- Date posted
- 6y ago
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Don’t worry! I’m a bi girl with OCD and let me tell you - attraction is funny! It works in strange ways. But I promise you that sudden loss of feeling attracted to guys was your OCD. Just breathe and remember as long as you WANT to be attracted to guys, and you know deep down you have been - then you are. The thing about labels is that you get to decide what label you want to use. If gay doesn’t feel right (which if it’s giving you anxiety, I promise it doesn’t) then you’re not gay! End of story :)
- Date posted
- 6y ago
You’re probably not fully accepting the fact that you could be a lesbian if you’re still afraid of it then. Acceptance of bi is a start.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
It’s such a complicated thing. Trust me when I say I understand. My advice would be to try and shift your attention to the positive aspect of this! Discovering you’re bi can be super fun. There’s a really beautiful community out there who will welcome you, and I’m so proud of and happy for you for realizing!
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Awwww. Thank you again! I don’t fear being bi at all which is great. I guess I do fear that calling myself bi is just the first step to gay because I’m in denial or something. But it’s nice to know that I’m accepted by such nice people like you!
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I think I have HOCD and this is all brand new to me even these thoughts, I’m confused as to why this happened and what’s going on. I question everything about myself now and second guess everything
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yeah, because that is called arousal non concordance, and don’t worry, women get it more with sexual stimuli they aren’t actually into, even more than men. I read that women get aroused in combination with what they actually are into only 10% of the time. But anything that’s sexual, even if it’s two women having sex and they don’t want that, they can still feel aroused.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
How do you know that you are bisexual?
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Of course! I know we don’t know each other at all but I’m very well versed in both the bi community and my OCD experience. If you ever need any help or have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask. Idk if there’s a way to dm on here, but we can figure it out and if you ever need support, I’ve got you. This must be a very complicated and confusing time because OCD makes literally everything complicated and confusing.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Hey. Have you been having thoughts about being the opposite sexuality?
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Yes and it’s really weird. I’ve never been attracted to males in any way, have never gotten erect from a man and have never fantasized about being with one
- Date posted
- 6y ago
KBright, that’s so great to know, and I’ll let you know if I ever need some help and once again, thank you! I still don’t complete know if I’m bi or not because the idea of not liking guys is scary as heck, but I don’t mind being able to love EVERYONE, ya know?
- Date posted
- 6y ago
AFord15 that sounds like HOCD, especially since it’s just come out of nowhere!
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Yea I’ve overnanalyzed everything and I’ve read so many denial and coming out stories and none have any consistencies to my background. I’ve never thought I was different from my friends and have always crushed on girls since I was small. I’ve never watched gay porn on anything. But for some reason I can’t rid myself of this thought that I’m gay or I’ve suddenly changed or been this way all my life.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
I fear that I’m conditioning my mind to be ok with it and I will eventually be gay or be attracted to men
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Emilia1234, thankyou! I’ve never actually been attracted to girls before so maybe I’m not bi haha. I think I find boobs attractive, but don’t really have sexual fantasies about girls. In the past I’ve only ever liked guys, but I guess I wanted to be bi so that I could accept HOCD. But now I’m scared I am bi because I don’t want to stop liking guys! Wow my brain is annoying.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Someone just flagged me for “reassurance seeking.” ONCE AGAIN. Done with this app, goodbye.
- Date posted
- 6y ago
Oh I hate that!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Kbright, hey I know it’s been a while but can I have some help?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I’ve never wanted to be in a relationship with a girl or even had a crush on a girl. But I find boobs attractive, and I think they might arouse me. Nothing else on a woman though. Does this make me bi?
- Date posted
- 5y ago
@Eden, I’ve read that, I think around 98% of women, experience sexual arousal towards other womens bodies at some point. So all women are basically a small percentage of bisexual, even if they identify as straight. It’s normal, and it’s how the female brain works. Men who identify as straight do not usually experience the same thing towards other men though. Look it up.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Or maybe don’t if you’re paranoid.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Thanks! It’s just weird because boobs themselves (with clothes on) don’t necessarily turn me on, but the naked body would. But nothing else on a woman. I’m glad it’s more normal than I thought though!
- Date posted
- 5y ago
I was probably mistaken with that study. What is actually more relevant that I found out after posting, is a term called “arousal non concordance.” You know the groinal syndrome with OCD? Those unwanted sensations in the groin are actually very common in general, even without OCD. Even things that are just sexual in nature without you liking it, can set off arousal. This is because your body and your mind are separate in this area.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yeah, I guess it just doesn’t really feel like the groinal syndrome with this. Of course it makes me anxious, but they aroused me even before my OCD was present.
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Yeah I guess. I’m not too anxious about it, as long as it means I’m not gay. I just don’t want to lose my attraction towards guys!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 14w ago
Idk what else to title this. I was watching a film cooper video cuz why not and he mentioned smthn about wall paper customization and icons and stuff and I just kinda had a groinal response followed by the memory of me having my first crush on a woman (my friend at the time) that helped me figure out that I’m bi and I felt kinda intensely for her but that’s cuz a) it was new and b) we were kinda on again off again friends who haven’t spoken in a few years now and I’m over her entirely. It was toxic I think. She was too much like the person who bullied me in elementary school (they were friends as well so my mom made me cut her off which is. Fair. Made me really sad but eh that’s life) I saw her at prom cuz someone brought her. It was nice to see her but yeah that was it. And now I’m mentally comparing what I felt for women in the past (idk intense crush, listening to a lot of gay songs (think she by dodie) dressing semi masc cuz funky, we had nicknames for each other despite not dating or anything) to men (less intense crush but still big crush, I’ve only dated and kissed men so sparks rhere) and now I’m just slightly nauseous and worried that I don’t like men as much as I like women but I think that’s normal for any bi person? To have different levels of attraction to different genders? Idk I feel gross and icky now like I shouldn’t even be thinking about it or her cuz I have a bf. And I do look fondly upon it, now I’m nervous cuz I got more excited about her calling me a specific nickname than I do from my bf calling me honey even at the beginning? Honey felt more traditional and I love it but we do switch around nicknames and it’s always nice, not many butterflies anymore, and sometimes I get anxious when he does lately, if it’s a nickname in Portuguese. Or if he called me a shortened version of my name. What does that mean? I’m nervous now. I was doing half decently today now I’m nauseous again. I’m worried that cuz I liked the nicknames she and I had that means I don’t like the ones my bf and I have and that I just don’t like him or men cuz I’ve been feeling off around him. But I love when he calls me honey, it still feels good when he does it now but no butterflies. Idk what’s wrong with me. Is it even ocd at this point. Even if I do like women slightly more it doesn’t erase that I love my bf. I’m worried I’m leaning too much towards women tho and I’m a lesbian. Idk if my bi cycle is cycling or if I’m just a lesbian entirely cuz I don’t feel much when my bf takes off his shirt, sex feels different, and things feel stale and slow. But maybe that’s cuz I’m checking and comparing. Now I’m anxious fuck. I’m trying not to think about her idk why. I’m worried I still find her attractive or am attracted to her or smthn. She’s in my city. I didn’t care before but now I do. Or if I think about her I’ll think about other women and will only want to have sec with women which not really tbh. I wanna be able to enjoy sec with my bf. It just hasn’t felt right lately cuz I’ve been so depressed and obsessive. I wasn’t obsessing much last night when we had sex but it still didn’t feel passionate. It didn’t feel uncomfortable but I thought it’d be more? Idk. I know it’s normal to not feel him inside me cuz the vagina isn’t very nerved up compared to the clitoris but it felt like more the motions. But tbh. I needed it. Idk I wanted to have sex and it was a nice stress relief. I just didn’t feel butterflies which kinda bummed me out but we’ve been having sex since august so that’s normal. Idk. I haven’t been able to fantasize about sex. The fact that I’m bi makes all of this so confusing. Cuz yes hypothetically I can enjoy the thought of sex with a woman. But I don’t want to rn cuz I’m dating a man. And I can’t fantasize about sex with him cuz I’m getting intrusive thoughts about my friends and I having sex. I have this urge to watch porn cuz it’s been a while but I’m not going to. I’ve cut down a lot on masturbation. Partially cuz this partially cuz I wanna do things with my bf (when I’m mentally ok) but jow my brain is saying “Oo you think all these women are so hot you’re gonna go feral blah blah blah” and yes women are hot but I don’t wanna have sex with a woman. Idk saying women are hot doesn’t bring me anxiety but the thought of sex with one or leaving my bf and saying I’m a lesbian bother me. Cuz I know it’s not true. I love him I know that. I’d be happy if we stayed together. I wouldn’t regret a thing honestly. I like having sex with him. Idc if it’s not like porn or the movies. As long as I’m being pleasured and he’s being pleasured we’re good. That’s what sex is about. I think the loss of butterflies is normal cuz the excitement of like (sorry tmi) fingering and oral eventually wears off right? But still feels good. I don’t feel as excited about intimacy anymore cuz we have done it so often but it still feels nice. But my brain perceives that as me not liking sex with men and therefore I’m gay. No I just don’t feel the need to jump his bones every single time I see him?? Idk the friend thing is bothering me. Idk if I feel any joy behind it. The groinal response really really throws my perception off
- Students with OCD
- Sexual Orientation OCD
- OCD newbies
- LGBTQ+ with OCD
- Relationship OCD
- Young adults with OCD
- Date posted
- 11w ago
I’m 25 and never ever thought this before my soocd relapse. I have a bf of 5 years. Never been a high libido kinda girl. Don’t get me wrong I do get turned on by my bf but not like every day you know? - That had always been in the back of my head, is this normal and ok? But my ocd has latched onto the most scariest what if EVER. My brain is now saying How do you know you won’t prefer to sleep and kiss girls if you haven’t tried it: and it’s that unknown that is scaring the shit out of me. I DONT AND NEVER HAVE wanted to sleep / kiss a girl. But now my intrusive thoughts is all I think about!!! I don’t want I don’t want I don’t want??? So why does my brain think BUT WHAT IF??? I know ocd thrives off uncertainty which is why I think this is happening? But I don’t wanna find out or work it out because all I want is to be with my bf and marry him!! Is this just the epitome of OCD?
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- "Pure" OCD
- OCD newbies
- Students with OCD
- Relationship OCD
- Sexual Orientation OCD
- Young adults with OCD
- Date posted
- 10w ago
Sorry long post. Anyone feel like now they’re just in extreme denial. Like when I was little I noticed guys more than girls in movies and was more drawn to them. I remember changing my mindset to switch that. 98%of my life has been straight until recently. I felt drawn to some guys but never thought of it sexually. Always had girl crushes dreams and porn. Now I watch porn and I feel like straight takes longer and then I go and watch gay porn and feel nothing until I tell myself it’s two attractive dudes and love is love and imagine physical sensations and then it hits like suddenly. Like I have to convince myself it’s alright. Then when I try again I can do all that but feel nothing and then straight porn works. Idk if it’s just getting a fix or the first time works with anything or what but it’s confusing. On top of that I’ve felt girl relationships including my wife maybe miss something and a guy maybe matches that feeling that but then I feel like I’d be missing something without a girl or my wife. Idk I’ve had some rough times in life with male figures in my life but idk. I feel like I have to convince myself more and more that I’m straight even more than the first time I dealt with this. Can someone relate? Please
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