TW I can’t I can’t do this. I can’t go on I’m terrified to go To sleep I love my guy despite the fact that he’s technically not my guy OK there’s no technicality but I’m not going to detail there. I don’t wanna different guy and I again just don’t want to get into it. But I’m frightened I feel funny keep smiling I’m scared that I keep shrugging and saying oh guess I do it like everything is changing I don’t like boobs I don’t understand! I don’t like the way I smiled and shrugged in such a nonchalant fashion saying yes I do when I don’t like boobs and I feel wrong thing I don’t and I keep shopping like I guess what I don’t like boobs there’s no guessing so I can’t I stop smiling and feeling warm and hollow and hot in my chest I don’t need a guess I know I don’t like boobs yeah every time imagine a guy and I’m frightened I feel weird and charged like I do I don’t like pointy boobs they’re not hot or sexy I’m scared I don’t like boobs but every time I try to imagine a guy it turns into something like hanging I don’t like boobs and I keep a matching much bigger guys but I’m not satisfied when I look at much bigger guys. I’m scared my guy is he’s not scrawny he’s not huge but he’s not scrawny and I don’t care in front of you but when I look at much bigger more muscular harder muscles like built guys I don’t like it. I keep saying I guess and I don’t like it why am I feeling hot and bubbly in my chest I don’t wanna change it I will start liking boobs I want the stuff to go away I CANT DO THIS I almost screamed that I missed them I don’t miss them I don’t want hanging boobs I want I said big and nothing wrong I don’t wanna forget my guy I don’t want big muscular guys they’ve never been my thing no I said her muscular I don’t want masculine because boobs are not masculine I don’t want boobs and I don’t want big muscular I keep calling them but they’re not hot I want with my guy it’s not just that I want to and I’m fine I have I haven’t lost my traction I know there’s lots of other guys but I don’t want them in the poop thing I hate this I feel like I can’t breathe like I’m hot and bubbly in my chest OK I hate that I keep saying I guess I I don’t want there to be a guess I don’t like boobs

Sexual Orientation OCD

2022Recovery

Date posted: 3y

I know this sounds like reassurance, but it’s just OCD sticking with a thought that you don’t like

Bookworm91

Date posted: 3y

I hope to God he right. I was coming here to see if you found it and because I had another thought I keep thinking makes me feel like but I don’t actually like boobs and I feel so embarrassed because I don’t like boobs and I can’t imagine what anyone thinks you’re a little on the dudes here . I’ve experienced some really shitty guys here like not like I’m seeking them out romantically it’s just some of the guys here are really shitty so it’s like that preys on my OCD as well like oh why bother with them if they’re at all crappy mean intellectually I know that’s not the case but you know emotionally. And I’m scared I keep saying it makes me feel like but I don’t actually like women’s anatomy no matter what there’s shape or size why do I keep feeling funny my testing makes me it doesn’t make me feel like I do I don’t know it doesn’t make me feel like it I don’t like boobs and I’m so embarrassed and I’m so sorry

2022Recovery

Date posted: 3y

There is no need to be embarrassed , you didn’t choose to have this , I know how much shame OCD puts into us but that’s normal , you’ll get through this

Bookworm91

Date posted: 3y

Thanks 🙏🏻

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