- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Calm down , it’s just OCD playing you , you still have the anxiety for not feeling anxiety , you’re straight , don’t worry
- Date posted
- 3y
Thankyou but its so hard to believe anything anyone says because what i feel feels so real that i just don’t know what to do and i feel like i get a thought naturally and then i force myself to think about it cause like that relieves me and makes me still think it as ocd while knowing that it might not be like what am i even supposed to do?
- Date posted
- 3y
@Brave through It’s hard for me as well , I haven’t started ERP and CBT but I’m going to , but it’s not a real worry , I know it feels real but it’s just something your OCD is using to play you
- Date posted
- 3y
@henriquefortini I am glad to know i am not alone in this cause this is torture feeling like it feels so real and sometimes i think i am the only one woth such extremities and thats why mines like true and other have ocd and not me cause like after a while the anxiety stopped it started feeling real and everything else that i do for reassurance didn’t relieve me and started to feel forced am I supposed to feel this way when i have ocd?
- Date posted
- 3y
@Brave through Yes , everything that OCD is going to is to make you feel bad , I had many topics of OCD like POCD and Harm OCD and I thought I was going crazy , this one is hard because it all feels so real but I just remind myself what I’ve always liked for once in a while , which is being straight and enjoying being with girls and that’s what makes me happy not the current state which I am right now
- Date posted
- 3y
@henriquefortini On here someone said thy after erp and when i am done recovering from my fears i can explore my sexuality but like I don’t understand why would i be okay with that idea am i ?!? Am i sacred cause i shouod be because this is supposed to be triggering and i am not what do i take from that and also the fact that if I consider that as an option what does that prove? Like my fears are actually true and like if i am supposed to know later and okay with that idea why don’t i know now or do I actually know and don’t wanna accept it?!? Like what is it these thoughts feel too real and nothing like what it felt when I actually like guys that itself says a lof?!? And if i am okay with not knowing what is that then if i am okay with this idea of knowing later what do i do then? There are just so many questions and no answers what if i want to explore later and me just saying that means there’s some truth in it isn’t it? And like all this was a lie cause i was faking it?
- Date posted
- 3y
@Brave through If you actually want to explore it later in life you can but you are not if it’s something that makes you scared like OCD , you’re clearly not someone right now who is willing to explore their sexuality, someone who is willing to do that actually has curiosity and good feelings by doing that , not someone who feels scared and bad with that idea
- Date posted
- 3y
@henriquefortini I agree but i still tend to question everything and never get the answer to the question am I actually staright? Do i believe in the answer do i even want to believe in it? Like idk what to do? Do i want to accept it and these questions make me think if i have so many doubts about this and will i be able to accept it or not proves my fears could be actually true at this point i don’t even know who i am and that honestly scares me
- Date posted
- 3y
@Brave through It scares me as well and I know it’s hard to do this but try to think of yourself the day before this came , you were happy and not questioning your sexuality
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w
im so scared that this is just denial and that im actuall gay. idk what to do anymore i need help. its just constant anxiety in my chest and i hate it. is there anything i can do to help?
- Date posted
- 11w
So I’m afraid that I have HOCD, but at the same time that I might also be homosexual. Is that possible? I have all the typical compulsions… checking for attraction, analyzing thoughts, analyzing the past, analyzing emotions, searching the internet. Is it really HOCD? When I see anything related to LGBT, I get strongly triggered. Sometimes I observe how my body reacts around people, but most often I check with ChatGPT to calm myself down, although it doesn’t last long—it depends. I also compare myself to other straight women who look like lesbians, or to lesbians who look like they’re straight. I had a phase where I was analyzing my body… whether I have too much hair, whether I have an Adam’s apple, whether I act like a lesbian without realizing it. I also have the typical intrusive thoughts like “did something from the past actually mean something, or is it a sign?” “am I just lying to myself?” “what if I’m in denial?” “what if I’ve ignored signs my whole life and lied to myself?” “what if I’ll never be able to fall in love with a guy?” “what if there are too many signs and proofs and it’s true?” “what if it’s not HOCD at all?” And much more. But now I’m scared that it’s both—that I have HOCD and that I’m homosexual. I’ve cried multiple times because of this and it’s been going on for 7 months. Some days are better, some are worse. And there’s so much ‘evidence’ that I won’t even list now—over these seven months I’ve found so many things from my past and dreams that I feel like there has to be something to it. I’ve also had around four panic attacks because of this. And I truly believe I have HOCD and that I’m also homosexual, which is killing me and it feels horrible. I just want to be sure that im straight and be at peace. When im doubting and thinking that im a lesbian i feel like im not at peace and i hate it. But u feel like i just need to accept it but i don’t want to and i just want to have a boyfriend, kids but im scared that it’s not possible for me because im lesbian and i actually just think that i want a boyfriend but in reality i don’t. Ughhhh help me.
- Date posted
- 10w
I feel like the thoughts and feelings are getting stronger, to the point where they feel like they are my own and that I want them and want them to happen. Recently I’ve even had feelings of ‘wanting to be gay’ and that I ‘don’t want to be straight’, or that being with a woman would be nice even though that’s literally the one thing I don’t want otherwise I wouldn’t be constantly thinking about it day after day surely and if I wanted it I would just know? I feel numb and sick and terrified that I’ll just be what I’ve feared all this time. Why does my brain do this. I feel like I’ve lost so much already, I couldn’t concentrate on university work and I’ve had to delay my degree for a year, I’ve lost my purpose, and I feel so ashamed that I can’t tell anyone the real reason for it (I just told everyone the course was too much stress and was causing me anxiety) and it just feels like it’s getting worse to the point that it’s actually coming true, and I’m going to have to leave my boyfriend because I can’t be with him anymore. Why do the thoughts sometimes feel good? Why does it feel like real attraction? Why why why does it feel like DISAPPOINTMENT with the idea of never being with a woman wtf this is literally what I don’t want and never have? Even just writing that out my brain is telling me ‘it is’ and ‘I’m lying’ and I just can’t even believe myself anymore. I’ve tried telling myself the whole maybe maybe not but it just doesn’t work. It feels like if I accept I like woman I’ll want to be with one and leave him. Why does the idea of being with a man not fill me with excitement like it used to why do labels terrify me I genuinely just want to give up I still haven’t even told anyone about this cause I just feel like they won’t understand and that they will just think I’m struggling with my sexuality and the worst thing is I don’t even know what I want anymore cause of the thoughts and feelings I don’t know what to believe what if I am actually just struggling with my sexuality cause nothing feels right anymore
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