I am feeling helpless and so torn…Idk why but it’s starting to feel a little too real and i am always just hanging in between which is like feeling similar for the the opp sex and the same which makes me believe in what i am denying or am i even denying?!? Like I can’t differentiate whats true what not cause all this feels very true natural and how it should have always been but i am just realising and this is the process where everyone is anxious at first and then become normal with it?!? Like thats how it happens with people who are in denial too right like how do i tell myself i am not in denial and when someone says i am straight how do i believe it with so many proofs and then I actually don’t believe it cause the opp feels more believable than this and if thats the case doesn’t it say that yes i have been avoiding it and what for if i am not scared and okay with it but am i truly like if i even consider this an option that says something about this right?!? What do i do?!?

Thankyou but its so hard to believe anything anyone says because what i feel feels so real that i just don’t know what to do and i feel like i get a thought naturally and then i force myself to think about it cause like that relieves me and makes me still think it as ocd while knowing that it might not be like what am i even supposed to do?

@Brave through It’s hard for me as well , I haven’t started ERP and CBT but I’m going to , but it’s not a real worry , I know it feels real but it’s just something your OCD is using to play you

@henriquefortini I am glad to know i am not alone in this cause this is torture feeling like it feels so real and sometimes i think i am the only one woth such extremities and thats why mines like true and other have ocd and not me cause like after a while the anxiety stopped it started feeling real and everything else that i do for reassurance didn’t relieve me and started to feel forced am I supposed to feel this way when i have ocd?

@Brave through Yes , everything that OCD is going to is to make you feel bad , I had many topics of OCD like POCD and Harm OCD and I thought I was going crazy , this one is hard because it all feels so real but I just remind myself what I’ve always liked for once in a while , which is being straight and enjoying being with girls and that’s what makes me happy not the current state which I am right now

@henriquefortini On here someone said thy after erp and when i am done recovering from my fears i can explore my sexuality but like I don’t understand why would i be okay with that idea am i ?!? Am i sacred cause i shouod be because this is supposed to be triggering and i am not what do i take from that and also the fact that if I consider that as an option what does that prove? Like my fears are actually true and like if i am supposed to know later and okay with that idea why don’t i know now or do I actually know and don’t wanna accept it?!? Like what is it these thoughts feel too real and nothing like what it felt when I actually like guys that itself says a lof?!? And if i am okay with not knowing what is that then if i am okay with this idea of knowing later what do i do then? There are just so many questions and no answers what if i want to explore later and me just saying that means there’s some truth in it isn’t it? And like all this was a lie cause i was faking it?

@Brave through If you actually want to explore it later in life you can but you are not if it’s something that makes you scared like OCD , you’re clearly not someone right now who is willing to explore their sexuality, someone who is willing to do that actually has curiosity and good feelings by doing that , not someone who feels scared and bad with that idea

@henriquefortini I agree but i still tend to question everything and never get the answer to the question am I actually staright? Do i believe in the answer do i even want to believe in it? Like idk what to do? Do i want to accept it and these questions make me think if i have so many doubts about this and will i be able to accept it or not proves my fears could be actually true at this point i don’t even know who i am and that honestly scares me

@Brave through It scares me as well and I know it’s hard to do this but try to think of yourself the day before this came , you were happy and not questioning your sexuality