Angel_Marin16

Date posted: 3y

I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO!! I’m having a panic attack how my body believes that it’s gay! Because I woke up and I was just shaking because of the intrusive thoughts. I am scared of becoming gay. Yet, I’m not really freaking out a lot, I’m just shaking and saying, “did I turn gay? I don’t want to be gay!” Im currently trying to think about the intrusive thoughts to see if I’d get something from it. But I’m not! Which I’m glad. However, my mind is still bazerk right now. It’s irregular for me because whenever I think the intrusive thoughts, I start having a anxiety attack, but this time I’m not! Im shaking and I don’t know what to do. WHAT IS GOING ON!!!!

Sexual Orientation OCD

erin174

Date posted: 3y

So it sounds like you’re worried about not being worried about the thoughts. This is a completely normal part of OCD. I think it’s called a kickback or something. It’s part of the loop of OCD. You freak out, your brain adjusts (not meaning you’ve become what you’re stressing about; just that your brain has learned to handle the thoughts better), you freak out because you’re not freaking out, repeat. It’s definitely not fun, but it doesn’t mean the thoughts are true. Wishing you the best! I know it’s tough.

Angel_Marin16

Date posted: 3y

So is this whole thing is normal?

erin174

Date posted: 3y

@Angel_Marin16 Well if it’s not, then you and I are both abnormal together haha I don’t want to give you reassurance, but this has happened to me (and many others) multiple times and I never became or did anything I was worried about. I hope you feel better soon, friend!

Anonymous

Date posted: 3y

I’ve felt what you have. Still do from time to time. I know it’s hard. I really understand your pain. What has helped me out (when I’m not having my panic attacks) is doing word searches or some type of focused based activity. It’s not for distraction, thoughts will probably still be there, as they have for me. But what I have noticed is that I tend not to worry about the thoughts as much when doing the word searches. They’re there, I say “yup.. cool story bro” and continue doing the word search. Put a show on in the background and try it out. Hope this helps friend. Stay strong. You’re not alone

Angel_Marin16

Date posted: 3y

Oh thank you 🙏 you really don’t know how much this helps I’ve been dealing with this for about 2 weeks and I’m only 13 years old and I’ve stopped doing the stuff I love since. I might go to a physiatrist maybe this week. Also, since I’m young I feel like this stuff is not normal, it’s changed me and my mind my one wish is to be happy for thanksgiving and for Christmas, I don’t want to live like this. I’m new to this app and to this OCD so idk what I’m doing 😂 I’ve never been attracted to men my entire life, and since I’ve had anxiety for years now, I guess I have the tendency to overthink and other stuff. And again, thank you. 😁

Anonymous

Date posted: 3y

@Angel_Marin16 Seek help. If you can talk to your parents and see if you can get a therapist. Sorry you’re going through this at a young age and can’t imagine how difficult it must be. Talk to your parents and see if you can get some help bud. Stay safe

Angel_Marin16

Date posted: 3y

@Anonymous Thanks! 🙏

Angel_Marin16

Date posted: 3y

@Anonymous Also, I have another question, can this OCD turn you gay? Becuase like I said earlier, I’m not attracted to men. So, can this OCD turn you gay?? Because I’ve been searching and I’ve gotten results 😂

Anonymous

Date posted: 3y

You’re looking for reassurance and that will only make it worse. Normal for OCD. But trust me, you don’t want to fall deeper in this hell hole. Stop researching. If you feel you have to look up stuff, sit with the anxiety and uncertainty. Go for a walk, talk to someone, anything... but don’t search. Be strong bud

Angel_Marin16

Date posted: 3y

Oh ok sorry I didn’t know that

Anonymous

Date posted: 3y

@Angel_Marin16 It’s okay 😊 Believe it when I say that reassurance doesn’t help. If it did, none of us would be here lol. Stay away from the internet, don’t read forums, don’t look up stories, don’t compare. None of that. Don’t push the thoughts away, acknowledge the thoughts, say “yup, cool” or “yup whatever” and move on. The deeper you get the harder it is to get out. Trust me. Talk to your parents to get some professional help. That’s always best. Stay strong

Angel_Marin16

Date posted: 3y

@Anonymous I just have one more question, (it might be unimportant to the OCD or something idk) why do I feel like I will get an erection even though I’m not thinking about the intrusive thoughts?? Or is it just my body lol

djh123

Date posted: 3y

@Angel_Marin16 - That's called "groinal reaction" and it happens sometimes.

Angel_Marin16

Date posted: 3y

@djh123 So for example: if I see/think about a man, my groinal response feels likes it’s starting to have an erection or it has one even though I don’t like these thoughts that I’m having

Angel_Marin16

Date posted: 3y

@Anonymous What does it mean when you sometimes don't get aroused when you see or think about women when you have HOCD. I’m heterosexual, and I’m not gay. But I sometimes I can’t get aroused by women. Is this my fault? Or is it the OCD???

Dreamydream

Date posted: 18w

TOCD

2 nights ago I saw something on my phone and it has now spiraled into me scared of being trans or being gay because i don’t want to be… now i have a huge fear of what if i am gay and am attracted to woman or what if im not comfortable in my body and want to turn into a man. It’s freaking me out - my ocd always makes me question my character! Has anyone experienced this 😩

g_rangel

Date posted: 18w

spiraling again.

i had recently been triggered to have so-ocd. its been on my mind non-stop. (i am a heterosexual female) and my mind has been all over the place questioning if i have been in denial the entire time. ive always had people tell me they sort of got that vibe it it never really affected me until my own mother had her suspicions. so i would constantly get triggered un public around the same gender, while knowing my true sexuality. ive always been attracted to men but as of recently ive been having super bad anxiety to where i cannot eat or sleep and feel weak all the time. it was like that for a week or so. now im in the calm where i have been trying accept the uncertainty but it still isnt fair as im getting triggered. im a little worried because it feels like i have been lying to my parents the entire time although ive never had the desire to be with the same gender. and i keep getting intrusive thoguhts that make me feel anxious and uncomfortable. its all starting to affect my friendships as im constantly getting triggered with the intrusive thoguhts. i feel a little less anxious compared to how i was a couple days ago. im really scared on why im having these thoughts now when i have been having romantic feelings for a guy the past year or so. ive also been struggling with false attraction and loss attraction to men. it makes me feel uncertain of my life the entire time

user74128588493

Date posted: 16w

hocd

i have had intense thoughts and fears about being gay today and i have been sick to my stomach. it just stopped and now im scared im accepting it and im not freaking out. i feel like im okay with it. I AM NOT OKAY WITH BEING GAY.

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