TW I wish I could talk to someone I don’t wanna wake up tomorrow I thought of Pete Davidson and I’m scared because I said she is I don’t I’m not I keep saying to myself but I’m not in the middle I’m not bisexual Kim Kardashians not hotter and I feel weird because I’ve seen her naked and I don’t like her boobs and I keep thinking of her naked and feeling funny like I don’t know what to feel her boobs are not sexy and I thought that Pete Davidson is weird because he keeps going for people who are so much older than him. And I’m not here to discuss whether it’s right or wrong you know grown adults will do what they do but I thought old me because his mom is and I thought of her big round boobs pushing up and off the chest cavity I don’t like big round boobs or not hot Kim Kardashian‘s not hot either his mom is not hot like oh maybe he has some weird mom issue and that’s where that thought came from. I don’t even give a damn about Pete Davidson i’m not I’m scared I must be because I said I meant to say Pete Davidson or Kim Kardashian then said she’s thinking of her boobs and smacking my lips but she’s not luscious I’m scared to sabotage she wouldn’t I don’t know how to feel I keep calling them big and hot and smacking my lips but they’re not delicious I said she wouldn’t go for me I wouldn’t go for her I don’t wanna go I said spoiled I don’t care I don’t I almost all my God I meant to say that I don’t care if she’s spoiled and I ended up saying repeatedly don’t care if she’s a girl I do care if she’s a girl I don’t like girls I care I don’t like girls I do care if she is I don’t like her I’m scared I keep remembering her naked and feeling funny why can’t I stop saying I don’t I do care if she’s a girls and she is I don’t want and I don’t know how I feel about that I keep calling them but they’re not sexy I don’t want her big round boobs why can’t I stop saying don’t I do care about I don’t care about her I do care about guys him not her not Davidson someone else I’m sorry. I keep saying I don’t care about her and then said not if she’s like I do care how can I say that I don’t I do care if she’s a girl and I’m scared I’m being mean about my guy like he is I don’t want to I said massively more than that more tractive I don’t wanna more muscular guy I don’t care about her I don’t care that I don’t care about her eye care that she’s a girl that’s why I don’t like her but now I keep amenity her shirtless and I’m afraid that you’re really weird like I’m not sure how I feel like she is so she’s not stupid I said I would I I wouldn’t go for her I keep imagining her naked and I genuinely don’t know how I feel I said I would I wouldn’t go I said she wouldn’t and I’ve know what women look like having sex I wouldn’t go by for anyone so why did I say I don’t care if she’s a girl and I said don’t I care and then I insisted I care if she is she’s not hot and I feel weird physically I don’t know how I feel I can’t stop and I feel weird like I know I don’t want those big round heavy boobs and now I act like but I I said I do I don’t care it’s not that I do I don’t care and I act like but I don’t like I’m scared I’m scared I don’t want those suckers in my mouth I don’t want this I can’t stop thinking of a shirt looks like she’s so but I don’t like it and now I’m scared I am I don’t want to start I keeps and can’t help it like I do I don’t wanna see it I’m scared to do I don’t I keep calling them and I must be an act like I don’t want them in mind I’m scared it I don’t want them in my mouth it’s not attractive I don’t want them in my head I don’t want boobs I don’t like girls I don’t wanna be here anymore I don’t care about her not if it’s a girl if it’s a girl I don’t care about her not if it’s a girl! I would not go bisexual for anyone let alone her

I won’t explain this again if you’ve been or going through it you know what I’m talking about. I felt good about women about an hour ago and now I’m worrying again I’m anxious and the groinals are back and it’s so annoying because I can’t study. And honestly I’m so sick and tired of this. I’ve been a girl crazy my whole life and my mind randomly decides “well what if you are gay” like bro. I’ve never seen a guy that way and in general IT WAS NEVER SOMETHING I THOUGHT ABOUT OR ASSOCIATED MYSELF WITH. IVE NEVER FELT ANYTHING TOWARDS A MAN AND NOW IT FEELS LIKE IT RANDOMLY FLIPPED. I CANT DO THIS BRO. WHY WOULD THIS HAPPEN IVE BEEN GOING THROUGH INSECURITIES ALREADY AND MY ATTRACTION WAS THE ONLY REAL THING I HAD LEFT AND NOW THIS. HOW MUCH DO YOU HATE ME GOD.

I’m like 90% sure I’m just bi, more romantically inclined to men, mainly my bf who I wanna marry. But now my brain is like “if you lean into liking women or keep circling and circling for answers you’ll lose all attraction to men and your bf. You’re practically already a lesbian” I feel so tense and anxious I will admit I am talking to chat gpt out of desperation I’m scared of losing all attraction to him I don’t wanna be thinking about women. I don’t unless I’m really stressed cuz when I’m stressed my ocd can take advantage of that I can usually ground myself when I’m in the city with him but I’m back home for most of the summer and I can’t be physically close to him which usually reminds me that hey this is real this is what I really want in life. Him But then I panic and question I haven’t been here in a while tbh. I’m worried I don’t feel enough. I don’t like magic Mike all that much, I like softer guys. But now the fact I don’t like/get turned on by random men on tv but do women in lingerie really stresses me out and makes me worry I’m truly a lesbian but I’m not. Once I started getting to know my bf and my ex bf’s I really did truly genuinely like them and wanted to make out and everything. Idk can anyone relate to the not liking big buff men All my brain is repeating rn is “when he dies you’ll be able to date a woman, when you break up you’ll only wanna date women” and it’s stressing me out. It’s making me nauseous. I was doing well for about a couple days after I initially left but being at home has been so incredibly draining This might give you a vision of how stressful home is: I’ve been on nexplanon for 7 months ish? Only had very minimal spotting during a stressful school period. Today: fully bleeding, like a usual period. I haven’t had my period since having it put in. I wanna go back to my bf so badly rn. I’m so worried I’m faking or don’t feel enough. I’m learning what a healthy relationship looks like and I’m terrified I’m gonna up and leave him when we’re older cuz I’ll finally figure out that I’m a lesbian or smthn. Idk. Someone pls just help me out a tad

hi guys i added to list. i’m freaking out i just need some help. signs of comphet (comphet is when lesbians who don’t know it and just follow norms and believe there straight) ive felt: “I never felt anything when kissing boys and totally thought that was normal… I talk to men, go on dates, but I think it’s to keep my life ‘interesting’ and have something to talk about with friends.” • lack of deep, natural emotional connection • • talking about my boyfriend to other people made me feel “cool”, “worthy”, “interesting” and felt like a way to prove myself • being able to clearly articulate all the reasons I liked a guy crush/my boyfriend (he’s smart, funny, kind, handsome, etc) whereas with a girl crush I can’t exactly put my finger on why I like them but I’m just naturally drawn to them • never missing my exes or feeling heartbroken about them (i would feel sad from being lonely and no longer having that daily routine of having someone to talk to, but didn’t necessarily miss that specific person) • i was always very hesitant about “becoming official” with a guy i would be seeing and would make him wait before deciding to date because i “didn’t know if i really liked him or not” only being aroused by their the man’s desire for me • Thinking I was cooler than other girls because I didn't spend any time thinking about how cute boys were or being "boy-crazy". I was under the impression for a while that I must just be less shallow than other people because I didn't really take looks into account when I had a crush on a boy, I only factored in their personality. chasing the ego boost more than emotional closeness agreed with friends or mom about someone being attractive even if you didn’t feel it—another big flag being bored, ditching serious commitment, chasing the drama again it also feels like i’m acting a lot of the time to make it more romantic cause i cringe When you fantasize about men, it is mostly just enacting a kind of narrative. More focused on movement than features- the men in your fantasies might be faceless or blank-featured or their bodies might symbolize some emotion. you might not even be in the in the fantasy, but instead another faceless woman might be. You might even imagine yourself as the man. The narrative follows the sexual script, but the details are more vague and abstract and might even shift and change throughout the fantasy. i dont care about like what guys looks like. like my sister saw a video of a guy working out and was like got damn omg gotta like that. if i saw that i would prob be like damn to try and prove something to myself but i don’t really understand what i should feel it feels like i relate to so much comphet after i read it on reddit and it doesn’t even make me want to cry and die anymore. it feels like i tolerate men or have done it for attention or because i thought it was going to happen at some point cause it was what was happening around me like sister and friends. i’m scared ill never find someone i want to marry that’s a man it feels like it’s all just comphet and i don’t want to actually be with a man the more my meds work and anxiety lessens the more the fear feels real because i can’t get myself anxious about it anymore. i can about other stuff but not this. i always told myself i don’t chase i attract. maybe thats cause i never wanted a big badly enough. maybe what im missing is a girl what if that ends up feeling more real Straight people don’t need to talk themselves into what’s hot. like during the hocd break i would try and like see what was “hot” and and be like yeah that’s hot. i also i refused to masturbate to women and not think about it because i didn’t want it to prove that i still liked it but i mean idk if that was left over hocd