- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I am definitely no expert but I have suffered from ROCD tons. I have dated my partner for 7 years. We have a super healthy relationship but as we got closer to getting engaged I started having more obsessions and ROCD thoughts. It was so scary! I have been in therapy working on this. The other thing that helped me was being open and honest with my partner about my obsession theme (while being mindful about not using this honesty to perform compulsions, such as divulging my thoughts to him as a way to relieve anxiety). He has a good understanding of what OCD is so he was able to hear what I was going through without feeling threatened by my thoughts. This has brought me a lot of comfort and support. I would suggest talking to your therapist about how to manage this with your partner in mind!
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes. Toughts really affect your feelings! If you keep testing yourself; it will only get worse! I was in the same place some times ago and this lead me to apathy, sadness and guilty feelings!! But remember that things will get really better once you understand how to treat those thoughts/emotions! Now I feel everything again! And it is beautiful!!
- Date posted
- 3y
But how do I get out of this…? I’m stuck… 😞 Why is it only random that I get happy and know I love him? It’s constantly with theses feelings… whenever he mentions sex I get anxiety and I feel like I don’t want it.. everything feels forced. I’ve never felt this way for him… I want it to be consistent that I know I love him and I want to be able to touch him without feeling like I am forcing of faking it… 😞 it’s like 11 years have never happened and it’s driving me nuts… bc deep down I know I love and wanna stay but it’s everyday with this… I freaking hate it… 😞 there are times I can show affection with feeling fake but why can’t I be that way all the time… sorry I am just really sad…
- Date posted
- 3y
@Mandy7710 I know that feeling. Here we all know. You are not alone, and you can get out of this, always remember it. I'm not a psychologist; or a therapist. You should talk to one of them, they surely can understand your situation and help you better!! Anyway, talking from experience, I think it is really personal! You should give yourself some time to try different methods, and find the one that works better for you! Erp works really well usually, cbt too, there are some apps that help you to have positive thinking or better habits... really there are a lot of opportunities!! For me was a "combo" of everything... at first I started to talk with a psychologist, that helped me to understand a lot of bad habits (mental too; like ruminations, rationalising, etc) and than I started to heal all those things!
- Date posted
- 3y
@Mandy7710 A lot of people get their rocd worse when the relationship start to be more serious... maby it is also your case! I learned also that rocd strikes only on what it is really important for you! Try to avoid every compulsion! (All those actions that make you feel better for a little time; for me was telling my bf my doubts). Don't be scared about feeling less or nothing. It doesn't means NOTHING. Just be happy (for now) that some times you feel in love!! That is beautiful! I would also suggest to explain to your bf what rocd is! In that way he wouldn't misunderstand your behaviour for something else, and then you can fight it togheter!
- Date posted
- 3y
@Saraa I know I need help… I just miss knowing if I truly love him… 😞 it’s like I don’t know… then when I have moments where I do know I am really happy like last night he made homemade French toast and I hugged him and everything. Even told him I love him. I know getting help is the only true way I can learn to deal with this.
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 23w
I’ve had so many moments of clarity with my OCD that I love my boyfriend and I’m beyond willing to go through this to be better and be with him. in the back of mind I’ve in a way known I was at least somewhat sexually attracted to women (I’m a woman) since the start of the ocd it was always like “okay. Fine, but I don’t want to date a girl” I only just realized this after the ocd started, I never really argued with this. my ocd has always revolved around if I’m romantically interested in women and not men. I’ve done so many compulsions through this year and a half and 9 times out of 10 have come to the conclusion that I don’t want to be with a woman romantically. I always end up feeling like I know I love my boyfriend. But the doubts don’t stop about whether I want to spend my life with a woman instead, my heart literally breaks to think of not being with my bf and imagining him with someone else. I don’t want to be with a woman I know deep down somewhere underneath the anxiety that that’s not what I want. It doesn’t feel natural for me, unfulfilling. I want to tell my boyfriend about the possible sexual attraction to women (ik it’s still ocd related) but I’m scared that once I tell him, I’ll realize that I actually do want to be with women and not with him. Ugh I’ve spent hours today ruminating about this after being solid in my commitment with him for a little while, I’m stuck in this loop and idk how to get out right now
- Date posted
- 22w
These past few days I was fine. Minimal intrusive thoughts ,no anxiety etc(to add I'm on medication so maybe it's starting to work although it barely is 2 weeks) and today I got a sudden wave of anxiety and it started latching on some thoughts like" what if I'm in denial and I wanna break up with my bf? And what if erp doesn't work for me because I actually wanna break up with my bf?" But they didn't really stay long usually those thoughts would make me spiral for days or so, now they lasted for some hours. And now I'm trying to trigger myself into being anxious again because if I don't it means I don't have ocd and if I don't have ocd it means I don't love my bf and if I don't love my bf it means I have to break up. Idk if it makes sense but the lack of anxiety makes me wonder if I actually have ocd or not.
- Date posted
- 15w
Does anyone else experience a moment of clarity where you feel strong relief that the intrusive thought isn’t true, only to then immediately start questioning if you’ve only convinced yourself that because you don’t want the thought to be true? I’m pretty confident it would take some crazy mental gymnastics to actually successfully convince myself I didn’t do something that I deep down knew I did, but every time I resist the compulsions and try to sit with the uncertainty or tell myself to think about what is logical, I usually briefly know that this probably didn’t happen but am unable to move on out of fear I’m just in denial and have convinced myself of that.
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