- Date posted
- 3y
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes this is ocd but the thing u have to understand is u might be lesbian. Maybe you are, Maybe you aren’t either way ruminating about it doesn’t change the outcome. Think about everytime u get in car, do you worry about crashing, probably not but it could happen. The important message is tht your ocd treatment isnt proving the thought isnt true its just taking the importance away from the thought.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
I agree with this but it can also be very triggering for someone who is in distress and not having a good day.
- Date posted
- 3y
I just really don’t want to be bisexual. I really, really don’t want to and I feel like it’s just a matter of time before I come to terms with it.
- Date posted
- 3y
Sometimes if your going really bad , it’s best to sleep , where your mind is at peace
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
I second this! Had a good day but was triggered by a show and sometimes when your mind starts getting stressed and tired, OCD can’t wait to charge. Choosing sleep now!! Also yes, read pure o by Chrissie. GREAT stuff
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
You are not alone. I started having these thoughts when I was young as well. Now I am happily engaged to a MAN. I’m a women. OCD still loves to show its teeth but it’s not what I want. The thoughts don’t make me happy. You should read PURE O by Chrissie Hodges - she talks about her struggle with this particular theme and I know it helped me so I think it’ll help you. ocd loves to also play the “you don’t have ocd” game. It has taken everything from my past and used it as “proof” it’s exhausting and debilitating. But you are not your ocd
- Date posted
- 3y
How young were you, if you don’t mind me asking?
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
@missbluesky Oh like 9 or 10 I think! I didn’t know I had ocd though. It took me going into the mental hospital at 23 for Harm thoughts and POCD thoughts to get a diagnosis. I had no idea what was happening. And now this theme has been with me for a couple years again. I’m 27. But I had these fears specifically when I was young and thoughtout growing up but didn’t know what it was.
- Date posted
- 3y
@OCD33 See what’s so bad about me is that I found out about what hocd was like 3 weeks after it started when I was 12, so I feel like I mimicked the symptoms so I wouldn’t have to be gay.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
@missbluesky That sounds like an OCD thought to me. It’s trying to take that as “proof”. So what if you realized it within 3 weeks. You were suffering and still are. It wouldn’t be this painful if it wasn’t OCD.
- Date posted
- 3y
You gotta just accept the thought don’t fear it just say “Thank you brain for that thought” and move on
- Date posted
- 3y
That’s the thing; I don’t understand how to do that. It feels like the thoughts are coming from ME, like they’re not intrusive.
- Date posted
- 3y
Everyone here understands. It might feel like you're alone but we all go through this. Sexual orientation OCD is literally a preconfigured theme in this app. Imagine if you had a theme that was even rarer?
- Date posted
- 3y
It’s definitely OCD I went through this for years and years ,
- Date posted
- 3y
I appreciate all the responses, thank you so much. It’s been a hard, hard day.
- Date posted
- 3y
Remember , It’s hard to fight thoughts when your mentally exhausted and OCD is like “She’s weak , let’s attack”
- Date posted
- 3y
I feel the same way
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w
I need too know that I'm not insane, really. I am 16 and for the past two weeks, this has been completely ruining my health and happiness. I only recently came out as a lesbian like 3 months ago after a lot of confusion about my attraction since I used to think I liked men. At first, I felt so sure that I liked women, but lately, I've been having these unwanted thoughts about the possibility of liking men. I never used to feel this way, but now, every time I look at a man, my brain obsessively fixates on it. It forces me to imagine kissing him, loving him, things I don’t want, and then tries to convince me that I do. It’s painful. The thought of this fills me with fear and anxiety, leading to panic attacks and breakdowns. I don’t want these thoughts. I hate them with every fiber of my being, but I’m terrified that one day I’ll act on them and somehow like it. I used to think I liked men, but back then, I was in a very unhealthy space in a time of escapism and something deeply parasocial. I’ve only ever liked the attention and validation a man could give me, but these experiences are somehow treated as further proof that I’m "bisexual." I’ve never been in a real relationship with anyone, which makes my brain constantly challenge me—telling me, “You don’t even know what love feels like.” It won’t shut up. It keeps obsessively trying to make me prove that I’m a lesbian, testing my reactions and questioning my certainty. Is this normal?
- Date posted
- 19w
As a lesbian with SO-OCD, I feel so helpless. It's truly exhausting because no one I know understands what I'm going through. The first response is always, "You're just confused" or "You don't have to know yet." But that's not the issue, I do know. I just never see any lesbians with SO-OCD so I feel so invalidated. These thoughts flood my brain constantly, forcing me to analyze my reactions to every man I see. I feel trapped in an endless cycle of "testing" myself, trying to prove that I don't like them. But my brain fights back, telling me I do want to love a man, making it feel real even though don't want it. It's terrifying. At this point, it's hard to even hold onto my identity as a lesbian because I'm so overwhelmed. I don't know if this is what real attraction is supposed to feel like, and that fear eats away at me. The truth is, when I think about being with a man, all I feel is disgust and fear-but my brain twists that into doubt. I hate it. I'm at the point where I'm scared I'm going to have to accept something I don't want because I don't know if this will ever go away. I miss who I was before all this.
- Date posted
- 17w
Im a straight man and sometimes I make the mistake of compulsively getting on here. It’s gotten better but I slip sometimes. I feel like I’m alone in this and I even read on some OCD page that Women are more likely to suffer from this theme than Men. That just makes me feel like I’m in denial of some sort. I feel alone and feel like my intrusive thoughts are different. I know that’s what everyone who has ocd thinks, but I can’t help shake the feeling like what if I’m lying to myself or what if I have some underlying secret. I don’t want to be gay. I find I argue with myself in my head over and over and sometimes by repeating “I don’t want to be gay, I want to be straight” I’ll end up saying the opposite and that would scare me even though I know that It happened because I’m constantly fighting with OCD. Just feeling a bit down today. I had a sexual dream about an ex girlfriend and it felt great and I’m not scared by it. I find and want to be with Women romantically til forever.
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