- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Hey! I’d love to chat.
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- 3y
Hello! Do you have any experience with HOCD?
- Date posted
- 3y
@cf05 I’m starting to believe it’s all just a lie and that I’m bisexual.
- Date posted
- 3y
@lennygirl I’m not sure what to do. I’ve tried ERP twice but I can never actually do it. I’m lost, and I feel like I’m the exception.
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- 3y
@lennygirl That’s what my worry has been, but I am trying to hang onto the fact that I would not feel so distressed and ashamed if that attraction was something I truly wanted
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- 3y
@lennygirl How have you tried it? I have not started yet but am supposed to be starting this week
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- 3y
I hate when people write something like this. It always feel like they're trying to bait me into private and take advantage of me
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- 3y
Look nobody is certain about their sexuality or whether they'll stay attracted to their partner irrespective of their gender or orientation. You gotta embrace that uncertainty in a world that pushes a lot of labels on us
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- 3y
My problem is that these thoughts came out of the blue and completely go against what I value. I know trying to disprove thoughts only makes them worse, but I am disgusted by the way they make me feel, so I cannot seem to figure out what else to do.
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- 3y
@cf05 You just got to accept that your identity is uncertain and unknownable
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- 3y
If you receive any kind of good advice please inform me because I’m still trying to figure that out after anywhere from 6 to 8 years of this shit
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- 3y
Boy do I. I’ve had it on and off since I was 12, and I’m now 20.
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- 3y
I’ve had SO OCD since I was 14 and it is hard. It starts to feel real after a while. False attraction, losing attraction, groinal responses, intrusive feelings. It can get intense, but it’s important to keep reminding yourself to accept the uncertainty of it all. It can definitely be scary to do so especially when you fear what may happen but you can’t worry about something until it happens and that’s only if it happens anyway.
- Date posted
- 3y
How do you carry on and interact with family members without feeling like you are faking not having thoughts? This is all new to me and the hardest part is not feeling like myself at all but trying to get back to that
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- 3y
Is yours on and off? And when it’s “off” is it still sort of there but it’s just not giving you anxiety
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- 3y
@cf05 At first it was hard interacting with others because I felt so weird about having the thoughts. Eventually I learned to let interaction serve as a bit of a distraction. I was able to say “I’m not gonna think about this right now I’m going to hang out with my friends” and it helped a lot with holding off on ruminating and limiting how much I was interacting with my thoughts.
- Date posted
- 3y
@lennygirl I’m not sure if you meant that comment for me but yes. It’s pretty much always on but in those past couple days where it wasn’t as bad the thoughts were still in the back of my mind but it was so easy to remind myself that they were not true
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- 3y
@lennygirl Mines is on and off. When it is “off” I feel mostly fine. I still notice the intrusive thoughts or feelings, but yeah I don’t get anxiety about it. I can just kind of move on with my life. Even if I do feel anxiety it’s not a lot.
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- 3y
@stop. Mine can be “off” for months at a time. I feel like that’s not very normal for OCD.
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- 3y
@stop. Also, are you a girl? And how old are you?
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- 3y
@lennygirl I am a girl and I’m 19. You can’t really worry about what’s “normal” we all experience OCD differently. I’ve been “off” for almost a year before.
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- 3y
@stop. You have other obsessions, though. This is my only one, and it started at TWELVE. that’s way too young!
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- 3y
@stop. I’m a girl and I’m 19 too. I have signed up for ERP therapy but have not started yet and am scared that it is going to bring to light the fact that my thoughts are true. , I have only had past relationships with guys and only want that in the future, but these thoughts make it hard to remember any of the rational parts of my past. Have you ever dealt with this and how did you overcome hesitation when seeking treatment?
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- 3y
@lennygirl And that is perfectly okay. Your OCD wants you to think that it means something but it doesn’t. Many people have one theme. Most people start to experience OCD sometime in their adolescence anyway. You can’t give this meaning and let it scare you.
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- 3y
@cf05 You really just have to accept the uncertainty that treatment might uncover something. It’s scary, but would you rather be free from your thoughts and possibly realize something or stay trapped and confused?
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- 3y
@stop. It terrifies me, because why does THIS have to be my one theme? It makes it seem like a sexuality crisis rather than OCD.
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- 3y
@lennygirl That’s my problem too. This is my only theme at the moment and is absolutely killing me because it seems so much more real than all the others. It’s making me afraid that I don’t know who I am and that I’ll never be happy again the way I was two months aho
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- 3y
@cf05 Can’t you see though? You’ve had other themes. That means it’s really, actually OCD. you’re also older, and yog e had boyfriends that you’ve loved in the past. do you even have signs from childhood that point to being gay ?
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- 3y
@lennygirl Pause. That is not true. You don’t have to have multiple themes for it to be OCD. OCD is OCD no matter how many themes. Age doesn’t matter either. You are invalidating yourself because your OCD is looking for reasons as to why it’s not. None of that matters.
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- 3y
Could you guys please read my most recent post?
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- 3y
Please, please look at my post and respond. I’m scared.
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- 3y
Post a link to it
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- 3y
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- 3y
Please, PLEASE look and respond.
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- 3y
You’re all ignoring me 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w
I’ve recovered from HOCD before and got my attraction and my usual actual identity back. I was recovered from end 2022- start 2025 until I got triggered UGHHH😭 My HOCD is REALLY trying to convince me and it’s SO annoying cause I genuinely don’t want these thoughts. I know I naturally like men and always have done so. I can’t wait for my first therapy session in two days Omg! I need your advice, not necessarily reassurance, but more advice? My HOCD is throwing random “proof” I did/ saw as a child in my face, which back then had no meaning in my life and I continued to live a perfectly heterosexual life. I’ve educated myself about arousal non concordance / child’s play, but it still doesn’t remove the HOCD. I’ve read therapists great explanations on how it’s not a sexuality issue, BUT ITS AN OCD BRAIN ISSUE. So basically I’ve been straight and i will die as straight. But my ocd is still continuing with the intrusive thoughts/flashbacks. I’ve had some moments where I haven’t done as many compulsions and had less anxiety but still had those damn thoughts and I DO NOT want those damn thoughts. I have so much proof and factual/logical explanations but HOCD is still continuing to thrive. I absolutely hate this and I feel so alone. I wish there was a reset button cause I don’t want these thoughts to happen. I want a man and I stand by that. How do y’all deal with these situations? Cause sitting with the thoughts is clearly not helping.
- Students with OCD
- Young adults with OCD
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- Sexual Orientation OCD
- Older adults with OCD
- Date posted
- 20w
having so-ocd has to be the hardest thing ever, and having different sub types pop out after is even harder. i want these thoughts to stop, when i think about ending up with a man i feel like it’s the end of the world, when a sexual or romantic thought about a man pops up i feel like throwing and my stomach hurts. i don’t want to be straight or end up with a man. i know my body knows what it wants and that’s why it’s making me anxious and stressed but i just want this ocd to stop, i miss who i was before this. are there any tips on how to battle SO-OCD and be back to who you were? i was in remission for almost a month and the thoughts that did come i didn’t care for, but it’s back harder this time.
- Date posted
- 16w
Hey everyone, I’m reaching out because I’ve been going through one of the hardest mental spirals of my life, and I’m hoping someone can relate or shed light on what’s happening to me. About 4 months ago, I accidentally came across a trans porn scene. It didn’t do much at the time, but later it triggered this overwhelming intrusive thought: “What if I’m gay?” Since then, it’s been absolute hell. I’ve always been into women—emotionally, sexually, everything. I’ve been in a long-term relationship with a girl I love deeply. But after that moment, my brain started spiraling into nonstop analysis. I began checking how I felt around men, whether I felt attraction, whether I was in denial, whether I was lying to myself. Literally everything became a test. I got stuck in this loop: • A thought pops in → panic • Try to solve it → brief relief • Another thought → worse panic • Repeat. At times, it got so bad I couldn’t feel anything at all—toward my girlfriend, toward women, toward myself. I started doubting everything. Some days, I feel emotionally flat, like I’ve lost my personality. Other days, I wake up with a full-body jolt of “truth” like “I’m definitely gay”—only for it to fade into numbness again. I’ve also noticed that I get short bursts of peace when I stop reacting, but then the fear comes back louder, like “See? Now you’re accepting it. That means it’s true.” Therapy hasn’t helped much so far—it felt more like general counseling. They told me to sit with the thoughts, but didn’t clarify if this was OCD, identity questioning, or trauma. That just made it worse because now I’m back to thinking “What if I’m just rejecting my truth?” I’m exhausted. I’ve lost connection to everything I used to love. • I want to love my girl again the way I used to • I want to feel desire without overthinking • I want to trust myself again I’m not looking for reassurance—I just want to know if anyone else has gone through something like this, and if this sounds like HOCD or identity OCD. Thanks for reading.
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