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the NOCD Community

The whole crux of this telling me that I’m a lesbian is because I think women are pretty. I know there is a lot more involved with actually being a lesbian than that. Now the thought what if you’re just bi came into my head. It’s causing some anxiety but at the same time I don’t actually like women. Like I like women as friends, but that’s it. I’ve never liked one as anything more than as a friend. But because of loss of attraction and false attraction I find like every woman beautiful and my thoughts are like, see I told you so. Yes, my anxiety is down. Yes, I know these are just thoughts. But sometimes I still get freaked out. Like even putting all this int existence on here I can see how silly this all sounds and how OCD this all sounds. Does anyone else identify with this in anyway? I just want to know I’m not alone.

My biggest is ruminating, i talk and talk and over share with myself and others Like what are some exposures?

I'm 15 turning 16 soon and I'm 100 percent convinced I have ocd.. I have been having major symptoms since I was 13, the constant what ifs, rumination, compulsions, guilt, anxiety from intrusive thoughts. I tried to open up about it to my parents when i was 13 but they dismissed it cause they don't believe in mental health.. I really want to get better. My parents won't listen to me and I don't wanna tell a teacher at school cause that would make things worse as they would just tell my parents and obviously since I'm 15 I can't afford therapy.. I don't know what to do :(

Have you ever been through Very bad thoughts about your brain wants to twist anything about good or bad like evil and good which is god and sat*n and panicking because you believe In god but your brain is messing with you have you ever felt like you're afraid you had commit blasmphy in your thoughts It's very bad thoughts like omg where does these toughts come from?? Please tell me your experience One moment I feel okay and I can pray and vent to god and other moment I'm so ashamed of myself for thinking like that Am I alone in this am I crazy?

Another way to describe it is a loss of ability to let uncomfortable thoughts flow through our minds. It's like a fire alarm going off in our heads and an urgency to work out what these thoughts mean and what we can do about them and it's the exact reason why going to talk therapy is the worst thing that someone with OCD can do.

I believe this to be true. I could check my door a hundred times a day, it didn't help. I would want to check even more because I never trusted my checks....i didn't realise my repeated checking was playing into this. I thought it was helping funnily enough it was doing the opposite and making me doubt even more.

I’m thinking about doing erp but my ocd is so severe the thought of accepting my fears happening to me makes me sick to my stomach. I also believe in the power of my words and saying I accept this Bad thing will attract it into my life. I’m not sure what I should do🥲

I have disturbing thoughts. I am very upset. Someone please help me. Please talk to me.

My son has Pure O religious/scrupulosity with GAD and Bipolar. My son was diagnosed with Pure O religious OCD two years ago. He has to complete a task so that God doesn’t send him to hell if he doesn’t do it. These tasks are dangerous like doing multiple back flips on concrete, or jumping off balconies three times, doing MMA slams on his back three times. The thoughts are telling him if he doesn’t do this he will go to hell. Or he is so worried about blaspheming the holy spirt and loose his salvation. He knows this is his OCD. He knows the scripture and that God is one of peace and love. Been there and done that on quoting scripture and reminding him he is saved. I can see the torture he is going through and it is painful to watch. He also needs to be stuck next to me at all times cuz it makes him feel safe. This is impeding on my life as I feel I have a toddler again, he is 24 and a former 4 star football player. He wants this to stop, he is in therapy and working on it. He was free from these thoughts from November 2023 till April 2025. He is dealing with narcissistic trauma with his father and this triggers the OCD. My question is what can I do to support and help him through these episodes and not agitate him and to help him heal?

I’m trying to let them pass not engage nothing , trying to compusle but the thoughts won’t leave. My brain keeps telling me I should stab my dad for not asking if I’m okay after the death of my ex …

Im still searching about pure o ocd while I still look for a specialized therapist so that's why I'm asking the following thing lol Is normal to have months and/or years without an ocd episode? I noticed I had a considerable amount of episodes in all my living years but sometimes they took a year or a bit more than a year to appear, in worse scenarios I noticed the took just months to appear once again Is that normal? Im kinda feeling guilty about it because I notice some people live 24/7 with ocd since they are kids while my thing is more like, episodically, not 24/7 since I was born? My last episode started in August of last year and is still haunting me but I know people had it worsened since their earlier years of life

I have experienced every theme that can be added to post but I’m currently experiencing those. So I am on the spectrum and I happen to have a high sensory profile and it definitely gives the ocd more to latch unto. I would see a pretty female with makeup done and it eatssss and I would notice the facial symmetry + how her features compliment each other and my ocd would be like why did you notice she is pretty, BECAUSE I HAVE EYES😭! I can’t be the only neurodivergent person that notices details and how attractive people are intensely? I do not even care about orientation but I know for sure if I was into women, it won’t just start plaguing me one evening Im my head shouting “you are gay” like man Im a female at least say you are a lesbian 😭😂😂😂😂. How can I genuinely have no interest and get outrightly repulsed by females sexually and romantically. It feels like I am being forced to be something im not. I tried accepting i am lesbian but I experienced more anxiety and could not sleep till I accepted i am still straight and it is ocd playing with me(ocd leave me alone, I don’t even enjoy playing with you) I accepted i am a lesbian like ocd said I should but why do I still love my ex and hope I marry him😭 + I couldn’t bring myself to be interested in females. OCD leave me alone because I don’t enjoy this game again! I’m not homophobic at all but denouncing Im straight doesn’t feel like home and I still find myself yearning for only men

I feel like all I do is ruminate. 😞 I can’t imagine what it would be like to NOT do that.

I always feel the most anxiety and dread in the morning. That’s when I start overthinking a lot, and it becomes really hard not to seek reassurance on the internet and so on. What do you all do to ease the morning anxiety a bit?

I know that sounds a bit harsh, but people with OCD think very differently then everyone else and we do strange things. I used to think OCD was just that we overthink to much and have compulsions to fix it, but its kinda alot more than that i realise. Like peoples lives are legit debilitated from this thing. Thats serious and i dont think others realise that. Mabye im concerned too much idk.

My boyfriend is telling me every time im anxious, that if i didnt like him (i always think that i dont love him) i wouldnt suffer this much over my thoughts, and i could have just leave him. Its very true but i dont feel better at all and im thinking that i dont want to hurt hum or that im used to him and dont want to accept the reality and thats why i suffer because i am a good person???? im so sad and scared and anxious.

I am so tired, guilty, and scared of my thoughts. They are very dark and evil, and I can’t stand thinking about them anymore. It’s always the same dark thoughts every day, wishing death and bad things on my loved ones and even other people. I keep thinking about it daily, and it causes me so much stress. I love my family, and I don’t want them to die. I would be willing to sacrifice my life just for them to live. I always tell myself that I should be the one to die first, not my parents, because I’m a horrible person. I don’t know what would happen to me if they were gone. I badly want to stop having these dark and evil thoughts, but I can’t ignore them. Sometimes I try arguing with them, but it’s still hard to stop. How can I stop them? They’re so repetitive, and it feels like I’m going crazy while thinking about them. I feel like God won’t forgive me for having these kinds of thoughts. I can’t forgive myself, and I really hate myself. I hate myself so much because why would I think about such evil things? Why did it have to get to the point where I’m wishing death and horrible things on the people I love? I feel disgusting, and I don’t think I can love myself anymore because of these thoughts. My brain keeps telling me that I like the thoughts, that I really mean them. But what if I really do mean them? What if I actually want it? What if I think these things on purpose? I can’t do this anymore. I just want to die if I have to spend the rest of my life with these dark, evil thoughts especially toward my loved ones. I’m not suicidal, but I think dying is the only way to stop having these thoughts. I can’t look at myself the same way again. I don’t think I deserve anything good in life.

Does anyone ever feel like you know you have OCD, but at the same time you think it might actually be you connecting to a higher consciousness or vibration that is trying to control your decisions so that the outcome does not turn out bad kind of like the butterfly effect. It drives me crazy because I know I’m conscious that it’s OCD but at the same time I overthink and feel like it might be a higher power trying to warn me that I’m not doing something right, like example; if I flip the trash can lid a couple more times it’s going to pervert something bad from happening and that why I’m sensing I’m not doing it right, because if I spent a little more time there and if I would have left earlier the outcome would’ve been different. Or say I just fight through it and choose to ignore it, but then I’ll carry that negativity/worry of not feeling like I did it right and will project it out into existence because the thought won’t leave my head and in a way your seeking it out into existence since you keep thinking about it, kind of like an affirmation?

My brain keeps telling me to cover my dogs nose and suffocate him.:. I’ve covered his nose before for 10 seconds and idk why I kept doing it like am I trying to kill him is it a compulsion UGH I CANT LIVE LIKE THIS , I’m trying not to post on here but it’s nice to know others input if I’m a psycho or not …. Reassurance is sometimes needed idc what anyone says .

i’m in college and on my summer break now. i don’t have a job yet or much to occupy myself with and im finding it really difficult to keep my ocd under control. if i have nothing to do, i find myself sitting around and ruminating heavily and getting severely anxious and my thoughts just keep wandering. i don’t really feel peace of mind unless im with my boyfriend or my best friend, both of which i don’t get to see often because they’re very busy or live far away. im not sure how to keep myself busy and how to occupy my brain with something other than worries :(