I hate that I only know I love my partner randomly… I cried in my car bc I want to love him. I do when I feel better I know I love him. It’s just it feels like 11 years never happened at all and I hate it a lot… 😞 I wanna be close again but then I get strange sensations when I do try to get close or I start to feel guilt. I just feel like I am in denial…. I don’t wanna end it. Like right now I don’t feel like I love him anymore….😞 obsessing about it for over a year I started to believe it as truth… everyone around me can see how much I love him. Why can’t i…