Hi I have HOCD Since about 5 years now I would say. I’m just seeking for help and a community. The only way I get better is by distracting myself a lot through working or social media. But somethings even social media worsens it too with the rise of lgbtq communities presenting themselves. They make me question sometimes. But I just ignore. After all exposure gets you to slowly move on so it’s what’s best.

I understand, I’m a complete supporter of lgbtq and I’m happy that they are becoming more accepting nowadays. With my HOCD it’s very difficult. I’m a straight woman and it feels like all of my friends are either gay, or bi, or pan, or lesbian which is great but it makes me question myself. Like I just wonder “who am I” or do I need to be a part of them as well. It’s very triggering. I try to expose myself as well, we’re doing the best we can right now! I have been dealing with HOCD for about 5 months now, but it’s also been on and off for a few years but really started getting bad 5 months ago. It’s really hard to be okay nowadays, or to feel like myself. It’s hard to not feel like the “exception” and it’s hard to deal with the uncertainty. I feel like I just don’t know who I am, which makes sense, because my values are based around myself, family, love, and relationships. I’m sorry this is long, I just really feel this. HOCD is really hard, I sometimes wish I just had a different subtype because I feel like such a liar to everyone around me. I’m glad you have help and a community! Keep going, you aren’t alone!

It just means I am who I am and I am not working to put myself into a box. :) relax another humans story isn’t yours, as you see peoples stories trigger you and they are all different, you are you, and when you stop letting the aniexty and compulsions rule you, you will be more clear minded and confident in your own decisions

try taking out all compulsions, ruminating, checking, googling everything! 2nd mindfulness; recognize there are literally so many different types of sexualities! So if yoy don’t fit into a box that’s ok!! For me, I got “I’m gay” stuck in my head and then was like what the heck does this mean? I mean it literally repeated for months.. when I step back and take away all of my compulsions it becomes so much clearer to me that I am not someone who fits in a box, I am ME. And I am scared that someone is going to judge me on my sexuality because it doesn’t fit into a category. I like who I like, I’m not like oh I have a type or guys or girls or trans people. I just fall for who I do, even tho I’ve never been with anyone other then a man 😂 I’m married now and it attacked my marriage and made me feel like I was wrong because my sexuality is fluid. And sometimes stopping trying to figure out what you are is the first step to freedom. Sorry for the rant 😂