I’m not sure if it’s insomnia but I haven’t been sleeping very good lately. I’ve been going to sleep around 3-5 in the morning because I just can’t seem to go to sleep at a decent time and the next day I’m really tired (unless I have coffee) but isn’t insomnia where you don’t sleep for multiple days at a time? But one of the side affects of my medication is insomnia so I wonder if that’s what’s causing it or stress. I do know that so much is bothering me right now. It’s my first Christmas without my dad he passed in February of this year and I wish he was here. Also just OCD itself is too much right now for me to handle with some mistakes from my past bothering me, intrusive thoughts sometimes that bother me although I’m starting to handle them better it’s mostly the real life stuff that’s bringing me down. People keep asking what I want for Christmas and I keep telling them nothing but they don’t understand that I feel like I don’t deserve anything and that I would feel guilty if they got me anything. I feel like I’m living a complete nightmare. I just want to be free.

OCDHaver

Date posted: 4y

If people really won’t leave you alone for Christmas presents, I is usually just tell people for a pair of socks, something that they don’t need to go out of there way to get I suppose. And I’ve always seen insomnia as anytime you’re having a lot of sleep disturbances that cause you to sleep less. I’d definitely count what you’re going through as insomnia

Magzzz

Date posted: 4y

I don’t want anything at all. Nothing. I know I’ve posted about real event ocd before and I think you’ve commented a couple times so maybe you know what’s bothering me but I’m consumed with so much guilt and regret because a mistake I made a few years ago and it didn’t cross my mind at the time. I’m trying to be positive like oh you were younger and you didn’t know what you were doing yada yada but then it feels like I’m just making excuses. I wish I could go back so bad. But anyways ok that’s what I thought. It definitely seems to be insomnia. The reason why I’m thinking it is, is because I told a friend of mine this morning about how I haven’t been sleeping good and then he asked if I had insomnia so. Definitely makes sense

OCDHaver

Date posted: 4y

@Just Breathe ❤️ I struggle A LOT with real event, mostly a lot of gross things I did when I was younger and even recently on my time on dating apps when I was 18. I know how you feel, it’s awful, but one thing I’ve learned from refusing to let other get me a gift is that it makes that feeling of guilt or stress that you put on them worse. So I just try and accept the bare minimum because refusing might make things worse. I’m sorry you’re going through this, and I have read about your real event on one of your posts. I understand how painful it is, but you’re not like that anymore, all your posts show you’re not. I hope you’re able to get better sleep

Magzzz

Date posted: 4y

@OCDHaver I never had any bad intentions. Ever. I was just stupid. I should have known. But it doesn’t do any good to dwell on it I guess. It just hurts.

Magzzz

Date posted: 4y

@OCDHaver Thank you I’m gonna try. I’m tired so maybe I will be able too

Rainbow sky!!

Date posted: 3y

I do the same thing I’m up till 3 to 5 and get up round 2 to 3 so my bf works seconds shifts to be on this schedule I try really hard to get on a normal schedule but I just can’t but I like going to the store when there’s noone there cause it’s so late and there’s no ppl driveing round I like that bout this schedule I do have kids though they live wit my mom cause when mt husband left me I couldn’t handle me ocd and the kids by myself so I miss alot of stuff wit them cause I’m in bed but if they have stuff in the evening I go to them.

Rainbow sky!!

Date posted: 3y

I’ve never met someone that does this to I wasn’t always like this I’ve been like this for a few years though I always feel really sick in the morning when I get up early the sun lite the way it looks and feels no matter the amount of time I was in bed it’s always made me nauseas feeling my entire life but now that it’s getting darker earlier it makes me depressed that I can’t get up and be ready in time to go outside to do stuff in the daylite it’s dark by like 5 o’clock here it’s very hard on me and makes me feel very shitty bout myself I beat myself up bout it all the time if I was just normal I could get up I’m worthless I suck at life all kinds of stuff.

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