- Username
- LydiaK
- Date posted
- 2y ago
I had a great childhood, with no real trauma (other than my mom getting cancer, but she lived for nearly 25 years after that). Looking back, I had OCD my whole life...but it was so mild it was almost unnoticable. Then here I am, 38 years old...and it comes at me full force. I've been a mess ever since.
It could be the environment you're at now, perhaps your job causes you stress or something like that. I heard it shows its sharp claws when you're under serious stress or even boredom.
I had a good childhood. And I had OCD my whole life I think?? Compulsions mostly. It was mild. Now I'm 17 and I have intrusive thoughts mostly đ
Same, it's used to be more externalized but now it's pure o
I had a good childhood for the most part, my dad was verbally abusive to me though which I think started my anxiety. Iâve always been so anxious and scared of everything because of my father. Iâd say I definitely had OCD since I was a young girl but I just wasnât really aware of it then. It has become worse over the years and now I really understand why Iâve always felt the way I did as a young kid. đ
Mine was intense when i was ,10 but i managed to get over it surprisingly easily, it's now that i find it really hard with this new "theme" i deal with. It shreds my self esteem to pieces.
My childhood wasnât good at all due to abuse but my grandparents and parents tried their best to make up for it. Sometimes making it worse with trying to spoil me and then realizing they were spoiling me, so walking stuff back and becoming strict randomly. But it what it is and I love where I am in my life now, so itâs no biggie. And whenever something pops up, I have a great therapist to help me through it đ
Glad you're living the life you want now â¤ď¸
Still going through my childhood. I've been fighting with my parents for as long as I can remember, same with my siblings. My older brother wants to move out ASAP and cut all contact off with them. But other than parental issues, I never really had any real trauma. Always succeeded in school, and always had a good friend group with me.
How has everyone else's OCD progressed throughout their lives? Has everyone else always had severe OCD or did you live regular lives beforehand and encounter one point where it went from 0 to 100. Where are you now in your OCD Journey? I'm very curious as to everyone else's stories and have left mine below if youâd like to read it. From what I can remember, I went relatively undisturbed by OCD  the majority of my middle/late childhood, only having about 1-3 thoughts a year that weren't super bothersome but did create a level of distress uncomparable to regular intrusive thoughts. They were mainly about my health and about my parents safety & wellbeing. The earliest memory about my OCD that really stood out was back in 5th Grade, when I hit my head on a swing set and immediately began reciting every moment leading up to injury as well as every math equation I knew to make sure my memory was still intact. The greater part of my adolescence was essentially the same and resembled what I believed to be a normal life,  just with a couple of OCD thoughts sprinkled throughout it. I was able to function pretty well albeit depressed and somewhat anxious. It wasn't until I was close to my highschool graduation that I experienced the worst panic attack(at the time) at the idea that I would hurt my parents. It was so distressing because the thought felt so loud that I believed it was genuine which only caused more distress. I was so scared that I would act on the thought that I discarded all of my sharp objects and locked myself in my room. That was my first ever severe reaction I experienced due to OCD and was back in May of this year. I actually learned what OCD was the same night and realized that many of my newly found fears including mold growing in my walls  and my parents disliking me were also caused by the OCD. Unfortunately learning that it was probably OCD wasn't enough to quell my fear and I engaged in a bunch of compulsions in the months to come, worsening my OCD In the process. June was alright. July was worse(I only had like three topics for obsessions which sounds great now). Late July-Early August was my tipping point . Things went from worse to profoundly terrible in a short period. I found this app late August which was great because I had grown exhausted. September was pretty bad but not as bad as August. Now it's October and life is somewhat good now. I've become more knowledgeable of OCD (big thanks to this app and my therapist) but I'm very far from done. There's still this looming sense of anxiety that follows me everywhere. I have like 20 obsessions now, some being larger and scarier than others but those smaller ones are still apparent. But, the fear has decreased as well as the mental compulsions that came with it. My mind is quieter now. However the anxiety has stayed the same. My heart still drops whenever my worst obsession is triggered. Headaches, brain fog, sweating, rapid heart rate, sense of being paralyzed, racing mind are commonplace in my life but I've learned to sit with  the physical discomfort (not that it makes it any less terrifying). Anyways, I'm here now which is cool. Iâd like to listen to others' experiences to get a better understanding of OCD and maybe feel a bit less alone. feel free to ask any questions.
Hi everyone. I have PANS OCD and had it early as a child around 5. It was debilitating I went though counting, contamination OCD even thinking family members were contaminated, hand washing till my hands were raw and more I had a good childhood but it was heavily OCD based which stinks. I am now 25 and have had manageable OCD throughout the last 10 ish years. Up till late last year I got it back again worse than ever.. I am now worried about asbestos and mold and lead and household things we moved into an older home and itâs been awful. I also worry constantly 24/7 about death⌠also We donât have any of those materials In our home but my OCD wonât leave me alone. I went into treatment didnât sleep the 4 days I was there and checked myself out, I instantly regretted it and tried going back but they wouldnât let me back right away unfortunately. I am seeing my therapist once a week and trying to live life as an adult with OCD it never fully went away but it was so manageable and now I need to learn to live with crippling OCD all over again if anyone has any advice or relates to this please comment so we can talk. Thanks Lydia
I want to heart about your OCD story. Please use this comment section as a safe space where we can all share our struggles, and find those who relate to us. Iâll go first. When I was 13 years old, I went through one of the toughest years of my life. It was awful. My anxiety was on full and my depression followed wherever I went. I started to do compulsions then. Checking, double checking, triple checking. Whether it was an email, an essay I wrote, the lock, the hair straighter etc etc etc. I used to seek reassurance from someone, who is to this day my best friend. I was so embarrassed when I would do it, but I felt like I had to. I would cry myself to sleep. I didnât know I had OCD. When I was 16 and learning about mental illnesses in class, I remember listening to a group presentation on OCD. From there, I knew what was wrong with me. My OCD died down when I was 14, yet I vividly remembered the struggle. At 18 years old, right after graduating high school (just recently), my OCD came back at full force. It seems like it accompanies my anxiety when it reaches a level beyond the scale. Every morning I wake up, and Iâm scared to go about my day. Whether Iâm reading, driving, painting, talking or anything, Iâm constantly scared of what my OCD will do. Iâm scared of my own brain. I hope we can all someday think of OCD as just a memory. Thank you. â¤ď¸
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