Does anyone else just feel like they don't wanna be alive anymore because of ocd like I want to just not be here anymore but I'm to afriad to die and and everyday I keep dealing with ocd every day of every second and it just keeps feeling worse and worse can anyone help or relate
Suicidal OCD - Community
Suicidal OCD is truly horrible. There’s so much overlap between ideation and obsession with this. A sufferer truly can’t tell the difference because of all of the conflicting information between the two. ERP for this makes it difficult because it’s like, you “accept” the thoughts, but yet if you do that, you’re also told to seek help immediately. How do you sit with these thoughts, and also how do you get on the other side of this when you’re instructed to react the complete opposite regarding this topic? I feel like I go in circles because of this and it’s so hard to judge.
Do you feel like your not doing enough in your exposures? Maybe you get a trigger that really scares you and you feel like you need to lean in and go further into that as an exposure otherwise your OCD will get worse. That is your OCD talking. Trust me, stick to the exposures that you have been assigned with your therapist and try new ones with them so they can help you through. I overdid and exposure last week and scared myself really bad and it sent me into a spiral. My therapist was super understanding and helped me realize I don't have to tackle my worst fears all at once, it takes time. Do you start training for a marathon by running 20 miles, or maybe just 1 first? If your OCD tells you that you aren't doing enough, tell it to shut up and you're coming for it eventually.
TW TW: SOCD:::: Does anyone have intrusive thoughts without the anxiety. Like the intrusive thoughts turn comforting? At first I’ll begin with an obsession about giving myself an autopsy and obsess over visuals and senses. (I tried to use the potentially least triggering obsession I’ve had for a reason) I’ll feel ashamed and alone and anxious. It will consume my life causing me to space out during classes or work to think of these obsessions. When I come back to reality, I always got super anxious that someone could read my thoughts or somehow someone would figure out what i was thinking about. After a while, the obsession turns from anxiety provoking to comforting. Like when I am stressed out from life I turn to these obsessions to feel comfort. Does anyone else feel this way?
For 2 years i have very big mental problem.I always think very intense about one person.I cant stop thinking about him.When i go to bed, when i go to college ,when i wake up i always think about him.When i see him i get very strange feeling .Every night i dream of him watching me.I wake up everytime sweaty.Sometimes i am very afraid when i go to bed because i dont know what will happen.I started doing everything like him.My thoughts are all about what he will say.I dont know what to think now.I cant describe my mental pain..I just want to live again.I started to think that my life has no meaning and that only solution would be..
The last couple days have been difficult. I’ve had a lot of intrusive thoughts about death and dying, I’ve been doing a lot of checking compulsions to “see if” I agree with the thoughts or not. It’s been hard to sit with uncertainty when I’m feeling kind of down about other things already. I’ve just started erp, any advice or insight?
Each day living is getting difficult even though I have everything to eat.. a house to live in.. books to read.. a family. Yet I have terrible relations and I fear everyone will leave me or a day will come that I will have to leave everyone. A 24 yr old girl who aspires to become a civil servant but today feeling like a failure and burden. Why? Why do I feel so anxious, angry on what people did to me or why my behaviour was not normal like other kids who now have graduated from top IITs, medical colleges or top NLUs and I'm in my bed hiding my face in fear that I'm someone who won't be able to survive. Please help me. Please. I want to build a strong career but I'm already 24 and have severe OCD. No one knows and feels it except for me. People in past have said that you only overthink but my impulsive behaviour.. repeating things again and again.. my obsessions and compulsions have distorted the way a normal individual could think. I dont have money to pay for ERP therepy but I need help. I'll pay off as soon as I get hired. It may take around 2-3 years. So I dont think I'm going to get any support anyhow. I know this platform is good that's why I came here. Please help
Imo suicidal ocd is one the hardest themes to deal with. Becuase it feels like it could be real because killing yourself can be a result of a mental illness. It's just difficult becuase I don't know if I actually want to, or if it's ocd. This just makes it hard. I've had this theme for over a year, no self harm or attempts or anything but what if I want to. I don't wish I were dead. All I want is to be happy. HOW do I deal with this theme?? Any advice? Please??
Hey y’all, I’m new here. Nervous about getting started. Been dealing with OCD for 20ish years now. Feels like I do okay for awhile then it hits hard out of nowhere. I deal with suicidal/harm OCD which is the hardest theme I feel like for me. Also have dealt with existential ocd, false memory ocd, religious ocd, image ocd, perfectionism ocd….I don’t like the long list, but it’s been my reality. Looking forward to starting ERP, but honestly scared!
Hoping and praying everyone has a great day and even when it’s the darkest of the dark shit thoughts just power thru and focus on something else, ur brain isn’t you, and even if u keep digging deeper just know it rlly isn’t u, there just thoughts, I struggle with terrible hocd, rocd and ocd everyday but I have faith that it’ll get better i will keep y’all in my prayers