So I'm currently experiencing a lot of partner focused ROCD. I'm obsessing about my relationship being perfect and my partner being perfect. My brain is seeing his flaws as red flags and reasons to leave him. I see my ocd patterns here and but then I think what if im just blaming this on ocd and Im just ignoring these reasons to leave him. Has anyone else experienced anything similar?

Do you ever feel like you wonder if your ocd would be less if you were with someone else? Or would it be better if you were with someone else? I’m really upset because I used to be able to enjoy myself even with the anxiety and now it’s like i am just analyzing and I don’t have feelings and I’m irritated because there’s things that frustrate me about him that I don’t like and my brain says if I was with someone else I would be able to deal with those things better and that we just aren’t right for each other. And the thoughts that used to make me anxious about breaking up don’t like it’s really me that feels it. I know no relationship is perfect but it’s like my brain keeps saying with someone else I wouldn’t feel like this or I would but I’d be able to handle it better. It feels like I have to just start fresh with someone new cause the ocd got too into this to the point where I don’t feel or even know what’s real. It feels like fear and anxiety and just being so into this has just made me feel not into this anymore but idk if I’m thinking right. It’s also just warped the way I see him like I only see the negatives and my brain keeps saying you don’t feel this cause it’s wrong. And it’s depressing bc of how happy and safe I used to feel. I’m supposed to see him soon and it’s like I want to but also don’t because I feel like things have changed unless that’s just something I made in my head and cause I don’t feel the feelings I used to. But then I think I will just be this way with someone else but then my brain says otherwise and it’s so confusing. People keep telling me not to make decisions because I’m fogged but it feels like I’m not. Like my brain is manipulating me. And also like all the things I used to like I’ve somehow turned into like distaste which is so upsetting. I would like to think this is just ocd taking control and confusing me and distorting my perspective but I’m scared it’s not and that my feelings are gone. Has anyone experienced this but it was still ocd?

Lately my ROCD has been flaring up, making it difficult to even be around my partner. I’m having so many troubling thoughts with the one that bugs me most being, “maybe this isn’t my OCD, maybe I’m just in a bad relationship and I’m trying to cover it up and blame it on OCD”. This thought really scares me because there are valid doubts in my relationship but my boyfriend and I have openly talked about them and are trying to work through. My OCD won’t take that as an option tho. It makes me feel like I need to be 100% certain that these things can NEVER happen again or else we need to break up immediately. So anything he says in that moment about trying to do better, my OCD will not trust anything he says and just wait until the next “bad thing” happens. When I continuously bring these things up to my boyfriend even tho nothing has happened between these conversations, it exhausts him making it feel like he can never do enough. I feel so bad because I know it’s just my OCD getting in the way. But then that thought creeps in saying I can’t trust him because I need to protect myself. It’s just an ongoing cycle that is so tiring. I don’t even know what I want anymore. We are very opposite when it comes to emotions. I am very in tune and very emotionally intelligent, and he is not. He is the opposite. I do recognize that my anxious attachment style may be hard for him too but I can’t stop thinking about all of his flaws and all of the things he needs to do to make our relationship better. It makes me feel like I’m the only one putting in effort when in reality that is not true. But my OCD does make me feel like he doesn’t really love me or want to be with me and that he feels forced to be with me or do things for me. It makes me feel like him being with me is like a chore. Can anyone relate? My OCD just makes me feel like I can’t trust anything he says to make our relationship better.

Hi everyone, I’ve already been diagnosed with OCD, and I strongly suspect that I’ve developed a ROCD pattern. I wanted to share a specific situation that just won’t leave me alone – even though it’s objectively been cleared up. I’m in a relationship with a man who is, by nature, a very transparent, honest, and loyal person. Rationally, I know I can trust him. Recently, he got a phone call while I was with him. I asked him to check who it was. He hesitated briefly and then checked kind of slowly – the number wasn’t saved. To me, the whole thing just felt a bit strange. It didn’t seem like “open behavior,” even though he told me afterward that he simply didn’t have the energy to deal with it, since he had generally had a bad day. The problem is: Even after this explanation – which makes sense – the thoughts won’t go away. I keep replaying the situation in my head, analyzing his reaction, wondering if that hesitation meant something – even though I know he didn’t do anything wrong. I feel like I need to bring it up again to feel at ease. But I also know that would only bring temporary relief, and then the cycle would start all over again. It feels just like other OCD loops – only this time, it’s centered around my relationship. Have any of you experienced something like this? How do you stop yourself from falling into the reassurance trap over and over again? I don’t want to overwhelm or hurt my partner unnecessarily – I just want to learn how to manage this inner tension better. did it sound like ocd?? Rocd?? Thanks for reading. It really helps to know I’m not alone. (edited)