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Hello, I’m a mother. My son is 17 and he has contamination OCD. We have been trying different ways to support him but he refused to see any therapist. He is struggling with paranoia and intrusive thoughts. Those thoughts make him so angry that he get yelly, throwing and breaking some furniture, and just yesterday he put a hole in the wall. He admitted that these didn’t help him feel any better, in fact it made him feel worse (because he didn’t want to act as such). We are doing our best to support him, talking with him but he refused to talk about those intrusive thoughts and paranoia. What do you suggest me to do? What would be helpful for me to do so he can talk with me more? We desperately want him to get help but he wouldn’t. Thank you in advance!

So I’m severely emetophobic but these past few weeks have gotten SO bad. I had a bad reaction to an SSRI that made me feel like I was gonna throwup, I stopped taking them over two weeks ago but ever since then the fear has got even worse. I haven’t left the house properly in weeks because I’ve convinced myself I’ll be sick. I feel nauseous even indoors a lot of the time (there are hours when I don’t, like for example this afternoon I was fine). But I challenged myself to go for a short walk this evening and omg it was so hard I really thought I might throwup. The thing is I KNOW it’s anxiety and not real nausea because it feels completely different to when I was actually nauseous from the medication. This feeling is more like a tight throat/sensation of a lump in my throat that makes me feel like I’m gonna gag. I also have RCPD (I can’t burp basically lol) so I just feel like I have trapped air in my throat that’s gonna make me puke. The phobia has gotten really really bad. I have started therapy recently but I’ve been scared of throwing up since I was a kid and I’m now 31 lol wtf. I remember last Christmas my mum said someone at her work had been sick and I was so scared my mum had caught it and would pass it on to me that I refused to leave my bedroom without wearing gloves and a mask and wiping everything with anti-germ wipes. But right now it’s so so bad because I have literally gotten to the point where I’ve convinced myself I feel nauseous pretty much 24/7 and I am taking anti-nausea meds almost every day. Has anyone else dealt with/has tips for this??? I’m literally desperate 😭

I came home from a trip today to find mold growing out of every vent in my apartment. This has been an intrusive thought of mine for a long time (i.e. everything is infected, spores in my possessions, spores in the air) and I feel like this has just confirmed everything I thought to be true. I’ve been reading statistics about mold to try to calm down (how common it is to have an issue with mold in vents and how low the chances are of illness from it) but I don’t know how to stop thinking about it being everywhere. Any advice?

This is about OCD but also I just want to rant, I feel very lonely at times. My dad died when I was very young & as the oldest daughter I feel like I’ve had to be strong my entire life. My friends & family love and support me but for some reason I’ve never felt comfortable being vulnerable or discussing my feelings. Everyone tells me I’m the person they go to for advice/support but I have never once opened up to anyone, it almost feels impossible to do so. I mask so well that none of my friends or family know I struggle. No one has ever seen me cry. Also, as a college student with a small group of friends who go out of state, I don’t have many friends in my area so that contributes to feeling isolated. I’ve been diagnosed with OCD, anxiety, & ADHD. As long as I can remember I’ve felt like a bad person and undeserving of love unless i prove myself by being good or useful. I try to keep myself working, volunteering & double majoring in school to feel worthy of love. I genuinely do love life & am so thankful because I feel very blessed. I have good friends & family. But I also feel isolated. (Ik I isolate myself but at the same time I don’t know how to stop). Anyways back in December I broke up with my bf who I had dated for yearsss. He really violated my trust & cheated on me after making me feel crazy for so long & swearing he would never betray me again. It hurt deeply. But ofc I handled it the only way I know how. By being strong. I self isolated. I didn’t tell any of my friends for weeks that we broke up and when I did, I didn’t tell them why (to preserve his image). No one saw how badly it hurt me. To everyone else I seemed fine. I started coping with it in embarrassing ways. I had casual sex with multiple people very quickly that clearly only wanted that from me & didn’t care about me as a person. I am ashamed of this. I’ve stopped meeting new people and decided that’s not the way I want to be and I want to put my energy into healthy outlets. But sometimes in moments of weakness I have had relations with past people (wanting to feel loved & desired & wanted). Anyways my recent theme of OCD has been health + morality related, specifically the fear that I have an STD. I started having some bodily sensations (that i’ve had in the past & aren’t STD related) and started worrying that I may have an STD. When I get health anxiety, I sometimes avoid doctors. I did that for about a month but finally scheduled an appt for Monday. But now the guilt is eating at me and saying “what if you had an STD this whole time & knowingly gave it to others bc you avoided doctors?” That causes me a lot of guilt & shame. I know this is OCD so I’m trying not to ask for reassurance. Sorry that was so long, this is the first time I’ve ranted in a very long time. I just want someone to see me.

I understand the concept of ERP and it makes sense for other subtypes, but I just don’t get how it can work for contamination OCD. I’m very early in my therapy journey, so I only really have the info I’ve gotten from online research, but from what I’ve seen, there are things like “don’t do your compulsions!” And it’s like…but my compulsion is washing my hands? And people should wash their hands! And I saw a few “challenges” online that recommended touching things in a public restroom and then touching your face??? And touching a public door handle and then eating without washing your hands between??? Those are things my non-OCD friends and family wouldn’t even do, so I don’t understand how that could possibly help me. Ugh. Maybe I’m just ranting because I’m scared of ERP in general, but I really don’t get it. Ok byeeeeee!

discovered mold in my a/c right before bed last night. we've had weeks straight of constant high temps and high humidity. the relative humidity in my room never really going below 60%. well, as such, mold started growing in my portable air conditioner. its probably been there for awhile and I never noticed. well, I'm absolutely freaking out. mold spores are now likely on every square inch of my room. not to mention the hassle and nastiness of having to clean the a/c itself. I was never worried about mold before but now it is a huge concern for me. where else is it that I just don't see? how will I know if its gone? what if its elsewhere in the apartment? how much of it have I ingested in all this time? it feels like theres just too much to worry about to bare. need a dehumidifier now so my a/c doesn't get moldy, which is just another reservoir and filter that needs to be cleaned or else IT will get moldy. on top of the maintenance for the a/c. on top of literally everything else. like is this really what life is? go to work so I can afford to clean the only apparatuses that keep my sleeping quarters safe? how am I supposed to conquer ocd when literally every facet of existence ties to it? I need clean water. good food. exercise. sunlight. all my vitamins and minerals. sleep well and regularly. and now i have to add on keeping an eye out for mold? on both food and just basic appliances? I'm fucking tired of it. its just one thing after another in life and I've had my fill.

So today I’m getting my car back from my grandparents bc it had no ac and they fixed it for me the day I gave them the car I was having ocd bc I touched a little tree air freshener no the air freshener itself but the outside of the wrapper and then I touched my steering wheel and I didn’t clean it before I gave it to them and I was having really bad ocd that day about it and now it’s coming back because I’m getting my car back today and I have a cat so I’m just always overthinking bc of her with the things that have chemicals on it common sense makes me feel stupid for feeling this when but I genuinely get overheated having to pick up this car today because I don’t wanna deal with it and it’s hair wash day and laundry day and I feel I should clean my steering wheel and ik I’m gonna have to wash my hands a million times and everything I touched after touching the steering wheel like my phone and the car handles and my front door handles. Should I just try and not do these things bc it’s common sense that doing all the this is necessary but I feel I need to I know I’m just needing reassurance I know I need to do nothing but I always stress about my cat and I go to the laundry mat to do my laundry so I don’t wanna be sitting there overthinking about my steering wheel bc I could of just simply wiped it down but I don’t wanna repeat the cycle of giving in to my ocd

Hi guys I know I keep posting but I having real bad anxiety rn. My bathroom sink was plugged and my dad came and fixed it but he put the drain stopper on the top of my bathroom counter which got me frustrated. Mind you it was dirty water with like black particles on my COUNTER!!! I tried to keep my composure and told my dad that I appreciate him doing this and I know he has a way of doing things , but told him to not do that. He kinda got annoyed but I told him it really bothered me. He finally unclogged the drain and everything’s fine now. During him fixing it, I was there watching him closely n I watched as he put the drain stopper on top of my counter it got on the side of my gel that I use for my hair. Now I’m having false memory that the water splashed on my skin care products. Like what if the bacteria got inside my cleanser? I don’t even wanna wash my face. I thought about cloroxing each item but it seems like no matter how much I wash them, nothing helps and I keep wanted to buy more and more Clorox . I don’t wanna buy another cleanser bc 1.) it’s 11:23pm and 2.) it will make things worse. I’m scared but I’m gonna cleanse my face with it anyways . 😞 please any advice would help

So my doctor is starting me on 25 mg of Zoloft soon and I'm actually really exicted. I'm finally ready for this to be manageable. I know it's not a cure but I am told that zoloft is primarily recommended for specifically ocd. I'm not sure if I'm ready to start it tonight but yeah. Please do not tell me any negative side effects or anything related to nausea since I'm taking it for emetophobic contamination ocd and I don't need any opinions to make me biased but if any of yoy had SUCCESSFUL zoloft stories please comment!!

I'll start by saying, I have not been clinically diagnosed, as I do not have the funds to see therapists or psychiatrists in my current situation. Once I'm in a better spot, I very much intend to. That to say; after months and months of having issues with anxiety, specifically health related, my partner was the one that mentioned OCD. I did have some somewhat OCD related behaviors in my youth, though those likely could be explained by potentially undiagnosed ASD (as my mother is on the spectrum as well as a sibling, both diagnosed.) But I never considered OCD taking form in a health sense. I posted earlier about how I've had 4 days of pretty minimal anxiety and intrusive thoughts, and it has led me to doubt the OCD label I've been working at treating? I don't want to be the person that identifies themselves with a disorder they don't have, which is why I hesitate to self diagnose with OCD or ASD or anything else. At the same time, I've read that a lot of even clinically diagnosed people with OCD doubt their diagnosis. It makes me wonder if I will always have this doubt, and if that means it is worth it or not to get tested? I know that if I do, they can actually do ERP (whereas I've been self taught and self guided so far) so that would be worth it...

17f So I don't have an official diagnosis, but I know I have it, I struggle with it since I was 4, I went through like almost every theme like contamination, symmetry, checking, existential, health anxiety, false memory, moral ocd, sexual ocds, and also a therapist told me I have it (another one said I have generalized anxiety disorder but idk like I was talking about textbook ocd to her) I don't have a therapist now therapy is not working out well for me but I was hoping to maybe get medication For me the absolute hell is POCD and real event ocd. I genuinely don't know how do I start. I also think I will replace POCD with harm ocd cause well I'm to scared to talk about POCD. But what do I even say like do I come in and talk about more obvious ocd stuff I experience and then randomly jump to POCD, seems like a crazy jump idk... Also I thought it will be in the evening and I will have time to prepare but it's in and hour and a half I'm terrified Anyone? Help? How do I start what do I say I'm so scared

Okay so my parents don't really handle my ocd that well. For starters my contamination is getting worse (I'm 14) and keep exisivly washing my hands, or using toilet roll which is unfortunately really common. Now they are getting angry at me for using too much toilet roll... What do I do? There saying I'm ruining there lifes because of my ocd. I'm making there lifes miserable. And they don't COMMUNICATE or sit down with me and look me in the eyes and try sort it out WITH ME. they just go "STOP USING SO, MUCH TOILET ROLL" "you've broke another headset" "WE ARE ALLOWED TO BE PISSED AT YOU" and I'm getting self harm urges because there making me out to be such a bad person. Which obviously doesn't mix well with ocd.

I've recently decided to get tested for HSV because I have kissed someone with HSV-1. I tested negative several months ago, but I want to be sure. Today I started feeling a tingling sensation and when I pressed my lips together I felt a bump there. So ever since, I've been trying to confirm if there is or is not a bump, where it is, if it's an early HSV breakout or an early pimple. The web searches say that tingle sensations usually means cold sore, but I know that as of a few months ago I tested negative and I have in fact had this tingle happen for zits along my lip line. So I'm super confused and dying to have an answer. I'm planning on heading in to a clinic for a test first thing tomorrow morning but if I can get any advice or knowledge I would so appreciate it, even if that advice and knowledge is helping me break from my compulsion to fidget with my lip or search up information.

Some one please help me. My OCD is phobias of lice and scabies. I feel like I’m always going to catch it. I stayed at a Disney hotel last week and now I have a bump on my hand. Doctors have said you can get them from hotels. Is this scabies starting or is this something not to worry about and it’s just my OCD taking over.

I was diagnosed with OCD around the age of 6, subtype- contamination primarily. It calmed down as I got older and I assumed it had gone away, but also didn’t realize it can show up in other ways, and it still had been effecting me which I know now. I’m not 31 and I’ve been in therapy for a year and it’s helped a lot, although I sometimes get thoughts that what if some of the stuff I’m dealing with isn’t ocd and I’m exaggerating. I feel like thoughts will feel sticky and I’ll do certain compulsions but then the thought eventually vanishes if I do it a few times which makes me think maybe it’s not OCD since other people/friends I know would probably do the exact same thing. Not sure if I’m making sense, but I guess my question is if that thought comes up with anyone else? Just being unsure if something you’re doing actually is ocd or not.

So, as of one hour ago today I am officially diagnosed with severe contamination ocd. I don't know how to process this, my moms crying, my therapist is moving to Uruguay and won't be able to continue our therapy, what in actual hell do I do. What am I doing. I don't know how to process this. The issue isn't just that I have it- it's that it's severe, not mild, not moderate, permanent. Incurable. I want a cure so bad, I want a magical pill to make it go away and it simply does not exist. Feel free to message me eith advice for newly diagnosed ocd'ers, I definitely could use it. Have a lovely day everyone ♡

My ocd has been at an extreme all time high the past 2 weeks and I am in dire need of some relief. I’m not sleeping right anymore. for context: I live in the south and found a springtail on my sheets about 2 weeks ago. This was like 2 days before our bug guy came and sprayed (it’s a normal maintenance thing here) so it’s a common bug down here and I’ve found them all over different areas of the house before. Finding it in my bed sent me on a bit of a spiral bc I started to doubt if it even was a springtail and that i was wrong and that it was a bed bug, not trusting my brain. It was a bad, sleepless night and carried over continuing feelings. Typical ocd stuff. Well two days later, I’m a nurse and I had a patient that actually had bed bugs. This wasn’t the first day they were here and I did not see any myself but it still freaked me out. There had one 2 founds after visitors came the day before. Of course I wore PPE in the room (coveralls shoe covers and hair net) going in and took everything off before exiting the room. When I came home I stripped in my garage and bagged everything down to my shoes. Threw everything in the wash and did multiple cycles. There were no other steps I could take but I still had a terrible night. Hours of ruminating and going back and forth about tracing my tracks, thinking of new ways I could’ve taken one home with me. Just checking everything. I was already on a spiral from the springtail. Having two such back to back triggering events for me so closely related has made me deteriorate significantly. I was already doing bad with my normal OCD and starting therapy here. I obsess over the thought of having bedbugs constantly and haven’t been able to sleep. I am constantly checking my bed while in it and can’t settle down. My bed is heavy too and I keep hurting myself lifting my mattress to check. But I need to check. I’ve become obsessed. I check everything and go down Reddit rabbit holes looking for new things. And of course, I talk myself into it every time. I can’t take it anymore, it’s bleeding off into other parts of my life like friendship and marriage because I am so high anxiety right now. I need relief so bad. I’ve never felt this unstable to be honest. I feel like even someone without ocd would be really struggling with this topic, nevermind me, with ocd to a point where I just started treatment. These aren’t even my normal intrusive thoughts and compulsive acts. It’s just taken on a life in the last week and I can’t find any sign that it’s going to slow down. when I think rationally I know I did everything right to prevent but I can’t shake it. 💔

This is a long one lol but basically, a couple of weeks ago I went to the toilet (#2, sorry for the tmi). Let's just say it was messy. I remember that a speck of.. #2.. Fell off the piece of toilet paper. This was probably the worst thing that could ever happen. I can't remember clearly but I'm pretty sure my jeans were on the floor underneath near where the speck could have fallen. There was also a towel. I don't know exactly where it fell as it was so small, but I made sure both the towel and the jeans went in the laundry basket and I cleaned the floor near there. Fast forward to like the next day. My mum does most of the laundry, so she will have picked up all the towels and clothes from the laundry basket and taken them to the wash. The problem is the speck. I don't know where it went but if it was on the towel and she picked it up.... Thus, contaminated mum. And she also puts clothes away that are dry. I remember that day she put my hoodie in my wardrobe, and I haven't worn it since because I feel it is contaminated. I haven't worn the clothes that have touched the hoodie. This leaves me with not a lot of clothes. And today I finally snapped and picked up a sweatshirt that had maybe touched the hoodie. And now I'm just sat here spiralling, wearing it. What if it touched the speck? What if the speck touched my mum and then touched the hoodie which then touched the sweatshirt I'm wearing? Please I'm so scared.

i feel the need to say sorry because i’m posting yet again. i’m having a REALLY DIFFICULT episode of ocd that i haven’t had for a few months now. i experience contamination ocd everyday and have constant anxiety attacks, however because that’s so normal to me and doesn’t affect anyone but myself, it doesn’t affect me in the same way harm ocd does. i haven’t had to deal with really bad harm ocd thoughts for a good bit now so i’m struggling so bad right now. if anyone has seen my previous posts (which i’m sure you have), this came about over a small change that happened a couple weeks ago. it’s now blossoming into a full episode. it’s making me feel paralyzed and not want to do anything, but i know in the past i had to force myself to distract myself by actually doing things. i’m supposed to hang out with my friend tomorrow, but i’m so close to cancelling because i feel like i can’t do it. my physical symptoms are also worse than what i feel like i’m used to and it’s terrifying me into thinking i’m gonna get sick. i just don’t know how to get through it. it feels like impending doom and constant panic. i just want to feel like myself again and happy

I’m 19 and struggle with health anxiety, contamination, harm, and magical thinking OCD and would love to meet people with similar experiences and hardships because I have never had an opportunity for such a supportive community!