moments during the day where its clear to me that I am really gay. Not even questioning just feel like I cant accept it to be true. But I still experience high anxiety daily, my heart beats so fast bc of it it feels like it will jump out of my chest. This anxiety feels different than when ocd first started, Idk, i think Im just having anxiety bc im gay now or ive realized Im gay but my brains broken due to ocd and cant turn off the anxiety switch.
So I’ve been struggling with the fear of losing my mind lately. My brain has been trying to convince me that I’m gonna lose it at any second. I was having some pretty bizarre intrusive thoughts recently and I started to question if I was becoming delusional or not. When I would get the intrusive thought I would panic, thinking I was really losing touch with reality. Now my Brain is checking to see if I’m hearing voices, so I will picture a weird sound in my head and then freak out thinking I’m hearing something. It kept happening over and over until it was all I was thinking about and the I ended up having a panic attack thinking I was going crazy. Has this happened to anyone else? I really need advice. Thank you in advance!
Ok so I suffer from intrusive thoughts around my husband. I know that ruminating is bad and that I need to learn to sit with the thoughts and feelings. It’s hard but I’m managing a little more each day but I have a constant feeling of being in denial, burying my head like I really should be reacting, checking, figuring it out. Is this normal when doing the work? Does it get better eventually and how long does it take?
So confused.. some days I’m so uncertain and somedays I’m fine but end up realizing that I’m Not worrying and end up worrying and lose the day to worry and doubt. Trying very hard to not reassurance myself mentally, no compulsions. The thoughts and feelings seem to be harder when your trying to stop reassurance seeking
my bf suffers from intrusive thoughts just like me. but i think we are accidentally fuelling eachothers intrusive thoughts. we are both terrified of being in a toxic relationship, or using eachother. and deep down i know we arent, but we both get so scared and it feels so real. im terrified im using him, or manipulating him, and hes scared of the exact same. the song using you by mars argo triggered me really bad, to the point i had that horrible anxious feeling for almost 20 minutes. we are both in horrible situations rn, and we are both trying to get back into therapy. how can i help both of us calm down? i know its just our intrusive thoughts but they feel so real :[ i just want us to be happy, i love him so much
A VERY exhausting day at work almost ruined by OCD. I had intrusive thoughts of me snapping. Losing control. I went about my day anyway. Yes - the anxiety sucked. Yes - I wanted to go home and hide. Yes - I hated every moment. However I decided - this is what OCD wants, not what I want - my thoughts aren’t real and are automatic - there’s no reason why I have the thoughts that I have - I have OCD
tw racism ocd help help help i'm so scared. i've had this memory from when i was suffering from strong racism OCD i went in old servers on discord and looked up the n word to see if i had everr said it.. i don't know if it's a false memory but i'm genuinely so scared because if i wrote it that means i'm racist even if i was just looking for traces of me saying it.. help i'm so scared i don't know what to do...
Do you ever feel like if you have no more rocd, it was just the fact that under all you know you stopped to like them? We broke up past month (his problems, not because my rocd), and I was so overwhelmed that it was a relief. Really; we broke up two times, the first when I was full with ocd, and It was super painful, I cried a lot and I missed him. But this time... zero! I can't miss him, I can't feel sad! I was so mad with him for everything that he did that I hate to admit it, but it was the best solution. For me too. Probably, it was what I wanted for a while, but I couldn't do anything or admit it to myself. Plus, I started to find him like if I don't know him anymore, I would love to still have feelings for him; but I don't. I think that my rocd was telling me that. That we have no future. Or I don't have hope with him. Actually, now I find him pretty annoying sometimes, I look at him in a different way; and it is sad because now he is trying to solve his problems. I waited 5 months for this. I lost all my feelings in thoose 5 months because he never puts effort. And NOW he is trying to solve. That really make me super angry. Plus today he sent me a video; and I didn't found him attractive at all! So i don't know If I got rocd because I already don't love him or if I just don't know how you should love someone in an healthy way. Anyway, he is putting effort to solve things. But how can I open my hear again to someone that already broke it twice? I already know how things will be.... plus now, I'm the one with no feelings, that hate a lot of things he did and do
I have this thing that when the night comes this sensations appear and it keeps telling me that something bad is about to happan or that i'm going to do something bad and it makes me feel stuck beacuse it keeps repeating and my poor brain doesn't know any different than to respond and worries me
It’s hard for me to say it to people, but I think if I want to get better I should. I’m gonna start listening to my recording. I realized that while I was doing a good job of mindfulness and breaking out of the cycle. I need to face the “fears”. So here goes… I have intrusive thoughts about my mother. Truthfully, these are all from when I was a lot younger. However, the thought popping back up was me remembering it from 13 years ago. Ever since this feeling of blah and and anxiety has been through me for months. I also have ROCD. Really tough breakup with a lot of issues, and the questioning of everything in a relationship. Especially, do I find the person attractive every day. Or if I notice any “flaws”. All of this to me makes me sound like this “Toxic Masculinity Guy.” And I’m not like that. It also stems from wanting to love and romance like they have in movies and having to finally realize that love is not like the movies. I want them to stop, and I get moving past. But I got to figure this out, so I can move past.
Just a reminder shifting focus off of content of my fear by realizing the shapeshifter nature of ocd helps! Like if I wasn’t obsessing about this theme I’d obsess about another …. So maybe the content of my fear isn’t the problem rather the structure of the fear itself. Ready to seek out and accept my anxiety insteAd of avoid it and try to solve it 🥰
This identity crisis or whatever it is is killing me. Im scared and dissociated, it feels like im constantly on a weed high feeling. I feel like a woman inside, or percieving men from a womans eye. Im worried that even this trans thing is true and soon it will turn into gender dysphoria. What the hell am i going to do?
Im worried I dont love my boyfriend... Sometimes I just want to be by myself for a few days to just relax and be by myself and I feel like i should be wanting to see him everyday. Sometimes I get a bit annoyed at him too and I don't know why. I keep overthinking if he's the one for me or if we should break up. I keep thinking of what if I want someone more like this or like that. What if he doesnt give me enough affection etc. The thoughts have been bad lately and I dont even know what's real or not. I'm just really upset and worried. I suffer from ocd but I'm worried its not even ocd and that we're not compatible
I started this app today and well.. I need help. I get very stressed out when I'm feeling out of control. Examples of that are making sure my house is clean, then worrying about that it's not clean enough. I have hard time doing basic tasks like doing the laundry, I have to smell each piece of clothing before I'm able to fold it. My fiance tries to help with basic cleaning duties around the house, while that may seem helpful it stresses me out because he doesn't do it the way I feel it should be done. I feel bad when he tries to help because I'm right there behind him re doing what he attempted to help with. I don't have the greatest handle on my finances which triggers my OCD so therefore I feel out of control and try to control the things I can like making sure everything is clean and orderly.
ROCD Hey me again sorry. I don’t know much about ROCD, can anyone tell me if this might be it? I have POCD and it’s the worst thing in the world. Whilst I enjoy intimacy with my husband, sometimes when he holds my hand or rubs my back it feels “boring” or “annoying” and like I’m not really attracted to him and my mind tells me I enjoy hugging my Kid more and holding her hand, not in a sexual way but it scares me that something I used to love feels irritating. Like he’ll reach for me and I’ll shy away because his touch feels annoying. My mind compares it and I get intrusive thoughts thinking I’d rather be hugging a kid or something but it makes me feel sick I’d never want to hurt a child Is this an ocd symptom? Just wondering sorry if I haven’t explained it well
possible ROCD? a vent - read if you want to, I need advice as well. I just feel overwhelmingly sad and scared - - - i love her but why does it seem as though I don't and i'm scared of that thought what if i like other people, seeing other people makes me scared, cause i do not want feelings for anyone else but her, she's special to me. and i don't want to make it seem like i don't love her anymore when i really do. i just don't want to lose someone special do i love her for her? or do i just love her for something else. what if i'm just lying to myself. why am i asking these things. i feel like a horrible person i don't know what to do i'm so lost, i feel so bad that we have to go through this, i feel so bad for having to think like this why am i this way, we were fine before, why did the thoughts and feelings come to ruin it. i need my head to be clear but i can't seem to do that either. I'm so lost still lost even if we're taking a break why can't i get answers? why can't i think straight, why can't i just feel love without worrying again, feeling certain we'll love til we're old I always had faith in us, but why am i so scared that if i look at other people i'll feel attracted to them, when i really don't wanna love anyone else. I just want to love her, why is that so hard all of the sudden? I don't want to seem like i'm stuck in this relationship, cause i'm not. this relationship is my life, my happiness my everything she is my everything, but why am i so scared, why can't i trust myself, why do these uncomfortable feelings hit me these thoughts that pop up and just scare me or just make me question myself after, do i love her? why did i think of that, why did i think of this other person what is WRONG with me. I'm so scared, I just want to love her and only her. she's my life. and i'm scared that i'm just ruining it now, i'm scared to lose her i'm scared to lose myself and not love her anymore. I don't know, i really don't
im panicking really bad, me and my sister came to yuma to visit a family friend & my brother told us very clearly “don’t go it’s raining” or drive safe bc of highway parol. and what happened ??? we got pulled over and now im panicking bc what if he’s trying to tell us to go back home bc he’s sensing something else is gonna happen. i’ve been scared the whole way on this trip bc my thoughts have been absolutely terrible & now my thoughts are being linked to this situation and im terrified somethings gonna happen
Hocd/tw* Theres no way in hell im not gay, im literally finding dudes attractive, i saw two today, i caught a glance but got so anxious and uncomfortable that i avoided looking at their face fully but as soon as i see a dude my brain starts planning the whole story that im gonna fall in love, do sweet things together etc etc. Its just scaring me that Im having a bad identity crisis and not only im realizing im gay but also transgender or a weak masculine man. I fucking hate this, i can even accept being gay, but trans? It feels like I know thats true too but could never accept it. Is it possible i lived 21 years without realizing im not truly a man? Again it feels like I know the answer to it but want it to be different. Fml man
you spend your whole life creating values and following them without any doubt that you are a good person, and then you are diagnosed with ocd, you start to doubt everything, literally everything, you don't recognize yourself anymore, you are afraid of yourself, you suffer from being in your own mind, you are afraid to approach people, and no one sees it, it's a pain that no one can feel for you, no one can take away from you, it's incredibly exhausting
ive had a lot of intrusive thoughts about racism, homophobia and transphobia, but recently im scared im misogynistic. im a trans guy, ftm, and gay. i struggle with rocd, especially over my partner leaving me for someone better or prettier or hotter. we recently watched Chicago, a great movie we both really like. but through out it my partner was pointing out all the hot woman, and it made me really anxious. and now everytime i see someone ik my partner would think is hot i get bad intrusive thoughts that seem misogynistic to me. im scared that this isnt my ocd talking and that i really am this horrible person. my partner is allowed to find people attractive, im not upset at them at all. now im scared im a misogynist and that i hate woman, and im going back and thinking about all the times ive had a negative outlook on a girl before and drawing conclusions that im pretty sure arent even there. i know its probably just ego dystonic thoughts but, im scared. not to mention i cant look at Chicago the same anymore because it reminds me of the anxiety i felt does anyone know any ways to calm down or remind yourself that this isnt really who you are? any help at all?
My Rocd is a horrible nightmare... because of my endless intrusive thoughts and compulsions I feel always sad, down and lonely. I feel like I don't belong here... I am so tired to prepare lunch, take a bath, get ready to go out. I am married and as a result I feel like a bad wife and mother. I find ut difficult to get up in the morning, organise my chores, get involved in daily issues in general. I feel like I am the worst person ever being so incapable and seem lazy all the time. I really want to be energetic and do everything to contribute to my family but right now everything seems so distant. Please any advice would be helpful...I feel.really bad right now...
Hey; I read before a really good question with no answers. Can someone answers? It was something like " I don't know what to do, because one day I want to stay with her, the next one I don't want to stay. " He was talking about intrusive doubts, because he couldn't understand what he really wants. Now is someone in a situation similar? What should I do (because yes, I am in this situation too!)? Is this even rocd related?
how do you not let ocd ruin things you enjoy? like if you have an intrusive thought while watching something you like or something you like triggers your ocd? does ERP help with that? i cant help but feel weird or uncomfortable when something that has tiggered me is talked about. or if i watched my favorite show and then got triggered i feel like that thing i like is ruined now :[
im pretty positive i have rOCD. ive had a lot of intrusive thoughts about the future and every possible thing that could go wrong, and my partner knows i experience this quite often. but recently ive started to become very jealous :[ im a gay trans guy [he/him] , and my partner is pan and agender [they/them]. one of the things we do most together is watch tv shows and movies we both enjoy. pointing out characters we think are attractive or hot has never been an issue for me until recently. they will point out a girl they think is hot, and i get extremely anxious or jealous. but its only when they point out girl, and im not sure why it affects me so much. but now beacuse i cant find anyone who experiences the EXACT SAME ISSUE, ive somehow convinced myself im misogynistic and panphobic. i dont know how i came to this conclusion, but i did. it feels just as absurd as it sounds, but then i worry thats actually the case. i dont know what to do or how to help myself, i tried to just tell myself that its okay to feel jealous sometimes, but i keep circling back to the worst possible scenario, like us possibly breaking up or me being a terrible person. i dont know what to do, does anyone know any ways i can calm myself down without seeking reassurance feom my partner? :[[
I have to keep posting and venting daily otherwise the anxiety, depressive and ßuicidal feelings intensify really fast and become unbearable and suffocating. Ive lost my mind because of this sexual obsession, my brain is unable to think, its causing me really negative feelings that my attraction to women was fake for 20 years and i didnt realize it, wtf. The more homosexual i feel the less masculine i feel sick.
On Thursday night after being out with the family I got a horrible feeling of being hyper aware in my own body. The same existential doubts proceeded. Is my life fake? Is my life a simulation? Are other people real? Am I crazy and nobody has the heart to tell me? I decided to just color in a coloring book, think about what I wanted to do this weekend, & not find the answer. The questions OCD asks are not real questions. Relapses are normal. You just know what to do now. Stay strong.
It feels like my mind or ocd now is attracted to any and everything thats bad. Its forcing me to think like the exact opposite of the person that i am. Every time i see something bad or concerning happen whether its on the news or social media i think normally at first, but then my mind tries to make me second guess and think i like the bad thing thats happening and it scares me. Its destroying me right now. Does anybody else go through this? Does this go away/get better?
How do i cope with ocd causing separation anxiety i get these thoughts that’s like scenarios that my mom or grandmother die and stuff and i hate it i tried getting a necklace with my mom picture in it so when i’m not at home ill feel better but it didn’t help. any suggestions?