- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I get nervous sometimes because I don't want to have bad thoughts about him. I hate it. It makes me so sad.
- Date posted
- 3y
relate to this. stay strong ❤️❤️
- Date posted
- 3y
i used to! i eventually got over it with exposures
- Date posted
- 3y
Was that with ERP? I try to let the thoughts pass through, but sometimes I am so overwhelmed they hang over me like a grey cloud... I don't even actively engage, they just don't stop swirling
- Date posted
- 3y
@AnonOCDsufferer At least for me letting thoughts pass isn't always enough (or I'm not good at it) I find actively doing exposures way better than trying to accept things
- Date posted
- 3y
@k-low Thank you for sharing. I'll give this a go
- Date posted
- 3y
It's so interesting to read these types of comments when I'm in a phase of low anxiety. I have had (still sometimes have) the same exact thoughts. But when someone else writes about it I find it so obvious and clear that it's OCD and what needs to be done, but when it comes to myself it's like "wait but it's probably not OCD right now, it's true" and then I freak out about that. Very weird. But you got this! Keep doing ERP I think it can be tough when we thing "oh I don't know if this feels like OCD" but honestly that questions itself is a compulsion. Bc in the rare occasions I actually feel an unpleasant emotions that's not driven by OCD i don't even think about questioning it, it just happens.
- Date posted
- 3y
I find that for myself to! It's always easier to see it in someone else! You are right, me posing that question could be a compulsion. That is the same for me, if its proportionate to how I logically feel, I don't question it.
- Date posted
- 3y
I experience similar. When I first did my 12 sessions I felt so good, my ROCD started to be background noise. But after some exterior stressors and triggers, it’s coming back and making me analyze every feeling I have around my fiancé and any intimate moment I’m not feeling like I think I should be. It’s awful and makes it so hard to look forward to time together. I just wish ocd wouldn’t attack the people and relationships we care about.
- Date posted
- 3y
I am so sorry you have till deal with that. I understand what you mean. It makes it hard to know what you are actually feeling because you constantly think about how you think you should feel and test it against how you actually feel, which I feel psyches me out and I end up feeling more negative, fulfilling the prophecy the thoughts set. I wish it would stay away from loved ones too!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 18w
Does anyone else struggle with object permanence in relationships? Like whenever my partner is out of the house I immediately think negatively or I find things wrong with the relationship or him… For background my partner and I always fight over chores (I know it’s common but it’s annoying) I definitely pull more weight than him and I think he has ADHD, which makes him struggle to help and be aware of helping. Lately we’ve been somewhat good with splitting meals and dishes whatever, I know it can change with work stress, fatigue whatever. But last week my partner was out of the house watching his uncle’s dog so he was barely home. He was sleeping over at his uncles house and would come home for meals sometimes and stuff like that. I started becoming super fixated on him not helping with the dishes before he left and would constantly feel urges to yell about it. Even though the week prior everything was good when it came to that (sometimes with my ROCD I’ll even question myself and be like was it?) so I have started 4 separate fights arguing about dishes and chores and mentioning that he doesn’t help enough and if this continues I’ll have to leave… it’s so hard for me to snap out of it and just realize that he was going back and forth and didn’t think to help because he was busy with helping his uncle. And then I get such a negative view of him in my head that I nitpick his appearance, I make comments, etc, because my underlying fear is he doesn’t care to help, he will never change, and we will fail. So it’s almost like I’m looking to have a reason to run before I actually need to? It’s a constant cycle for me and I’m truly so exhausted by myself. But also relationships are so hard for me because I struggled SO much with trying to depend on others that I almost don’t let myself depend on others…. Any advice is appreciated but also just like do you also experience this? Thank you & pls be kind 🥺🥺🥺
- Date posted
- 13w
Lately, I’ve been feeling extremely confused and guilty. My boyfriend has been really busy with exams, and we haven’t talked much this past week. I don’t really feel like I miss him, and that scares me. It makes me think maybe I don’t love him anymore, maybe I’ve changed, and maybe this relationship doesn’t feel right for me anymore. A few days ago, a friend invited me to go to a club with her and another girl. I know that if I went without my boyfriend, he would feel bad — not because he’s controlling, but because in our relationship, we’ve always had mutual boundaries and respect. I decided not to go, but ever since, I’ve been spiraling. My thoughts keep going: “What if I didn’t go just because of him?”, “What if I actually wanted to go, but I stopped myself because I don’t really love him?”, “What if I’m holding myself back and this relationship is limiting me?” All of this makes me think I’m bored, that I don’t like him anymore, or that I’m staying out of habit. It’s hard to tell what I really want or whether these thoughts are part of ROCD or some deeper truth. I keep wondering if I’m just attached to him because he’s my first boyfriend and we’ve been together for so long. Sometimes I even think I wouldn’t care if we broke up, and that I don’t feel anything for him anymore — and that absolutely destroys me, because he’s such a good person who truly loves me. He doesn’t deserve to be treated with so much doubt and coldness. I feel miserable. I don’t know what’s real and what’s just obsession. It hurts that I can’t feel any clarity or peace. I just want to know if this is ROCD or if I’m in denial and refusing to accept the truth
- Date posted
- 8w
Right now I feel like I’ve realized something awful. Like maybe… I never truly loved my boyfriend. Maybe in the beginning I was just excited to be in a relationship. Maybe I confused that excitement with real love. And when the intrusive thoughts started, maybe it wasn’t ROCD — maybe it was the truth hitting me. I write this and it feels real. That’s the scariest part. It feels calm and clear and like maybe I’ve just been lying to myself all along, holding on because I “should,” not because I truly want to. I can’t remember how it felt to love him — and that makes it worse. I feel so disconnected, so numb, like nothing makes sense anymore. Every time I try to feel something for him, it feels like I’m faking it. Like I’m playing a role, not being myself. But the thing is… I’m not at peace. If this was really the truth, why does it hurt so much? Why does this “realization” come with panic, guilt, emptiness, and so much fear? I don’t want to hurt him. I don’t want to lose him. But I also don’t want to keep living like this — doubting myself, my feelings, and my past. I feel like I’m stuck in a cycle I can’t break, and I’m scared I’ll always feel this way. Has anyone ever felt like this before?
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